Your Leadership Style of Managing Up Matters (Manage Up Series 5/6)

Many things may be out of your control when managing up, but what is in your purview is the type of leader you want to be while aiming to make positive changes. In the book, Influence Without Authority, Dan Olsen talks about when communicating up, success depends on 60% substance and 40% style, so controlling your content and delivery will go a long way to achieving your outcome.

Here are some aspects to think about to manage up successfully:

1. Focus on what you can influence, and accept what you can’t.  It can be helpful to accept that sometimes we cannot change senior leadership, we can only change our behavior and be the leaders we wish we had.  Embrace the practices that you espouse.  For example, if you feel like your manager’s team purpose is non-existent and already pointed out that observation, you can offer your interpretation of the team’s purpose and operate on that view until otherwise told. 

2. Acknowledge their authority.  Ultimately, the person in power will probably make the final decision, so recognize that. You might say, “I know you’ll make the call here, would you be open to hearing some of my thoughts?”  This approach can show respect and offer a reminder of the choices available.  

3. Avoid judgments, share facts. When you express concerns, stay away from judgmental words such as “short-sighted” or “hasty” that might set off your manager and has the potential to be taken personally.  Sharing facts and examples will help you make your case much better.  For example, instead of saying, “I think that first-quarter deadline is naïve,” you can say, “We’ve tried four projects like this in the past, and we were able to do two in a similar time, but those were special circumstances.  What has changed or needs to change to deliver this work in the same time period?” You can call attention to the reality of the situation and be future-focused in thinking through how we can make this happen.

 4. Share disagreements humbly.  Even though your opinion might be well-informed and well-researched, it is still an opinion so talk tentatively where you leave room for the other person to weigh in.  Instead of saying “If we set an end-of-quarter deadline, we’ll never make it,” you might offer, “In my opinion, based on where we are now, I do not see how we will make that deadline.” You can also use phrases like, “I’m thinking aloud here.” This will leave room for dialogue, and it shows your curiosity about other perspectives.   You can even ask for permission to share your disagreements.  “I know we seem to be moving toward a first-quarter commitment here, I have reasons to think that it will not work. I’d like to lay out my reasoning.  Would that be OK?”  This gives the person choices and allows them to opt out.  You can further invite them to respond by asking them, “what might be missing from this assessment?”

5. Approach with inquiry.  If your manager has made a decision that has impacted your work, you can lead with open-ended questions such as, “I would love to understand the rationale for this decision, can you tell me what went into this?  Assumptions are counterproductive, share your thinking and genuinely seek to understand their perspective and what they are trying to get done.  It is helpful to assume positive intent because you only see one piece of the picture, meanwhile they have a more expansive view based on their leadership team meetings and discussions on what is coming down the pike.  They could also have stressors that you do not see or fully understand based on where you sit in the company.  

6. Pick your battles.  If it comes to stylistic differences, give your boss what they want.  If they prefer PowerPoint, but you prefer google slides, instead of spending energy arguing on small things, defer to their preferences.  Strive to win the big ones and not waste energy and psychological capital on the more minor points.

7. View your boss as your customer.  You may feel frustrated that you cannot get your job done because you are working on your boss’ items.  It is good to check in with yourself because your priority is your boss.’  How would your mindset be different if you saw your boss as your customer and you were working on satisfying their plans? 

8. Ask for their advice.  If you have determined that your boss has a “closed mind” about something, you can signal your openness by asking for their advice.  Adam Grant offers this example. “Let’s say you want your leader to take mental health seriously, you can use this phrasing, ‘I heard from many people that they are struggling with mental health, which can affect their well-being and I know you care about building a community here.  I want people to feel that they are cared about so I’m trying to think about how to do a better job supporting people, I’m not sure what to do next, but I know you are brilliant at getting things done and driving change.  Would you be willing to help with these cultural changes?’”  People like to feel included and genuine flattery can go a long way.  Plus, it is less threatening when you approach your comments not trying to make the person wrong and show that you have a superior way but are open to learning from the leader or co-creating something better together. You come across as an advocate and not an adversary.

Managing up involves both art and science to be successful.  You want to have the right content to share, as well as an effective delivery.  Using facts and inquiry, approaching disagreements humbly, and seeking true partnership can get you off to a great start.

Quote of the day: “One of the best ways to influence people is to make them feel important. Most people enjoy those rare moments when others make them feel important.  It is one of the deepest human desires.” -Roy T. Bennett.

Q:  What style do others use to manage up that you see as most effective?  Which is the least effective?  Comment and share below; we would love to hear from you!

[The next blog in this series 6/6 will focus on pitfalls to avoid when managing up]

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to sharpen their managing up skills, contact me to explore this topic further.

What is your leadership style when managing up?

Common Scenarios Where Managing Up Is Needed (Manage Up Series 4/6 )

In the last article, we covered managing up to pitch a project.  This blog will focus on many other situations where managing up can come in handy.

Let’s jump into a few common scenarios and approaches for managing up:

1. If you receive additional work unaligned with the priorities.  If you have been given an assignment that you cannot see the value in or the connection to the bigger strategic vision, you can ask questions to get clarity.  How do you see this new idea fitting in with our current goals?  If we take on this new initiative, our capacity will be reduced, we may need to drop or delay another, in that case; which one would you be willing to deprioritize?  Depending on your boss’ style, if you think it is overloading to have them select from open-ended options, you can suggest one to deprioritize to make it easier.  If you prefer to delay, you can say, “Is this idea something we need to implement now, or could it be considered for the next quarter/year?  By laying out how pursuing a new idea will impact other priorities, you can help your boss assess what makes the most sense from a strategic perspective.

2. If you receive vague work.  You can take steps to elicit more thoughtful contributions by asking questions to prompt more critical thinking.  Tell me how you see that working?  What would you like the outcomes to be so we can get the best results possible?  What does success look like?  Are there examples of things you have seen that you like and want to include?  These prompts encourage the leader to expand on their ideas to add more definition to make your work easier.

3. If you disagree with your boss on a topic.  You can be forward-thinking and ask, how would you prefer me to handle this the next time this comes up?  If no answer is provided, you can offer your thought process of how you would handle it and invite your boss to comment on your plan so you can test to see that you are on the same wavelength and make the necessary adjustments. This way, you can create predictable and effective ways of working.

4. If your manager is acting as a bottleneck to your work.   If your work process is slowed because you are waiting on your boss’ approval for the next project, you can say, “I know hitting the deadline on this project is a priority for you, in order not to delay the release of this work, here are the two things I would need from you by this date.  Do you see any obstacles with that timeline?”  Let me know how I can make any adjustments to keep us on track with achieving this priority. 

5. If your manager is doing things that hurt their reputation.  You can say, “I don’t know if you’re intending to come off like this, but here’s how you’re being perceived, I have some thoughts on how I can help with that if you are interested.”  Most leaders want to hear this news especially if it is broached in a respectful and trusting manner.

6. If you suspect incompetence.  Try and diagnose the issue and figure out exactly how the incompetence shows up.  Do they lack experience?  Do they have poor emotional intelligence?  Is their decision-making shaky?  Do they not hold people accountable?  Is it incompetence or just a different approach?  If you can pinpoint and categorize the problem, you and your team can create targeted strategies to address the deficiency and better manage up. 

7. If your manager is micromanaging.  Learn to see if it is just happening with you or is common with other members.  Suppose it is prevalent and causing delays in getting the work done and negatively impacting the organization.  In that case, it is worth speaking up to make changes at a more systematic level rather than changing the style with just you.  You can share your understanding of the expectations and see if they are on the same page this way you can focus more on the outcomes rather than the activities and methods used to achieve those results.

8. If your role is ambiguous.  Be proactive.  Many Directs want their boss to define their job for them, but you are missing out on the opportunity to craft your job.  If you have the chance to create your scope and how it advances the mission and purpose, lay the first stake, and then ask what they would add.  You can say, “Here is what I think success looks like, what is your version, and what would you contribute”?  Here are the skillsets and capabilities I am honing for this job and my development plan, what else should I consider if my goal is to get to the Director level so I can set more of the creative strategic direction? Communicate what you need to be successful in terms of timely information, access, guidance, and resources.  You can use “If-Then Statements,” If I am going to do this, then I need these three things in place to be successful, how do you see this best working? 

9. If your one-on-ones are not useful.  Instead of merely providing status updates, include strategic issues. Suggest ideas on promoting your team for more visibility within your company or discuss process improvements.   Be sure you prepare an agenda to make the best use of your time together.  They will access your thoughtfulness and be more inclined to hear your suggestions.

10. If you feel like your manager is not giving you valuable feedback on your performance.  You can ask, what can I do or stop doing that would improve my performance?  What would make it easier for you to work with me?  Embrace the discomfort, after you ask that question, pause and do not be the next person to respond.  Listen with the intent to understand, not to respond.  You do not have to agree with the feedback, but it can be helpful to hear it.  Check for understanding by saying, “This is what I hear you saying, if I were to change x, y, and z, it would impact the team in a, b, or c ways?  What have I gotten right and what am I missing?” To ensure the alignment, you can even follow up with an email with the key takeaways and next steps.

11. If you are not getting feedback on a project.  If your boss always says, everything is great, go you.  You can say, can I get your advice on X, if you were driving my research, what would be top of mind for you?  Here is my goal for the next week or two to advance this project, I would love your guidance on whether I identified the right goals and how best to achieve them.  What obstacles should I be looking out for?  Annie McKee founder of Teleos Leadership Institute offers to say something like, “I want to do a good job and achieve my goals, and I need your help to do that.”  Be specific about what you want: their input on a particular piece of work, an introduction to another colleague, their permission to reach out to a client, etc.  If they cannot help, suggest an alternative and help them solve the problem, you can ask them if they can ask one of your peers for input or an introduction.  When you change your questions, you can more likely change the responses you are getting.

12. If you want your manager’s feedback on your overall development. You can share what you are doing to work on your growth goals, “What I am struggling with personally is how to make sure all people have a voice in the room and are heard, sometimes I get excited, and that enthusiasm makes it hard for others to get their voice in.  I want to run a flip meeting where I listen instead of sharing.  Do you think people would like that, or would it be a deer in headlights situation?  What suggestions do you have to ensure this is done well or that I succeed?”  You make it much easier for your leader to weigh in on areas that matter to you when you through out a statement or idea in which to react.

13. Take time to signal what works for you.  When you share with your leader what they do well or what works for you, you set them up to repeat that behavior.  For example, you might say, “I really liked when you made that email introduction, it made my work go so much faster, and I would welcome additional opportunities like that to advance future work.”  Formulating clarity in your requests will yield much better results.

Learning the skill of managing up in a variety of situations is critical to maintaining a great relationship with your boss and in the advancement of the goals of the organization. It is a muscle that we can all build with the right intention.

Quote of the day:  “Request, don't complain. Inside every complaint is a request. Find it and make it.” -Mary Abbajay, 

Q:  What is the hardest situation for you to manage up?  What makes it so hard? Comment and share below; we would love to hear from you!

[The next blog in this series 5/6 will focus on your style of managing up]

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to sharpen their managing up skills, contact me to explore this topic further. 

The Art of Managing Up

Approaches to managing up for a project (Manage Up Series 3/6 )

How often have you had a great idea that you wanted to pitch to your manager but pulled the plug because you believed it would get rejected?  Perhaps your idea could have brought massive benefits to the team and the organization, but you were convinced that your boss would miss the value.  Great managers provide forums for you to share and disagree.  But we do not always get to choose the people we work for.  When we can strengthen our skills of managing up, we can better lead for impact.

To increase your effectiveness in pitching a project, here are aspects to consider:

1. Bring a first draft plan and co-create.  When you are pitching a project idea, talk about the challenge being addressed, possible solutions, pros and cons of each, your recommendation, and how that solution ties into the bigger picture and the company goals and vision.  Co-create by asking your boss what they would add to your idea to improve its value.  If you are sensing they are opposed to it, you can ask – do you see any reasons why this may not work?  You can ask for their biggest objections they or another might have and if those were addressed, do they see any reason why the project should not go forward then?

2. Tackle the costs head on.  Having a handle on the costs will help you anticipate their possible rejections and prepare for them.  If you do not share them, they will likely be presented for you, instead, you can say, “here are the costs, and here is why I see them worth the benefit.”  Every organization has limited resources, time, and energy; accepting your idea may mean the rejection of another idea that someone else believes is wonderful so having that broader view will be important to making your case.

3. Share potential risks.  When you can brainstorm and analyze potential risks for new projects, categorize whether it is high or low, and share your analysis, you show your boss that you are thinking strategically, especially when you include recommended risk mitigation strategies and backup plans.  They will know that you put in considerable thought and will be more receptive to hearing your approach.   

4. Depict the positive impact beyond your team.  When presenting an idea, be sure to tie it to a positive impact.  Peter Drucker said, “ideas that make no positive impact are meaningless data.”  You are a small piece in the mosaic that your boss is weaving.  When influencing up, focus on the impact of the decision on the overall corporation.  In most cases, the needs of the department are clearly aligned with the company directly, and in other cases, this connection is not so obvious.  Be clear on making that link and do not assume it is automatically seen. Your best wins will relate to a larger goal and not just be about achieving your objectives because if your boss is helping just you, they may be disadvantaging another teammate and the resources they may need. 

5. Show success examples.  Point to examples used by other teams and how you mimic those efforts and processes for the best results.  You can even factor in the customizations you have made to better fit with the intricacies of your team.

6. Reduce workload.  The best recommendations take work off people’s plates.  If you happen to put work on, what can you do to minimize it?  Can you own the scheduling and logistics or volunteer to present the work at the meeting? How can you make it easy for your boss to say yes and show that it will not add extensive work?

There is an art to managing up.  When you can utilize critical thinking skills in presenting your idea, explaining pros and cons, and offering your recommendation, you make it easy for your manager to join you as a collaborative partner to endorse your project. 

Quote of the day: “Real control is influencing someone to the point that [they] believe [their] choices are [their] own.” – G.R. Morris

Q:  How do you pitch your projects for the greatest success?  What has worked and what hasn’t? Comment and share below, we would love to hear from you!

[The next blog in this series 4/6 will focus on numerous managing up scenarios and the best approaches to take]

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to sharpen their managing up skills, contact me to explore this topic further. 

What works for you in managing up?

The Pre-Work You Need to Manage Up (Manage Up Series 2/6)

Managing up is a required skill in every job.  Doing this well will allow you to advance your career and bring benefits to your team and the organization.   

Before jumping into best practices for managing up, it is helpful to think about the prework you want to complete so you are in the best position to succeed. 

Here are some critical aspects to uncover:

1. Know your leader’s communication style.  Executive Coach Julie Kantor says, “some bosses readily explain to subordinates how and when they want to communicate.  Others do better when offered multiple-choice questions.  If your boss has not willingly told you, seek agreements on methods and cadence for updates.  You can ask, how often do you want updates: daily, weekly, or only when I have something to report?  Do you prefer phone, instant messaging, email, or face-to-face?”  Getting this information clear will contribute to an excellent relationship, allowing for managing up to occur more easily.  Also, maybe your boss prizes unstructured chat time before diving into the work, whereas you prefer having work updates first and chat time at the end if there is time because it is how you operate with your direct reports.  It is better to adjust your style to fit your boss’ preference rather than impose your will.

1A. Understand their listener/reader style.  You can adjust your style in response to your boss’ preferred method of receiving information.  Peter Drucker, often described as the founder of modern management, divided bosses into “readers” and “listeners.”  If your boss is a reader, they like to get information in report form so they can read and study it.  In that case, you want to include important points in your memo and then discuss them.   Others are listeners, they work better with hearing information presented and being able to ask questions immediately in real time.  In this case, you may want to verbally share to have that back and forth and then follow up with notes of what has been discussed.  This contributes to creating fertile ground for managing up to occur.

1B. Understand their preference for updates.  Some bosses prefer to be involved in decisions and problems as they arise.  These are high-involvement managers who like to keep their hands on the pulse of the operation during critical moments, so it is best to be proactive in including them.  Other bosses prefer to delegate and be less involved.  They expect you to come to them with major problems and inform them about any significant changes.  When keeping these bosses in the loop, be clear on what you are doing and if there is anything you should be doing differently, let them know you welcome their input.  This critical information will allow you to move to the next stage and not waste weeks of work because you did not allow your boss an opportunity to weigh in earlier.  Managing up will be easier when these processes are established.

1C. Have the expectations discussion.  Many people assume the boss will magically know what information to give their subordinates.  Some are naturally good at this, and some are not.  Be proactive at the outset and ask.  What are your expectations from me?  What is a good way to exchange feedback?  Do not assume that just because you like to receive feedback in a particular way from your direct reports, it will be the same style as what your boss will want from you.  Be proactive in uncovering expectations that will set you up for managing up success. 

2. Understand their decision-making style.  Do they make decisions intuitively and change their mind a lot, or do they prefer a more fact-based approach and need lots of data and time to arrive at an action slowly, or any combination of the two?  When you are trying to influence, you can use their style to shape your approach.  Maybe they want to be in control, so you would give them information about what you are doing and offer choices about the next steps so they can make the ultimate decision.

3. Understand your manager's strengths, weaknesses, and motivations.  When you can go to them on a topic that utilizes one of their strengths, they can help more efficiently.  When you go to them in an area of weakness, you may be disappointed.  In that case, it can be a good opportunity for you to be proactive in taking more of a leadership role.  For example, maybe your boss is not strong at creating team bonding events, you can volunteer to take the lead on that.  Furthermore, knowing what they care about and advancing that interest can be helpful.  Dr. Julie Kantor, Executive Coach says, “It pays to figure out what motivates your boss, do they need to look important? Find ways to help them talk about their successes.”  If your boss’ boss cares about retention and building community, you can link the team bonding event to a larger and more critical initiative that would bode well for your leader.

4. Know your leader’s realities.  What numbers are your boss being measured on?  How is their boss defining success?  What are their goals and pressures?  How does your work fit into this bigger picture?  You can exhibit upward empathy and learn about what the specific work is like for your boss, what makes it hard, and what might you be unintentionally contributing to the difficulty level.  Without this information, you might be flying blind so your efforts to manage up would likely be fruitless.

5. Know the organization.  Some organizations are more hierarchical so it can feel threatening to have direct reports speak up.  Find out the informal rules so you can be more clued in on how to operate within the existing structures before you aim to make changes.

This kind of preparation can be used to develop and manage a healthy working relationship - one that is compatible with both work styles and strengths so you can do great work together.

Quote of the day: “Think twice before you speak because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another.”  -Napoleon Hill

Q:  What is one way to learn your boss’ key stated and unstated priorities?  Comment and share below, we would love to hear from you!

[The next blog in this series 3/6 will focus on managing up for project work]

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to sharpen their managing up skills, contact me to explore this topic further.

What do you know about your leader’s style?

We All Need to Manage Up (Manage Up Series 1/6)

It is quite common to have a different perspective from our managers and want to find effective ways to speak up to alter outcomes.  Toeing the line between skillfully influencing regardless of your position and not overstepping in a way that disrespects your leader and damages your reputation can be tricky. When we can hone the skill of managing up, we can make a positive difference in our teams and in our organizations.

Harvard Business School Professor John Kotter defines managing up as the process of consciously working with your superior to obtain the best possible results for you, your boss, and the company.  It is a way of customizing your work style to best suit your managers for optimum collective success.  It can also refer to your tactics to build a strong relationship with your boss to make work easier.  Sue Shellenbarger in the Wall Street Journal writes, "Managing up, or building smooth, productive relationships with higher-ups, requires understanding and adapting to your boss’s communication and decision-making style.”  Clearly, the approach you take to manage up matters.

Mastering this skill has copious benefits.  You can effectively shape the agenda by better advocating for what you want, asking for resources, and promoting your team’s successes.  The organization benefits as well.  When you have a strong relationship with your manager and know a good method to be heard, you can achieve more win-wins.  Instead of contributing to a culture of silence where people do not voice their views, you can create a conduit for great ideas to see the light of day.  Organizations want people who can vigorously campaign on behalf of their team with excellent intentions to impact productivity, morale, and retention positively.

Choosing when to speak up is not always easy and straightforward.  Here are some situations that could be helpful to chime in:

1. When it is at the cost of the company’s mission and integrity.  If something is happening that is damaging the company’s reputation internally or externally, it can be essential to get involved.  If you know that corners are being cut and there is a negative impact on customers or other stakeholders, your manager will want to know this.

2. When your motives are genuine.  If you have already checked in with yourself and ruled out jealousy or other less envious motives, and it is really about the benefit to the team, organization, or stakeholders, it is a good time to manage up to share constructive concerns collaboratively.

3. When you have established trust and credibility.  When you have shown yourself to be a dependable person that delivers consistent, timely, and excellent quality work, you will be in a good position to manage up.  If you are not a model of what you seek, your message will be harder to convey and be heard. This reminds me of Jordan Peterson’s rule 6: set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world.  While I disagree with the word perfect, the underlining sentiment of being an example of what you are trying to change is powerful.   Nobody wants to listen to somebody who cannot do the thing they are advocating.

4. When there are massive communication gaps.  You may have assumptions that your boss has a view of you that is inaccurate.  You may want to check in, clear the air, and frame the perception that more precisely depicts who you are instead of them filling in the gaps so you can speak up and align on a shared reality. I had a client who was working on a massive project, culminating in a pivotal stakeholder meeting where a decision had to be made. When the boss viewed the invite list, she said the list looked random and did not understand why some attendees were present.  My client wanted to take a moment to zoom out and inform her leader of the broader picture, that she had been talking to all those stakeholders regularly and had an excellent explanation for each person’s attendance.  Having that conversation to loop her boss in was essential because while they may have initially thought my client was careless in their selection, they were, in fact, deliberate. 

5. When it is for the leader’s benefit.  Business management expert Patrick Lencioni advocates managing up to benefit the leader.  He said, “do not expect that the manager is leading exactly the way they want.”  He shared a story of when a direct report came to him as a great example of managing up.  Lencioni promoted somebody who was not team-oriented, which violated one of the company values.  So, the direct report went to Lencioni and said, I know you have a lot on your plate, but I noticed an inconsistency that I wanted to share and learn more about the reasoning behind the decision. You talk about teamwork being important but just promoted the least teamwork-focused person, so I think to address the disconnection, we either should change what we believe or move him to another place where he would be a better fit.  Lencioni shared that he was happy to have that blind spot bought to his attention and believed that if you only hear about frustrations when your team hands you a resignation letter, it is unfair because it does not give the leader a chance to course correct.  

Another client of mine had a similar situation speaking up regarding their boss’ blind spot.  The boss would think out loud at meetings and share fleeting comments to the team about possibly doing more research.  Some team members would interpret those passing thoughts as requests, and a couple of people would work on the same project and waste time and resources.  Others would view those thoughts as just verballing processing and would not do anything and the boss would wonder why no action was taken.  So, my client shared this observation with their boss, “I noticed this phenomenon happening where your verbal brainstorming is creating confusion and might be wasting time, I’m wondering what if, at the end of a meeting, we share one thing to investigate and one person to do that so there is clarity and no overlap?  How would that work for you, or what would you add to reduce the confusion?”  Before sharing your idea, you can even invite your boss to share possible solutions before you offer yours.  This is a great topic to manage up because you are proposing a process change to improve the business and inviting a co-creating experience.

When NOT to manage up:

1. Personality difference with no business benefit.  If you simply do not like your manager’s style and changing it would make your life easier but have no positive impact on the business or other team members, then it is misusing the spirit of managing up.  For example, if you want your manager to be more optimistic and less realistic because that is your preference, you may be unable to change that.  It is good to ask yourself, how is my request impacting the business other than it’s annoying me?  If their approach is leading to hours wasted, unnecessary confusion, and a lack of direction for you and the team, that’s different.  Tapping into the bigger reason we are here and how we can align to make the business successful is a good guide to managing up.

2. You think you can be leading better.  You may believe you can do the job better than your manager, many of us feel that way from time to time and that can be ok, but when you take action to undermine your boss or try to win or be right at your boss’s expense, that is crossing the line.  To be successful at your job, it is helpful to support your leader publicly and make them look good rather than asserting your will.  And if you believe you can do a better job, great, do your best to get promoted based on the quality of your work and your integrity and when you get that promotion, you will get a chance to lead in the way you want, and your direct reports will follow you based on your style and the benefits that you deliver.

When you can learn the skill of managing up, it will make you a more effective contributor.  The best indicator of managing up is when there is a triple win – you win, your manager/team wins, and the company wins. 

Quote of the day: “Example is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the only thing.” – Albert Schweitzer. 

Q:  When was the last time you had to manage up?  What worked that you would want to repeat?  Comment and share below; we would love to hear from you!

The next blog in this series 2/6 will focus on helpful prework to do to manage up.

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to sharpen their managing up skills, contact me to explore this topic further.

How do you manage up?

Strategic Thinking Requires Time (Strategy Series 3/3)

How much of your time in your calendar is dedicated to strategy and long-term planning?  In one survey of 10,000 senior leaders, 97% said that being strategic was the most important leadership behavior to their organization’s success.  Yet, it is not being done. 

Common challenges leaders have in finding time for strategic planning:

1. Short-term focused.  Most leaders want to spend more time on strategy but one challenge that keeps them from the practice is being too enmeshed in the near term.   Rich Horwath, CEO of the Strategic Thinking Institute, found that 96% of leaders surveyed claimed they lacked time for strategic thinking because they were too busy putting out fires.  Some leaders do not know how to step away from the whirlwind.  For example, Lisa, an HR Vice President, explained how she approached her job in a transactional manner, simply aiming to get the next hire and not recognizing that she needed an entirely new approach to recruitment and retention for a fast-growing company.  To do the latter effectively, she needed to step away from her workload and short-term hiring goals to create the think time to rework defective processes and devise a more scalable system that will allow her to streamline the hiring process that will eventually save significant time in the long run.

2. Poor email management.  The volume of emails keeps leaders focused on immediate and sometimes low-priority concerns.  According to a Radicati Group analysis, we receive an average of 126 emails per day.  I have some executive clients who receive 400+ emails.  If you were to categorize your emails, which ones are truly valuable and which ones are time sucks?  How much time do you spend on emails?  How much time do you want to spend?  How is your time on emails serving your long-term goals?  What’s your plan to free yourself from this time-consuming activity? 

3. Failure to prioritize and delegate.  When you create a jam-packed schedule and are running from meeting to meeting, you cannot contribute strategically without adequate time to reflect on the issues and consider all the options.  What meetings do you need to deprioritize?  How can you delegate so you do not have to be at all places at all times?  Our routine can put a damper on strategy time, so how can you reallocate your time to prioritize the unfamiliar and non-routine activities to increase your capacity to act more strategically?  In a ten-year longitudinal study of over 2,700 newly appointed executives, 67% of them said they struggled with letting go of work from previous roles.  Trying to do everything yourself is a sure path to limiting your leadership and that of others because they do not have the chance to grow.

4. Falling into the competency trap.  This is when you continue to do a previous task related to execution because you do it well, enjoy it, and get a confidence boost because you are accumulating expertise in that one task. The problem is that while you are doing that work, you might be neglecting the other activities such as strategic planning and setting vision and direction, which are skills more needed by the business. What produced your past successes likely will be different than the future wins you will need to succeed. Indeed, you can deliver amazing work on the wrong things and it will go unnoticed.  If you are in stage 3 of your leadership but still doing stage 2 work, it is time to depart from your comfort zone and exercise new strategic muscles.

To avoid some of these challenges, create space in your schedule:

Strategic thinking does not necessarily mean numerous sabbaticals or extensive leadership retreats but is more about carving out consistent space.  As productivity expert David Allen shared in an interview with Dorie Clark for her book Stand Out, “You don’t need time to have a good idea, you need space…. It takes zero time to have an innovative idea or to make a decision, but if you don’t have psychic space, those things are not necessarily impossible, but they’re suboptimal.”

Once you find that calendar time, some executives may not know how to begin their strategic thinking time.  I find that some of my clients put too much pressure on themselves believing they must begin with states of enlightenment that yield novel insights, but it can start much smaller.

Here are some things you can do during your protected strategetic and think time sessions:

1. You can distinguish the urgent from the important.  Stephen Covey’s 2 x 2 matrix is helpful for this in separating more immediate needs from longer and more meaningful work.  Where do you want to have an impact?  What will it take to achieve success?  How will the organization evolve to meet challenges on the horizon?  These are the kinds of deep, foundational questions that are best addressed with long-term planning.

2. Think with others to get an outside perspective.  Reach out to other departments or build rapport with leaders, managers, front-line team members, and customers to listen and understand their roles, concerns, and ideas.  This will add to your knowledge bank of all parts of the organization to better utilize those insights in your projects to ensure alignment with the corporate strategy from the outstart.  You can also think about how to use other partners for new initiatives and create win-win experiences.  As you develop these relationships, you will learn more elements of the business and know which key individuals to call when you want to brainstorm or move past an obstacle.  It would help if you also were proactive about connecting with peers outside your organization and in your industry to understand their observations.  You can share your ideas across your network for greater meaning-making.

3. Expand your cross-functional learning.  When you understand more about all areas of the organization and know who all the key players are, each project you work on becomes a puzzle.  When you move pieces, you can see how it affects others either directly or indirectly.  When you consider the impacts of your decisions on all company domains, you see the big picture more clearly.  That is strategy.

4. Ask other strategic thinkers about their processes.  Turn to people who have skills you admire and find out what their process is as a prime learning opportunity.  You can start the conversation with, “I noticed you offer really valuable contributions in the meetings; I would love to know your process for strategic thinking?  Where do you get your insights from?”  You’ll be surprised how quickly others engage and what you can discover.

5. Learn.  Read books and articles, listen to podcasts and interviews, and watch instructive videos and webinars to expand your thinking and learn new approaches relevant to your specific situation.  There are many valuable conversations happening in your industry, especially among futurists who have spent much time thinking about these topics.  How do you receive regular doses of information that can spark your own?  Are there classes, industry conferences, professional gatherings, or associations that you can attend?  Can you form a book group with your coworkers to have dedicated space for this type of learning? It doesn’t need to be time-intensive, even just 10 minutes of reading and 30-minute discussions can yield significant returns.

6. Take a break.  It can be common to think that to accomplish your work, you must increase your hours.  In fact, research by Bob Sullivan reveals that productivity decreases for those who work more than 50 hours per week.  When you can let your mind wander, you can come up with great strategic ideas.  Lin Manuel Miranda came up with the idea for his award-winning play Hamilton when he was on vacation with his wife fishing.  You can check out my other blog on the importance of taking breaks for breakthroughs.

7. Reflect.  Do you regularly ask, what’s working and what’s not?  How can you chronicle your successes and failures to rethink your approach to make it even more strategic?  You can develop a reflective practice that can be as little as one or five minutes that will engender tremendous value because you will be more intentional about your actions and contributions.

8. Pick a small project to experiment.  Is there one project you can work on regularly to develop some of your strategic skills?  You can test a hypothesis and run an experiment and once you take action, reflect on your progress and learnings and then iterate to improve even more.  If you just stay in your head without taking action, you will rob yourself of the best learnings, which usually come when you try something and get immediate feedback.

9. Engage in meaning-making activities.  Developing great strategic thinking skills requires you to gain exposure to key roles, synthesize broad information, participate in a culture of curiosity, and gather experiences that allow you to identify patterns and connect the dots in novel ways. That’s why leadership development programs often include job rotations, cross-functional projects, and face time with senior leadership - they accelerate your critical thinking.  You can take that 30-foot view to better understand those issues that get raised over and over in different parts of the organization.  Why hasn’t anybody solved them yet?  What’s been the dominant approach? What’s a different approach to take?

Leaders know the value of spending time on strategic thinking, yet they are not doing it because of the challenges of short-term thinking and the urgency of trivial tasks. Start by fostering a practice for thinking and reflecting that will help you develop strategies that can bring significant benefits to you and your organization.

Quote of the day: “Get off of the dance floor and look at your operation from the balcony.” - Ron Heifetz, Harvard Professor

Q: What is your thinking and reflecting practice?  Comment and share with us, we would love to hear!

 As a Leadership Coach, I partner with leaders to engage in strategic thinking for them and their teams, contact me to learn more.

How do you create space to strategize?

Top 11 Ways to Think Strategically (Strategy series 2/3)

Have you ever been told that you need to be more strategic without giving any concrete guidance on how to do that?  If this is a top visible skill that helps you climb the organizational chart, it is worth the effort to grow the ability, regardless of your current position. 

Being a strategic thinker can involve the big-picture, where you are not making decisions in a vacuum.  You consider the future direction, how other departments might be affected, and how the outside world could respond to your choices.

Here are some specific approaches you can take to be a more strategic or a big picture thinker:

1. Take a stakeholder-centered approach.  Step outside of your silo and stand in the shoes of all those connected to and impacted by your company.  Consider these perspectives:

·      Go vertical (up and down).  Step back and survey the landscape to see the system.   You can think about the customer, direct reports, manager, skip manager, CEO, shareholders, and community – both locally and globally.  Ask the question – what do these people want and need?  Where are the common denominators?

·      Go horizontal (left and right).  How are you considering other departments in your strategy?  How is it aligned with the company’s domestic and international vision?  Look across to your direct competitors or beyond to other industries to collect some of the best ideas and trends to make sense of the data in terms of what it means for your team and your company.

·      Use an impact lens.  What will be the result of your strategy on your organization and these various stakeholders?  Do the outcomes support the broader goals of the organization?  What could negatively impact the results?  What do business partners need to understand to ensure its success?  Having some answers to these questions can help you be more thoughtful and strategic. 

2. Consider the timeframe.  What are you trying to do in the short-term v. long-term?  What does success look like in 6 months?  1 year?  3 years?  What are the early signs of success/failure?  What skills and talent will it take to succeed in the long term?  If you were to create a basic road map to navigate to success, what would that look like? How will you know when you have arrived? Whom do you need to support your journey?

3. Think about challenges and ask key questions.  Anticipating problems and trends within your organization and industry can be immensely powerful. You may want to ask: What are the three most important challenges today?  How about the most significant future challenges?  How does today’s work fit into future work?  This is how a commander approaches their work, they seek to understand how each battle plays a part in the larger war.   What challenge would be the hardest to tackle that you cannot see right now? What challenge would be the most important or lead domino that would knock over several other dominos?

4. To be a strategic thinker, develop problem-solving skills.  Most people want to offer a solution to the problem before adequately defining it.  Quick fixes may seem convenient, but they often solve only the surface issues and waste resources that could otherwise be used to tackle the real cause.  The 5 WHYs technique is great for getting at the root cause and preventing stubborn or recurrent problems as they are symptoms of deeper causes.  It was developed and fine-tuned within the Toyota Motor Corporation as a critical component of its problem-solving training.  Sakichi Toyoda, the Japanese Thomas Edison and architect of the Toyota Production System in the 1950s, describes the method in his book as “the basis of Toyota’s scientific approach . . . by repeating the word why five times, the nature of the problem as well as its solution becomes clear.”  Today, the method is used far beyond Toyota and is popular in lean development. 

Here is an example from Buffer:

1. Why did the system go down?  [Because the database became locked.]

2. Why did it become locked?   [Because there were too many database writes]

3. Why were we doing too many database writes?  [Because this was not foreseen, and it was not load tested]

4. Why wasn’t this change load tested? [Because we don’t have a development process set up for when we should load test changes]

5. Why don’t we have a development process for when to load test?  [We’ve never done too much load testing and are hitting new levels of scale.]

It is going beyond the presenting issue and symptoms to treat the root cause.

5. You can question basic assumptions.  If you are discussing a long-term company strategy upon which years of effort and expense will be based, you can ask basic questions about your beliefs.  How do you know that business will increase?  What does the research say about your expectations about the future of the market?  Have you taken the time to step into the figurative shoes of your customers as a “secret shopper?”  Another way to question your assumptions is to consider alternatives.  You might ask: what if our clients changed?  What if our suppliers went out of business?  These sorts of questions help you gain new and vital perspectives that help hone your thinking.

6. Use First principles thinking.   It is the best way to reverse-engineer complicated problems and reveal creative possibilities. The idea is to break down complex problems into fundamental elements and then reassemble them from the ground up.  It’s one of the best ways to learn to think for yourself, unlock your creative potential, and move from linear to non-linear results.  This approach was used by the philosopher Aristotle who defined it as the first basis from which a thing is known, and now by Elon Musk and Charlie Munger.  It is about thinking like a scientist and not assuming anything; What is true and what has been proven?

Musk gave an example of how Space X uses first principles to innovate at low prices.  People thought battery packs were expensive because that’s the way they have been in the past.  Musk responded,

“Well, no, that’s pretty dumb… Because if you applied that reasoning to anything new, then you wouldn’t be able to ever get to that new thing…. you can’t say, … oh, nobody wants a car because horses are great, and we’re used to them and they can eat grass and there’s lots of grass all over the place and … there’s no gasoline that people can buy.   Historically, battery packs cost $600 per kilowatt-hour… So the first principles would be, … what are the material constituents of the batteries?  What is the spot market value of the material constituents? … It’s got cobalt, nickel, aluminum, carbon, some polymers for separation, and a steel can.  So break that down on a material basis; if we bought that on a London Metal Exchange, what would each of these things cost?  Oh, jeez, it’s … $80 per kilowatt-hour.  So, clearly, you just need to think of clever ways to take those materials and combine them into the shape of a battery cell, and you can have batteries that are much, much cheaper than anyone realizes.”

First principles thinking allows you to see problems from multiple angles and interpret complex and conflicting information with curiosity and open-mindedness, and that’s what strategic thinking is all about.

7. See the rich interconnectivity.  Agents can sometimes interact in ways where they fundamentally change each other and something entirely different and unpredictable emerges from the contact.  Paul Cilliers used the following analogy: “a jumbo jet is complicated (it is equal to the sum of its parts), and if you had to take it apart or reverse actions, you could, mayonnaise is complex (once mixed, you can’t separate the parts again; the Interaction fundamentally changes them).”  In other words, complex systems are subject to co-evolution, and once it happens, it’s irreversible.  How can you factor this idea into your strategy or big-picture thinking?  Which steps you choose to take will be easily reversible, and which ones are permanent?  How will that impact your experiments? Knowing this information will help you thrive in a VUCA world.

8. Use Polarity Thinking.  In Adam Grant’s Think Again, he talks about polarity thinking.  For example, how can two great thought leaders have two different perspectives?  Daniel Goleman would argue that EQ matters more than IQ as it can determine 90% of a leader’s success.  In contrast, Jordan Peterson would maintain that EQ is a corporate marketing scheme; he downplays its importance.  How can these two PhD holders be right if they have opposite views?  Polarity thinking can allow both of them to be right, especially when thinking about context.  Instead of talking about why it is important, you want to talk about WHEN it is important.  EQ is beneficial with jobs that deal with perceiving and understanding emotions (customer service, counseling) but less relevant and even detrimental where emotions are less essential (mechanics, accountants).  How can you apply polarity thinking or both/and approach to your business as a creative exercise? 

9. Consider the 4 Cs analytical framework.  Adam Brandenburger writes about contrast, combination, constraint, and context to get creative with your strategy:

·      Contrast.  Challenge the assumptions undergirding the status quo.

·      Combination.  Steve Jobs famously said that creativity is “just connecting things”; what products or services seem independent from or even in tension with one another can you link?

·      Constraint.  A good strategist looks at an organization’s limitations and considers how they might become strengths.  A lack of resources can be a fertilizer for innovation.  Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley wrote Frankenstein when she was staying near Lake Geneva during an unusually cold and stormy summer and found herself trapped indoors with nothing to do but exercise her imagination.  Artists are pretty familiar with limitations, from setbacks to structural ones like writing a 14-line poem.  How can you take a no and turn it into a yes?  A client I was coaching was trying to get a budget for a new hire and when she was told no, she remained undeterred.  She came up with an internal rotation idea as a way of repurposing talent to help on other teams.  This solution helped with another goal of reducing burnout and attrition because it gave other people an option of doing different work, exercising their passion, and staying engaged.

·      Context.  If you reflect on how a problem which is similar to yours was solved in an entirely different context, surprising insights may emerge.

10. Scenario planning.  How can you lay out 3 likely scenarios, a least likely one, and a crazy one so you are prepared for as much as you can?  What redundancies can you put into place so that there is support in place if one path fails? How can you anticipate what other people want and are likely to do so you can craft your response? Art Kleiner, Editor-in-Chief of PwC Global promotes the habit of mentalizing - which is thinking about what other people are thinking and instead of sharing what they want or what you want, going a step beyond to articulate what they are likely to do next.

11. Toggle.  Move between the big-picture and day-to-day execution to broaden your view.  As you are completing the day-to-day work, can you easily connect the work to the mission and vision?  Do you know the why behind the small decisions?  Similarly, in those conceptual meetings, can you move from the 1,000 feet view to the 100 to understand the next steps and road map that will allow you to ascend?  Can you take a broad idea and create a plan with metrics and benchmarks while keeping the WHY top of mind?

Once you have engaged in strategic thinking, it is important to have time for reflection so you can consolidate the learnings, get clear on your point of view, and communicate your strategy so your boss knows you are a strategic thinker.   Here are two helpful steps for perception management:

1. Get clear on your point of view.  When you have considered and implemented the above approaches, bring a perspective to the table.  Do people know where you stand?  Your leaders want to know what you think, so when you show that you are considering the big-picture and can articulate your views, you can stand out for a promotion.  Beyond just coming up with ideas, it’s even more powerful when you can take the initiative and show you have thought a few steps ahead of how you would implement something and put your ideas into action.  Having good ideas and strategies are only the first step; you also must communicate them and bring people along.

2. Carve out prep time before your meetings.  It can be too easy for us to feel like we will wing the meeting, but it is more powerful when we are deliberate.  Block out 30 minutes on your calendar before essential meetings so you have time to collect your thoughts, and arrange and package your ideas into a coherent vision and direction.  That shows strategic thinking when you are capable of synthesizing information and articulating knowledge concisely and compellingly.  You can take the same approach in emails, when you are talking about completing work, you can offer the WHY behind the work and connect it to the mission and vision. 

Having strategic thinking skills is essential for all people in the organization to develop because you can better deal with uncertainty and complexity.   A common mistake for leaders as they rise through the ranks is that they stay in operational or execution mode and are not doing enough of the strategy work to get to the next phase of their careers.  Using any of these frameworks can not only help you advance but also strengthen your contributions to your team and organization. 

Quote of the day: “Always start at the end before you begin.” Author Robert Kiyosaki

Q: How do you develop your strategic thinking skills?  What are your best practices for being strategic? Comment and share with us; we would love to hear!

The next blog in this series (3 of 3) will focus on thinking and reflecting practices to strengthen your strategic thinking skills

 As a Leadership Coach, I partner with leaders to engage in strategic thinking for them and their teams, contact me to learn more.

How do you like to think strategically?

What is your company strategy? (Strategy series 1/3)

Having a solid strategy can mean the difference between winning and losing, failing and succeeding.  Knowing the stakes, how do you create a good strategy?  What does strategy even mean anyway?

At the company level, Harvard Business Professor Michael Porter defines strategy as a unique and valuable position involving a different set of activities than your competitors or the same activities done in different ways. The Management theorist Henry Mintzberg famously defined strategy as 5 Ps: plan, ploy, pattern, position, and perspective. He explains:

·      The plan helps you attain your objectives to achieve your intended position.

·      The ploy is a new offering that is usually a surprise tactic that competitors would not expect.

·      The pattern is understanding what was implemented before and pulling out useful aspects going forward.

·      The position is your market location and the role you play in relation to your main competitors.

·      The perspective is how your organization sees itself and how various target audiences perceive you.

Generally speaking, strategy is about your intention or the way you pursue the work to further the mission and creatively grow the business in various facets – employee health, customer satisfaction, and revenue growth.   Let’s break down some strategy components:

1. Strategy is about choices.  To do well, a company must choose to do some things great and not others.  So, how do you choose?  Many people like to begin broadly in these four categories to be industry leaders:

·      Product leader - Nike and Apple are product leaders.  They constantly change their designs or shoe technology to be the coolest and most innovative in the market.  It is hard to outdo them in this category.

·      Customer intimacy – This is about creating an incredible experience for the customers where they are entirely taken care of.  You are prepared to jump through hoops for them.  Most big companies can find this challenging, but Nordstrom is an example that offers excellence in this department.  It is easier for smaller companies to do this like coffee shops, where workers know your name and have your order ready for you upon arrival.  Zappos is known for exceptional customer service.  Tony Hsieh shared a story about taking clients out one evening and when they all returned to their rooms, one of them craved a pizza, but room service was closed. Tony suggested they call Zappos and they came through on the request! Although they didn’t deliver themselves, they found a nearby pizza parlor that would.

·      Operational excellence – This is about performing efficiently at scale.  Starbucks and Chipotle have standardized their processes and have a model that can be exported seamlessly.   

·      Low Prices – Cost-effectiveness can be a powerful strategy.  It is part of IKEA’s competitive advantage.  They target young furniture buyers who want style cheaply. 

Roger Martin, named #1 by Thinkers 50 says to know if you have picked a good strategy, follow this rule – “If the opposite of your choice is stupid on its face, you have not chosen.  For example, if you say, our strategy is to be customer-centric or operationally effective or to value our talent, you can perform this test by stating the opposite - Our strategy is to ignore customers entirely.”  If it does not make sense, it cannot work as a strategy because it would be hard to do that and succeed, let alone stay in business.  Maybe regulated monopolies like the DMV can get away with this, but they do not engender much love.  If the opposite of operational effectiveness is inefficiency, then that’s not a choice because it is not a profitable route.

2. Strategy is about trade-offs.  Michael Porter says, “the essence of strategy is choosing what not to do” because you do not have the bandwidth to do it all.  Focusing on 1-2 things per quarter and adding the rest to your future list. Leaders need to know how to say no often.  As Peter Drucker says, “strategy is saying no to the things that you would like to say yes to.”  We can have many good ideas but only so much capacity to execute.  The key is to choose a couple of priorities because when you have too many, your team spins their wheels, and there is no organizing framework since they all need your attention.  Southwest Airlines is an example of a company that makes these strategic tradeoffs.  They offer short-haul, low-cost, point-to-point service between midsize cities and secondary airports in large cities.  They avoid large airports and do not fly great distances. Their frequent departures and low fares attract price-sensitive customers who otherwise travel by bus or car and convenience-oriented travelers who would choose a full-service airline.  They empower their employees at the front desk to make decisions aligned with their priorities (e.g., planes landing on time, cheap prices, and treating customers well).  It’s the reason they do not have milk on their flights because they do not have refrigerators since they have to be repaired when there are breakdowns, and that can lead to late departures. 

3. Strategy is about problem-solving.  What’s the space between the outcomes you're currently achieving and your aspirations?  If you think about the biggest challenge in reducing client churn from 35-15%, what are the fewest battles necessary to win that war?  How do you go about getting to the root of the problem to make sure you are solving the right one?  How do you frame the question for the best solution?

4. Strategy is about simplicity.  There is a myth that strategy needs to be complicated but to be most effective, you want to make it simple - understandable, memorable, and actionable.  Research by Roger Martin supports this point.  He says, “43 percent of managers cannot state their strategy.  When executives are not clear on their strategy, they have to work harder to see their impact on the organization’s direction.”  Moreover, execution does not like complexity.  Leaders who talk about strategy in concepts and cannot make it simple to move it to a specific goal with the fewest number of executable targets will struggle.  As Einstein said, “Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler.” You can start with these simple questions - where are you?  Where do you need to go?  What resources do you need?  What are your options?  Which one is best to prioritize?  What is the easiest workflow process? What’s your timeframe?  What’s your process to reflect and reevaluate?

5. Strategy is about flexibility. You can be clear on your vision and flexible in your strategy. You do not want a strategy that will handcuff you when a pivot is in order so it is important to check in on your strategy. Pay attention to the context and as variables and circumstances require you to update your strategy, be ready. You also may not have gotten it right the first time and that’s ok, you can alter it after your strategy has been tested.

Strategy is an important part of any business and while some people try to make it complicated, it does not have to be.  As Jack Welch said, “In reality, strategy is actually very straightforward.  You pick a general direction and implement like hell.” 

Quote of the day: “A vision without a strategy remains an illusion.” -Author Lee Bolman

Q: What’s your favorite strategy?  What’s your process for formulating your strategy? Comment and share with us, we would love to hear!

The next blog in this series (2/3) will focus on how to develop strategic thinking skills.

 As a Leadership Coach, I partner with leaders to engage in strategic thinking for them and their teams, contact me to learn more.

What does strategy mean to you?

What stage is your team in? ( Team Composition Series 3/3)

Teams go through different phases and stages.  Dr. Bruce Tuckman published his 4-stage model in 1965 – Forming, Storming, Norming, and Performing and added a fifth stage, Adjourning in the 1970s. The theory explains the predictable and evolving formative periods most teams experience.  As a leader, your job is to recognize what stage your team is at and think about the right interventions to move them along the team development continuum to reach peak performance and achieve more than they thought possible.  

Let’s jump into Tuckman’s five stages:

Stage 1: Forming.  When a team first assembles, there can be excitement, they may not be sure how things will turn out but some know it can be a great experience.  People spend time getting to know each other and understanding each other’s best attributes.  Respect is granted where you listen to others and share your thoughts, some may offer some goodwill and trust.

There should be a high dependence on the leader for guidance and direction during this phase.  Instead of being reactive to problems that come your way, the leader has the responsibility to be proactive and help their team think about what systems and processes are needed to build a foundation for their best performance.   

Here are some crucial questions the leader should reflect on and be able to answer to some degree before getting input from the team and co-creating the collective culture and structure:

·      What is the team’s purpose?  Why are we here and what are we meant to do? What is the vision that inspires people to jump out of bed every day to partake? What have our stakeholders commissioned us to do? What value are we depositing into the world?

·      What are the team goals, objectives, and KPIs? How can we turn the purpose and vision into a quarterly roadmap?

·      What are everybody’s roles and responsibilities, and how can we best contribute?  How can we share that information so everybody knows other people’s job descriptions and so they know who to turn to for assistance?

·      What are the expectations and agreements that will govern our best work?  What are the ways to weigh in and offer best practices and processes to enhance communication and coordination? How do we want to create psychological safety so we can take risks and reach peak innovation? You can lay out the best way to handle conflict and the process for decision-making get feedback and collectively agree on what would be best for the team.

·      What are the style differences?   How can we improve our understanding of individual preferences, strengths, and weaknesses, and increase our knowledge of working with different types of people?  This one does not need to be fully developed and can unfold as the team moves through the stages.

Stage 2: Storming.  In this phase, team members begin to show their entire colors, and conflict typically arises as there are clashes between work styles, beliefs, values, relationships, and personalities.  Decision-making is more complicated as people become more comfortable challenging each other and the leader.  As team members vie for positions to establish themselves in relation to other team members, they second guess coworkers and wonder, "I thought I trusted you, but now I'm not so sure."  If progress is not being made, they have more questions and concerns, assert their opinions and compete for power and attention.  If the team is too big, subgroups and cliques form, and there may be power struggles and blaming of others.   If not handled well, many teams do not move beyond this stage; they stay underperforming, and it turns out to be a relatively disappointing experience.

Leaders can play an essential role in pushing the team forward.  They can normalize conflict and seek to resolve it productively instead of shying away from it.   For example, when a co-worker says or does something that's not aligned with the team culture, step in and ask them to explain their approach and how it matches with the team’s purpose or culture.  You can revisit the original agreements about having an open and safe forum to exchange and pressure test ideas, even if not in alignment with others. Leaders can then allow team members the space to express different opinions and “clear the air.”  If you do not put ideas on the table, you cannot do anything about them.  They can establish and reinforce processes for effective communication, efficient meetings, solving team issues, and building trust to get teams to see that solving these interpersonal challenges is worth the investment.  Leaders can coach members to take ownership of the success of the team and help them design the changes they want to see. Leaders can ask how each member wants to be a resource for others’ development.  They can reconfirm the vision and get people excited to focus on critical collective goals where the intensity of the emotional and relationship issues is overshadowed by something way more meaningful that will have a substantial impact.

Stage 3: Norming.  When you understand that conflicts can arise and resolve issues amicably, you get rewarded with a genuinely healthy working relationship in the norming stage.  Roles and responsibilities are clear, accepted, and appreciated.  The team builds on processes and understands effective working styles.  Big decisions are made by group consensus or another more effective method agreed upon by the group. More minor decisions may be delegated to individuals or small, self-organizing teams within the larger group as responsibility and ownership are distributed.  There is a rhythm of addressing issues and appreciating differences and strengths as people work toward a common goal.  The impact is that morale and productivity increase, trust builds, commitment and unity strengthen and care for each other, and the work grows.  There is general respect for each other and the leader.  The team may engage in fun social activities and people are generally set up to do the work that everybody agreed upon.

Leaders can create success in this stage by empowering behaviors that allow people to be on the same page, giving and receiving feedback for development, sharing leadership responsibilities, and managing change collaboratively.  At this stage, groupthink can seep in; there could be the temptation that members could feel that they need to get along to go along because there is the fear of going back to the conflict stage when things were not fabulous.  The leader can be on the lookout for this unhelpful development and invoke processes to draw out multiple perspectives and normalize productive disagreement, leverage the strengths of each, take quick action, settle conflicts, and maintain a positive, productive climate.

Stage 4: Performing.  This is an incredible work experience where you are thriving on multiple levels producing excellent results, and having great relationships; it is a 1 + 1 = 3 type of equation; it's an intoxicating feeling.  The team is more strategically aware; knows clearly why it is doing what it is doing.  They have a high degree of autonomy as they go after the shared vision; they tend to overachieve and collaboratively make decisions with the leader.  Even with a high degree of freedom, they know they can depend on each other at any point.  Disagreements are resolved within the team positively, and necessary changes to processes and structures are made by the team regularly to serve the evolving needs best. They are comfortable asking for help and offering it because it is about the team-first approach, and there is a level of safety where people can bring their authentic selves, both their successes and struggles.

A leader can foster this successful stage by allowing even more flexibility in team roles, so people feel like they are being challenged. Leaders can create future leadership opportunities, offer development and support to help people achieve their career aspirations.  Leaders can leverage the learning and spark additional team creativity to attain new heights as they collectively advance. Leaders can also pay attention to momentum building and stalling moments. Daniel Pink also offers some interesting research about midpoints, which is the phenomenon of how teams tend to lose steam mid-project.  With this knowledge, leaders can offer galvanizing interventions to work with this dynamic to keep the momentum unbroken.

Stage 5: Adjourning.  This was added by Tuckman two years after his initial research.  Adjourning is the team’s break-up, hopefully when the task is completed successfully, its purpose fulfilled; everyone can move on to new things, feeling good about what's been achieved and ready to contribute elevated skills to their next body of work.  From an organizational perspective, recognition of and sensitivity to people's vulnerabilities is helpful, particularly if members have been closely bonded and feel a sense of insecurity or threat from this change.

Leaders can mark the occasion and adequately reflect on all the excellent work capturing each person’s contributions and making them feel proud for being a part of a memorable experience.  They can create hope for the future that they have skills and abilities and effective work practices that they can transfer to their next project.

 As a leader joining a new team, it is useful to find out what stage your team is in because if you enter their high-performing stage and treat them like they are in the forming or storming stage, they will be unhappy. It’s helpful to begin with a lot of listening and observation so you can spot where they are.  You can ask questions such as - what’s happening on the team, where is everybody, what are the best aspects of this team that you want to leverage going forward, what tweaks would you like to make, if any, to do even better work, how can I be most helpful to advance the team?  Instead of thinking you have the right diagnosis, they can tell you what they want without knowing the details and history.  Once having a deeper understanding, you can co-create the work together so all parties have a stake.

These five stages can progress and regress depending on team makeup, leadership, and client work changes.  When that happens, it is helpful to revisit the forming stage, even briefly, so you can put together a clear roadmap that will add eventual speed to the process. Knowing where your team is and how to support them will allow them to do their best work.

Quotes of the day:  Coming together is a beginning, staying together is progress, and working together is a success." – Henry Ford

Q: What stage is your team in?  As a leader, how would you like to support your team?  As a team member, how would you like to contribute? Comment and share with us; we would love to hear!

 As a Leadership and Team Coach, I partner with leaders and teams to cultivate a flourishing team culture, contact me to learn more.

Bruce Tuckman’s Team Model

team types -which ones are needed? ( Team Composition Series 2/3)

In the last blog, we talked about the definition of a team. This blog will focus on the types of teams depending on the degree of interconnectedness – ranging from independent on one side to dependent on the other, and all the shades in between.  Identifying the kind of team you have can help better nurture it in an intentional way to achieve maximum value.

Let’s jump into 3 kinds of teams:

1. Independent Team.  A mainly independent team is where all members can perform the same basic tasks independently. They may be able to help each other, perhaps by offering advice or providing moral support, but everyone’s success is primarily due to their efforts.  It is about getting what you need by yourself.  In the workplace, it could be teams who work independently and get their job done, and at times they can collaborate to enhance their performance, but they do not necessarily have to in order to complete their tasks.

Some sports examples include bowling and track and field.  In bowling, each person is responsible for knocking down their pins, all contributing to the team’s score and purpose of winning, but essentially individuals do not need to be collaborating at the moment to get their job done.  Similarly, in track and field, players can do different events, and while their efforts contribute to the overall result, they do not need to coordinate to do their job.

Similarly, teachers do not need to collaborate with their coworkers to conduct their lessons and maximize student potential.  Of course, closer teamwork can be beneficial because they can share the most effective pedagogical approaches, build stronger lessons that make connections between subjects, and discuss how each student learns best for a customized approach.  It is also helpful to be aligned with coworkers and have similar norms for students to help build a robust school culture, but they can still teach their classes without depending on coworkers.

2. Dependent Team.  This is when the work of one teammate depends on the work of the others.  It’s like putting together a puzzle, each person has a piece, so they need to problem solve and make decisions together, or the puzzle cannot be completed.

In sports, relay and rowing teams are good examples.  If you are running a 4-person relay race and one person decides not to participate, the whole team suffers and likely would not even be able to compete.  Instead, the way for the team to win is for everybody to perform at their best.  In rowing, members are usually at the same skill level and can move at the same pace because of the high degree of coordination and dependability. 

In corporate, I see this a lot with leadership teams.  They need to come together to align on a vision and commit to getting their teams to carry out the mission and vision to meet the needs of the stakeholders.    

3. Interdependent Team.  This is when team members work together to fulfill a goal, have defined tasks and roles, and depend on each other’s efforts to achieve outcomes.  There can be a range of interdependence with dependence on one side of the spectrum and independence on the other.  Some of their work at specific points can require working individually, and other parts can mean working collaboratively.  For high interdependent teams, the work is integrated; none of the members have separate work.

In sports, baseball and football are common examples.  When playing defense in baseball, there is a higher degree of interdependence; the fielders need to coordinate their positions, catches, and throws to prevent baserunners from advancing.  They share information about batter tendencies and adjust their field position in response to that data.  When on offense, if you are first at-bat with nobody on base, there is some independence.  But, that can quickly transform into interdependence when more baserunners hop aboard as there is a degree of unspoken coordination; the trailing runner cannot advance more than the lead runner. Football is similar; when on offense, there is a high degree of interdependence.  The quarterback connects with receivers by throwing the ball to where the player should be, while the other players will run routes to draw out the defense.  When everybody does their jobs, it works well.  On defense, teammates depend on each other to be in the right spots and make the right moves to stop the opponent from advancing.

This is common in cross-functional teams.  For example, developing a new product requires input from the researchers who need to understand the customer’s needs, the engineer who builds the product, the designer who makes the product look good, the marketer who knows how to brand the product, and the salesperson who knows how to sell it.  Getting those people on the same page initially can make a big difference because they each have knowledge that can enhance the overall product.  While they may work independently a good portion of their time, they know how to quickly come together, exchange information, and accomplish a collective purpose.  If you have departments who do not talk to each other, you get disunity and subpar products, you get a dysfunctional team.

So, Which Kinds of Teams Are Best?

While all teams should understand their roles, responsibilities, norms, and agreements, it is helpful to know what the situation demands and the types of teams you may need as they each offer strengths and weaknesses.

Faced with an interdependent task, you need to have a cohesive and highly communicative team that understands that the team goal is primary and trumps any individual agendas.  They know their impact on each other, the actions that build trust, and how to have harmony.  Interconnectedness requires a higher level of coordination, cooperation, knowledge sharing, and quality time to extract each person’s best.  They will have to meet more frequently because one person’s work impacts another’s.  Interdependence is the invisible glue that engages the team and holds them together.  It sparks motivation and energy as they sync up for efficiency and innovation.  As Keith Sawyer describes in Group Genius, “there is a sort of group flow – a state of peak performance that comes from close work, shared commitment to the goals, and pride in the team.”  Moreover, in today’s VUCA world marked by volatility, uncertainty, complexity, and ambiguity, teams see new challenges pop up all the time so they need the creativity, imagination, complexity of knowledge, and skills that no one individual can bring to the team.  The interdependent team coordination is crucial to solving today’s most complex challenges.

If it is a job that does not require close coordination and knowledge sharing because there are independent goals, then independent teams could be the best way to get the work done in the initial stages and then come together at the end to collaborate.  They still operate in a team environment and can check in with each other at any point to gain assistance and offer support, but do not need to be in daily communication because it could distract from their deep work initiatives.  Teams can fail when you give them tasks that could be a better fit for the individual, no need to force blanket collaboration all the time on all functions, which can be counterproductive. It all depends on defining those crucial moments of collision for peak collaboration and then a divide and conquer approach with opportunities to check in with each other along the way to make sure there is the same drive for alignment.

Author Susan Gerke believes that while some teams think that they are independent or interdependent, most teams are dependent because each person’s work is tied to overall outcomes and pay performance.  And if you’re focusing on goals at a team level and rewarding that, teams should understand how to work as a more dependent unit since there is significant reliance on one another.  At times, individual goals can be met as long as it is in service and aligned with the team. For example, you may have a running back in football who is just 100 yards away from a lifetime record.  Sure, you would like to get the ball to them as much as possible, but if the opposition gains strength and has double coverage on the player, the team would abort that goal of helping that individual and do what is best for the entire team to secure the win, and if it happens that he gets the ball and achieves his personal victory, so be it, it is still a win-win.

When you know the mission and vision of the team, you can design the team with the right level of interdependence so you can combine the individual resources into a collective pool that could be allocated strategically to offer the best and most innovative results.  Tapping into the resources of many will position you to solve the hardest challenges better.

Quote of the day: "It is literally true that you can succeed best and quickest by helping others to succeed."  -Napoleon Hill

Q: What kind of team are you?  What do you look for to do your best work?  What level of interdependence do you need?  Comment and share with us, we would love to hear!

[The next blog in this series 3/3 will focus on the stages of teams] 

 As a Leadership and Team Coach, I partner with leaders and teams to cultivate a flourishing team culture, contact me to learn more.

Teams form around a purpose

What Is A Team? (Team Composition Series 1/3)

The word team is frequently used to describe any group of people loosely working together. The term is often evoked even when there are divergent agendas and little reliance on each other.  There are leadership teams, management teams, work teams, cross-functional teams, and more. Depending on the kind of team you are, you can make decisions to determine how to run it for maximum success and to meet the complex business demands in the modern workplace.

A team is not a bunch – a group of people who coexist.  If we find ourselves on the subway with a bunch of people, we are merely occupying the same space; each person is independent of everybody else, some traveling in the same direction and some not, but there is no kind of coordination.  We may not have much in common and are just in the same place at the same time using the same resource.  Of course, if the subway broke down in between platforms for an extensive period, there could be the potential for a team to form as more coordination would have to occur for all people to reach the same goal of getting out safely. 

A team is not a group – a collection of people who can have some common interests but are not aligned toward the same goal.  For example, maybe a leadership coach is working with a group of lawyers in different industries or companies, which can have many overlaps in their practice such as in their experiences, skills, and challenges.  Still, they are not working together to achieve an outcome so there is no need to align.

A team is not a pseudo team, described by Michael West and Joanne Lyubovnikova as “A group of people working in an organization who call themselves or are called by others a team; who have differing accounts of team objectives; whose typical tasks require team members to work alone or in separate dyads towards disparate goals.” There is usually an inability to collaborate effectively and the sum of the team is less than the parts; they could be performing even better independently.

A team, defined by Jon Katzenback, a recognized expert on teams is “A small number of people with complementary skills, who are committed to a common purpose, set of performance goals and shared approach for which they hold each other mutually accountable.” Peter Hawkins, author and expert on teams adds “and which has ways of effectively meeting and communicating that raise morale and alignment, effectively engaging with all the team’s key stakeholder groups and ways that individuals and the team can continually learn and develop.” In other words, real teams consist of a group of people working toward a common purpose and have a degree of interdependence in a shared context.  There is defined membership where they combine resources, competencies, and bandwidth as they carry out their collective mission and achieve outcomes.  They accomplish tasks that are too large or complex to be done by anyone.  A team only forms in response to a purpose and to stakeholder needs and usually operates within a system.

The best teams synergize; they know that the output of a team will be greater than the sum of individual contributions.  They complement each other, collaborate, coordinate, communicate effectively, have team spirit, and subordinate their personal goals to the larger objectives if they are at odds.  There are clear roles, well-defined outcomes, and norms or working agreements for peak performance.  They know why the team exists and have aligned that purpose with the organization, and to a degree, their own.  Ideally, they can connect that mission with having a meaningful and positive impact on others.  Author David Burkus argues that the definition of a great team has three qualities – intellectual diversity (diverse thinkers), psychological safety (the comfort in expressing your ideas), and a purpose or noble cause.  While each team includes different ingredients that make up their success, there are underlining commonalities.  To read more about successful team ingredients, feel free to read my blog on the topic.

Leaders play a tremendous part in the success of a team.  While they have their vision, they know how to collect meaningful input from the members to shape it collectively.  Great teams do not just happen; there has to be a degree of intentionality and thought in the design, purpose, values, and contribution of individual strengths.  Doc Rivers, NBA championship-winning coach and recipient of the NBA Coach of the Year award uses the South African concept Ubuntu to drive and define his team, which means “I am because we are.”   It is the idea that there are no solitary humans because a person is who they are as a result of their interactions with others.  He says, “the better you are, the better I am.”   The best leaders strike a balance in coaching teams for who they are today and who they will be someday and extracting the best from each to advance the team unit as a whole.

When you are building a team, there are many considerations to design the best kinds of teams, which look very different than groups and bunches.  What type of team do you intend to build?  What will be the philosophy that governs your team?  How will you learn the stakeholders’ needs for you to be successful? How will you incentivize your team to collaborate?  These are the kinds of questions that pop up in the formative stages of a team.

Quote of the day: "None of us is as smart as all of us." -Ken Blanchard

Q: What does a team mean to you?  Comment and share with us; we would love to hear!

[The next blog in this series 2/3 will focus on the types of teams]

 As a Leadership and Team Coach, I partner with leaders and teams to cultivate a flourishing team culture, contact me to learn more.

What’s distinct about your team?

Top 8 Tips for Habit Change (Habit Series 7/7)

The previous blogs in this series have covered various topics relating to how habits work and how we can make them work better.  This blog will offer several tips to further optimize your habit changes.

1. Have Systems, not Goals.  Scott Adams, in his book “How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big,” says when you are trying to make changes, it is better to have systems versus goals.  He states how goals can be vague, such as I want to lose 10 pounds, but systems - what you will eat, how you will exercise, what research you will put into your plan, how consistent you will be - will determine the results you want.  Sports coaches understand this distinction, you may have the goal of winning a championship, but it is a system of how you recruit players, run practices, and manage assistant coaches to get you to that result.  Goals are about one moment, such as cleaning my house, but that’s temporary if you do not have a system in place of immediately putting things where they belong.  It is essential to have both –set a goal so you know the direction you are going in and build the system to support your journey.

2. Get a partner.   Sometimes when we are thinking of making changes, it can be easy to talk about it but hard to live.  We are all human with weaknesses and willpower lapses and cannot always do it alone.  Enlisting help, whether a supportive partner or a coach, can help us make sustainable changes.  It is the reason why many people work with personal trainers.  If all we needed were more information on diet and exercise, we would all be walking around super fit, but when we partner with an expert, we are held accountable and can feel more motivated to do the work.

No matter how disciplined you are, you can go further when you go together.  Marshall Goldsmith is one of the top coaches in the business and even he has somebody that he calls every night so he knows he’s doing his ideal behaviors and can be held accountable.  You can make it a two-way street and find a success buddy who wants to devote time to habit changes as there’s nothing more powerful than walking arm in arm with someone to go after your objectives.  If it is the same goal like exercising more, you can take walks and workout classes together and even introduce a little competition to rev the engines.  An accountability buddy allows you to report your goals, share your plans to get there, and help each other with information, connections, and motivation. 

3. Recover from your mistakes.  Let’s say you put in the most incredible systems, but somehow you get pulled off track.  One crazy day in a busy week slams you and you are unable to do your exercise routines.   It’s fine, you are human, the key is to return to the path.  Because some people try to be perfect, when they break their chain, it stays broken, and the next thing you know you have been off your exercise routine for two weeks and now you do not know if you can resume.  The answer is that you can always return at any moment.   Be mindful to prevent a slip from turning into a downward spiral… first, you stop exercising, you feel sluggish, you have low energy at work, are unproductive with your assignments, feel irritable, don’t spend time with your family, and so on. Be patient with yourself, if you fall off the wagon, brush yourself off, and keep going.  Try another strategy, reinforce your commitment, and press on. You got this!

Another reason why people get pulled off track is because they get to a certain level of success and then get too comfortable.  We stop doing what we did to get us there and we slowly degrade like frogs in boiling water, warming so incrementally that they do not realize they are getting cooked.

5. Be quick to eliminate bad habits. A good way to think about habits is to think about cultivating a garden. There will be a variety of flowers, trees, and plants, which are the good habits you will want to nurture and then there will be the weeds, the unwanted habits, which should be ripped out before they grow too large. As Ben Franklin warned, it’s easier to prevent bad habits than to break them. Warren Buffet would agree as he adds “The chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken.” Taking a preventative approach can save you tremendous energy.

6. Permit yourself to break your routine. Routine and consistency are good, but sometimes the things that used to energize us can lose their effects.  In that case, it is helpful to shake things up and interrupt your routines.  Instead of going for a run every day, maybe you take a bike ride.   When you deliberately take a break or challenge yourself with a new activity, it can reenergize your commitment.  Travel is the ultimate activity because it forces you to do so many new things– figuring out how to navigate a city, where to explore, what to eat, who to meet, and so on.

7. Check-in with your habits. It is also important to recognize that sometimes habits have their seasons. Maybe you were intentional about eating oranges every day for 6 months but it is no longer serving you, so you can introduce another habit for another season in your life. Just because you decide to take one thing on, does not mean it is the thing you will do for the entirety of your life. Periodically check in with your habits to make sure it is the right match for where you are in life.

8. Reflect & celebrate.  Evaluate your habits, what is going well, what is not, and what might need to change?  Becoming the best version of yourself requires you to continuously review your behaviors and beliefs so you know you are spending time on the right things based on where you are.  Comedian Chris Rock will test 100 jokes and record which bits went well in his notebook so he can repeat that specific behavior.

Reflections can happen at multiple levels - daily, weekly, monthly, and annual reviews so you can track your most important habits and measure your progress. Here is one way to reflect… on an excel spreadsheet, in the first vertical column, write a list of important things in your life, such as family, friends, and virtues you are cultivating.  Across the top, list the days of the week. At the end of each day, complete the column by writing a simple yes or no.  At the end of the week, review your scores. If you say your family is your top priority but they do not appear in your busy calendar and you have not checked their boxes, that’s valuable data for you to act on. It is only this reflection time that will allow you to discover the inconsistencies.

Don’t forget to stop and take the time to celebrate.  Give yourself new rewards daily, weekly, or monthly.  Read something fun, go for a hike, book a massage, eat the best icecream, or do any preferable activity that will add the benefit of disrupting your routine.

Some change is hard, but when we can create systems, enlist help, reflect, and celebrate our wins, we can make the process a little less difficult.  And if it is still hard despite our best efforts, do them anyway, it will be a road you can travel to success.

Quotes of the day: “All our life is but a mass of habits.”  -William James 

Q: When was the last time you enlisted help to enact positive change in your life?  What worked? Comment and share below, we would love to hear from you!

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to cultivate habits that serve them, contact me to explore this topic further.

What’s your favorite tip for habit change?

Consistency is the secret to changing habits (Habit Series 6/7)

The best way for your habit change to take root is to be consistent with your behaviors.  Even when you cannot see the benefits, big dividends will be eventually paid when you put a system in place to follow. 

When you make the slightest adjustments to your daily routine, it can alter your life.  Let’s say you want to exercise more, and you start with 10 minutes a day, it does not sound like a lot, but it adds up.  Jerry Seinfeld, one of the most successful comedians of all time, brought a level of consistency to his daily work that most of us would envy. He said the way to be a better comic was to create better jokes, and the way to create better jokes was to write every day.  He used a wall calendar that had a whole year on one page hung in a prominent spot.  For each day he writes, he puts a big red X over the day.  After a few days, he would have a chain that would keep growing, the goal is not to break the chain. This method of daily tracking is hugely beneficial for many, but it doesn’t work for all because if you find yourself staring at blank spots that you missed, you can begin to feel bad about your inability to follow a plan and start to get demoralized and give up. Decide if tracking works for you.

Consistency is a competitive advantage.  None of us get where we want to overnight, it is a disciplined process, over time of small intentional steps.  Jim Rohn says, “what simple to do is also simple not to do.”  Successful people are willing to do what others are not.  They schedule time in their calendar every day for their habits.  Practice allows you to rewire your brain and create new mental maps on how to think and behave.  As Tony Robbins says, “Knowledge is not power… it’s potential power.  Execution will trump knowledge any day.”  It is like a light switch, we have to turn it on to enjoy the effects.

Here are two tips to help with consistency:

1. Control your mornings and evenings.  An excellent way to have more control over your day is to have a non-negotiable morning and evening routine so your most important habits are done at the beginning or end of the day, depending on the time that matches your best energy.  A million things can spring up during the day that you may have to react to, but designing the beginning or the end of your day will allow for that protected habit time and fewer if any interruptions.

2. Log your progress. The most effective form of motivation for habit change is progress.  Each small win feeds your desire, and even if the results take longer to see, you can visualize the work you put in. At age 20, Ben Franklin carried a small booklet and used it to track 13 personal virtues and goals such as avoiding wasting time and trifling conversation and would open his book and record his progress.  Following the habit creates a satisfying feeling and a desire to repeat the behavior.  Research shows that those who kept a daily food log were twice as likely to lose weight. It keeps us honest because sometimes we have a distorted view of what we do until we see the paper that puts things into a more realistic light.  The key is to focus on the process and the progress of whom you are becoming as you move toward your destination.  Measurement is useful when it guides you and adds context to a larger picture, not when it consumes you and stresses you out.

Progress leads to momentum,  one of the most influential and enigmatic forces of success.  Newton’s first law states that objects at rest tend to stay at rest unless impacted by an outside force and objects in motion stay in motion unless something stops the momentum.  It’s why couch potatoes can feel like they are in a rut for a while and why the rich get richer, and the happy people get happier.

These steps will lead to the compound effect.  When you are consistent, control your time, and log your progress, you ignite the miracle of the compound effect.  In the book by the same title, Darren Hardy defines the compound effect as “Changes that seem small and unimportant at first, but will compound into remarkable results if you are willing to stick with them for years.”

Even when you do not see the changes, the benefits are delayed.  James Clear offers a striking ice cube metaphor.  He says, “Imagine an ice cube as a room heats up in 1-degree increments. 26... 27...28... to 31 and still nothing has happened. Then at 32, the ice begins to melt.  A 1-degree shift, seemingly no different from the previous ones, but this one unlocked a huge shift.”  The hard work you do is never being wasted, just stored. It’s natural to get frustrated with running for a month and not seeing results, but like all things, you need to give it time and the amount of time can vary from one person to the next.

Habits can compound for or against you.  When you are consistently doing your disciplines and tracking your progress, you will be on a growth path, even if it is not noticeable at first, it will yield massive long-term results.  If you choose the status quo or feed negative behaviors, you will accrue a deficit.  It’s a multiplying effect in whichever direction - and, you get to choose.

Quotes of the day: “ I will win, not immediately but definitely.” -Anonymous 

“The secret to success is found in your daily routine.” -Author John Maxwell

Q:  How do you support your best habits?  How do you log your progress?   Comment and share below, we would love to hear from you! 

[The next blog 7/7 will focus on maintaining systems for habit change]

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to cultivate habits that serve them, contact me to explore this topic further.

How do you track your progress on habit change?

When it comes to habit change, Start Small (Habit Series 5/7)

When you are thinking about starting a new habit, it seems like resistance has other ideas.  Partly because some people devise an elaborate plan and create grandiose expectations.  No wonder it is hard to follow habits when the bar is already fixed so impossibly high before you have even begun.  When we start small, pick one, and jump in, substantial things happen.

BJ Fogg, Director of the Persuasive Technology Lab has spent decades thinking about modifying behavior.  One of his key insights is that when we are looking to establish habits, we want to begin with tiny changes. He often uses the example of flossing. You want to start with one tooth. When you set the mental bar so low, you will likely begin and continue until the whole job is done.  In contrast, by designing a higher goal like flossing for 5 minutes 3 times a day, our brains immediately start finding ways to hack our well-intentioned plans.  It is essential to gain some early wins before you expand. 

In thinking about starting small, here are some steps to consider:

1. Define your new habit.  It should be specific, granular, and accomplishable in a minute or less.  The micro-habit is much harder to find an excuse not to do it.  For example, if you want to build a habit to think strategically first thing in the morning, do not just say, “I plan to do some strategic thinking.”  Get more specific, “ I plan to walk into my office and sit with a sheet of paper and pen at my desk for a minute.”  The same technique works for writing, if you are having trouble writing a book, commit to one sentence or 100 words a day.  When you write so little, more will flow out; the initial hurdle of beginning is the hardest.  After, momentum kicks in, taking you for the ride. Also, we have different motivations on different days. If your bar is only to write one sentence a day, you can fulfill that minimum on tough days, but if you are feeling high energy, you can tackle harder goals and write pages, but you do not have to. Einstein offers a good reminder - “everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler.”

2. Pick one habit at a time.  Leo Babauta, the author of ZenHabits, uses this strategy.  He said, “We’ve all had those moments when you want to declare, ‘I will change starting today! I want to go to bed earlier, eat less sugar, eat more vegetables, exercise more, be more generous, call my mother regularly, stop checking Facebook obsessively, hug my children, write a book, and declutter the house.’ And if you try to do all of that at once, you end up failing at everything.  But when you devote your energy to just one change, you have more success.  Once one part is habitual, you can move on to the next shift.  Greg McKeown, the author of Essentialism, would agree.  He states that you can only be doing one thing at a time so what is the most important thing you want to be working on?  It is a simple, yet profound concept.  If we do not eliminate, we become overcommitted and our energy will be dispersed instead of concentrated in one area.

3. Calibrate expectations.  When people get started with a new endeavor, they almost always overdo it.  Their ambition leads them to think big and set stretch goals. But high achievers with good intentions can fall short.  When we tempter our expectations and take tiny steps consistently, we can radically improve our lives instead of mustering up giant leaps.  If you decide to work out two hours a day for five days a week, it may be hard to continue that pace.   If you do not get into something you can reliably maintain, you will not do it at all or give up quickly.  We win when we take the right steps day in and day out, but when we do too much too soon, we see obstacles and falter.  Instead of beginning with a 2-mile jog, start with a 5-minute walk and build up.  Your outcomes are determined by your moment-to-moment choices until they become your habits.

According to one study, there is a reason why 25% of people abandoned their New Year’s resolution within the same month because some change is hard.  We are adamant about change initially and then we lose steam and sometimes try to do too much too quickly.  It is easy to overestimate the importance of one defining moment and underestimate making small improvements daily.

4. Preserve and maintain.  When you are creating new habits, it is crucial to keep a system of preservation in place.  You may decide to work more so you can hit some financial goals, but what systems are you putting in place to preserve your health or protect your family time?  People tend to go hard on their goals and have them consume their life that they leave little time for other things.  It’s another reason why starting small helps, so you can keep the other aspects of your life intact that feed you energy.

5. Start Now.  You may be wondering – when is the best time to start my habit?  Maybe during the winter when you will not be out as much and not be as tempted.  Perhaps Jan. 1st as a New Year’s resolution?  On a Monday?  Any day but the weekend?  The answer – any of those options work, just start!  As the Chinese Proverb goes, “the best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.” And, if you’re saying that you already began too late, well, that might be just another tired script in your mind, it’s never too late.  As Albert Camus reminds us, “those who lack the courage will always find a philosophy to justify it.”

We can approach habit change as this complicated process or we can tackle it microscopically.  It is the tiniest sparks that can ignite the most remarkable and most sustainable changes.  Let’s start somewhere, anywhere, and let momentum do its work.

Quote of the Day: “We exaggerate yesterday, overestimate tomorrow, underestimate today.” -John Maxwell.

Q:  What’s the first habit you would like to create?  When will you start? Comment and share below, we would love to hear from you!

[The next blog in this series 6/7 will focus on the power of consistency in habit change]

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to cultivate habits that serve them, contact me to explore this topic further.

Now is always the best time to start

The Subtle Power of your Environment Influencing Your Habits (Habit Series 4/7)

Your surroundings may be impacting your habits more than you think and more than you want, so when you start controlling your setting, you can begin to have progress on the long-awaited changes in your life.

Executive Coach Marshall Goldsmith said, “Most of us go through life unaware of how our environment shapes our behavior.”  When you have a conflict between the situation (having cookies in your kitchen in an accessible spot) and your willpower (choosing not to eat them), the environment overpowers your will every time. Those cookies have no chance, especially if they are chocolate chip walnut from Levain’s, the #1 bakery in NYC.  If they are hidden, you will likely not eat them.  Better yet, if they are not even in the house, you will not be tempted.  Physical and visual distance impacts your choices.  If you replace the sweets with fruit and keep them reachable, you will more likely grab that.  To eat healthier, stock your fridge with excellent options.  The key to changing your habits is organizing your environment in a way that makes it easy and sets you up for success. 

The power of the environment is further illustrated in Richard Thaler’s Nudge, he talks about the concept of choice architecture which is the process of organizing information on a page or arranging the items in a physical environment in such a way that influences decisions.  Anne Thorndike, a Physician at a Boston hospital designed a 6-month study to alter the cafeteria’s choice architecture.  Fridges next to cashiers only had soda so store managers added water and placed baskets of water next to food stations around the room.  Over the next 3 months, soda sales dropped by 11.4%, and water sales increased by 25.8%.  The presence of water changed people’s behavior. 

Your social situation also plays a role.  Jim Rohn said we become the combined average of the people we hang around the most.  Those people dominate the types of things we talk about and the activities that we do.  If we spend time with friends who enjoy going to bars, we can be more tempted to overdrink.  If we spend time with avid readers, we are more likely to be influenced in that direction by reading or talking about books. When we hang out with people where the norm is to have good habits, we will make better decisions with our time and set ourselves up for success. 

As French philosopher, Michel de Montaigne wrote - “The customs and practices of life in society sweep us along.”  Friends and family provide an invisible peer pressure force that pulls us in that direction.   Do you work at an office where staying until 5 is standard because people value family and personal development time?  You will be less likely to overwork and violate that shared expectation.  Join a group where your desired behavior is the norm.  I did when I connected to a philosophy group a few years ago where I met so many people who were just as jazzed about personal development as I am.  It felt fantastic to nerd out openly on topics that I would not have the opportunity to share with my other friend groups.  Successful businesswoman Kathy Ireland said there are two types of people – anchors and engines, anchors weigh you down while engines believe in you, support you, and propel you forward.  Who are the anchors and engines in your life? 

Professor Edwards Deming noted, “A bad system will beat a good person every time.”  Many of us become successful or not depending on the world around us and how we relate to it.  If somebody returns from rehab and is plugged into the same environment with the same triggers and social influences, they are likely to find change difficult.  Instead, habits are easy when they fit into your life, and the environment allows for it.  So, what environmental cues are steering your behavior either in the direction of beneficial change or throwing you off track?  Make a list of your environmental triggers that are either helping or hurting you to raise your awareness so you can take deliberate action.

Your physical and social environments may be having a much bigger impact on your choices than you initially thought.  If you want to have a healthy lifestyle, allow your physical environment to reflect your intentions.  If you are going to focus on growth and development, surround yourself with people who share your values.  Be intentional about your choices for the best habits to take root.

Quote of the day: “The key to behavioral change is to pass behavioral control to the environment.” -Author Paul Gibbons

Q: How can you set your physical and social environment up that would optimize your success?  Comment and share below, we would love to hear from you! 

[The next blog in this series 5/7 will focus on the importance of small steps towards habit change]

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to cultivate habits that serve them, contact me to explore this topic further.

Do you know how your environment impacts your decisions?

Your Personality Wiring is Impacting Your Habits (Habit Series 3/7)

The key to setting habits is to know yourself so you can customize your plan for change.  Not everybody is the same, what makes sense for some may not work for others, what seems like a hill to you may look like a mountain to me, so it is essential to experiment and find the approach that works best for you. 

One thing you can do is cast a wide net to get exposed to many ideas and then drill down on what you want to implement.  For example, you may spend time exploring all of your worst habits, then pick 1-3 to do some deeper reflection and double down on changes you want to make with those.  It is like deciding you want to be a better listener, you may briefly explore 10 books, but choose 2-3 to learn everything from and extrapolate main points, drown out the rest, and be intentional about applying those insights.

Before you jump into implementing habit changes, it could be helpful to explore your natural dispositions.  Here are a few variables to consider: 

1. Factor in your personality style.  Some people may have specific traits that are more conducive to particular approaches.  For example, you may be high in openness, and can more easily experiment with changes to satisfy your curiosity.   You may be high in consciousnesses and may want to follow the habit with a rigid structure instead of a more flexible approach. Are you somebody that can make the change by yourself, or would you do much better with a partner?  For example, we all know we should work out, but some choose to pay a personal trainer because we are more inclined to follow through when there is somebody else holding us accountable.

Beware of the information-action fallacy, which is the assumption that new information will lead to new action. You can read all the books on weight loss, but it does not mean you will enact any of the learnings, we are all human and need help, and some of us find it essential to the process. Executive Coach Marshall Goldsmith knows just how hard it is to change, that is why he checks in with his accountable buddy at the end of every day to reflect on his intentions.

2. Consider different approaches.  Some people prefer a phased approach v. an absolute approach.  With the former, you decide you want to give up coffee so, initially, you have coffee some days and decaf others, then after a while, you will have decaf coffee, and then decaf green tea until you break your coffee connection.  With the latter, you may think it is better to stop cold turkey. 

Indeed, not everybody is wired the same way.  Some people think it is helpful to change a lot of big habits all at once.  In his book Reverse Heart Disease, Cardiologist Dean Ornish shares a study that shows what can happen with dramatic lifestyle changes.  Some of his patients found it easier to say goodbye to all of their bad habits and embrace new ones and, in less than a month, they saw dramatic health benefits.  This is more the exception. Other research shows that when people tried one new behavior in one area, many of them were more successful than the people who tried to change a few new behaviors in many areas. This is especially true when it relates to what Charles Dughigg labels a keystone habit, that one thing you change which has a ripple effect on so many other things, which become easier to change. What approach compliments your personality?

3. Understand your response to change.  When you are first thinking about going for a run, it can cause nervousness, but after a while, you get used to it, and it becomes quite familiar.  Changes can be painful and uncomfortable initially, but eventually enjoyable.  The discomfort is only temporary because humans are incredible at adapting.  How well do you know your comfort level with the cycle of change? What’s your approach to dealing with change?

We all have natural dispositions that we can tap into to help with lasting behavior change.  When we consider our personality styles, strategic approaches, and comfort level with the change cycle, we can chart the best course of action that works for us.

Quote of the day: “People do not decide their futures, they decide their habits, and their habits decide their futures.”  -F.M. Alexander

Q:  What are your best and worst habits?  How do you maintain the good ones and how might you experiment with discarding the bad ones? Comment and share below, we would love to hear from you! 

[The next blog in this series 4/7 will focus on the impact of the environment on habit change]

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to cultivate habits that serve them, contact me to explore this topic further.

How does your personality influence your decisions

When it Comes to Habit Changes, Start with Self-Awareness (Habit Series 2/7)

How aware are you of your habits?  Which ones are the good ones, which ones are the bad ones?   If you could change one habit, which one would it be?  What’s been the main obstacle to achieving the change thus far? What do you need to finally succeed? To alter our behavior, it’s helpful to begin with self-awareness.

Many of our performance failures can be attributed to a lack of self-awareness.  Once we start tracking our habits and making them apparent, we can take meaningful action.  Practicing mindfulness – a consistent and focused awareness will help to identify the initial cue that ignites the habit loop so we are better informed to disrupt the process.  Carl Jung said, “Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life, and you will call it fate.”  For example, you may be working on not giving unsolicited advice, yet you realize you mostly do it when one direct report asks you what you think.  That is your cue.  Or maybe you notice that in the late afternoon after completing a big task and feeling a little bored, you go for the dessert in the break room or in your kitchen.  Those slower moments can be your trigger for sweets. 

Here are some steps to take to be more aware of your habits:

1. Make a list.  When you are thinking about creating or breaking habits, it is first helpful to make a list and organize them into two columns – good and bad.  It is insufficient to only have the items in your mind, writing them down and seeing your words reflected back to you will help start the process of awareness because we cannot address that which goes unnoticed or is not fully captured.  As Peter Drucker would say, “your biggest challenge is defining what your work is.”  What is the landscape of your habits, and where is the work that needs to be done?  Once you have clarity, you can take the next step.

2. Assess your habits.  If you are unsure if a practice is a bad one – for example, you feel like you watch the right amount of tv, you will want to track your behavior for a couple of weeks to gain an accurate picture.  You may think it is the right amount because you watch it after dinner for about 1 hour but failed to factor in the 15 mins. in the morning while getting ready, the 15 mins. during lunchtime, and the occasional times you need a break in the late afternoon.  Surprise… it is closer to an hour and fifteen minutes a day, which adds up to more than you may want to dedicate.  Do you know how many hours you devote to nonessential work like Facebook or reading gossip or trivial news? These numbers are important to know because as Author James Redfield shares, “where intention goes, energy flows.” 

3. Decide to add or subtract.  You can choose a habit you would like to add to your life, like eating vegetables every day, or you can select a pattern to stop, like giving up candy.  Montel Williams followed the Add-In Principle, he says, it’s not what you take out of your diet, it’s what you put in.  A simple reframe – “Today, I’m going to have a salad, steamed vegetables, and fresh figs” allows him to keep his attention on the things he can do, instead of focusing on what he has to sacrifice.  Some research on neuroplasticity shows that the brain is continuously creating new wiring, so when you lay the trackwork for a new behavior by practicing it, it becomes more robust over time.  When we stop giving attention to the bad habit, the connection in our minds becomes much weaker. 

Be sure to choose carefully.  Most people waste effort on things that are not going to change, they may say they want to work less, but it is clear that their drive for financial success is more potent than their desire for balance.  Choose the habits that you are ready to tackle and are eager to move the needle on because we only have scarce resources.  When you laser focus on one thing at a time, small changes can equate to giant leaps forward. 

4. Make it a part of your identity.  According to James Clear, the first step in thinking about habits is to create identity-based habits.  He offers a concentric circle with 3 rungs, the inner is your identity, the middle is the process, and the outer is the outcome.  Most people set habits because they start with the outside and move inside. 

For example:

·      Outside-In: I want to lose 10 pounds (outcome), so I will exercise a few times per week (process), and then I will be skinny (identity).

·      Inside-Out: I want to be an active, fit person (identity), so I will exercise daily (process), and this will lead to weight loss (outcome). 

·      Outside-In: I want to improve my relationship (outcome), so I’ll say positive things every day (process), and I will be somebody who is in a good relationship (identity).

·      Inside-Out: I want to be a great partner (identity), so I’m going to say positive things every day, leading to an improved relationship (outcome).

If you set goals to change habits that do not align with your identity, it can cause tension.  In an article in SUCCESS, Daniel Hardy notes, “Psychologists tell us that nothing creates more internal stress and trauma than what you’re doing on the outside (actions & behaviors) is incongruent with your values on the inside.”  If you set specific financial goals but that takes you away from your #1 value of family, that will cause strife.  The best way to change who you are is to decide the type of person you want to be and then set the behaviors that serve your vision and prove it to yourself with small wins and consistency. That’s living in alignment and it is a freeing experience.

5. Set an implementation intention.  To build a new habit, establish an implementation intention or a premeditated plan.  For example:

·      When I get asked for advice at a meeting, I will get my team involved before I weigh in by saying: “I’d love to hear what the rest of the team thinks before I share my thoughts.”

·      When I feel bored, I will get up, move around, drink some water, and then grab carrots instead of dessert to snack on. 

·      It is a specific plan of action instead of a foggy idea like I want to be better at not giving unsolicited advice or cutting out desserts.  If you are going to start a meditation practice, instead of saying, I will meditate more or I will meditate every morning, you can get even more specific by saying I will meditate for three minutes every morning in my living room after I brush my teeth.

6. Habit Stack. One of the best ways to build a new habit is to identify the habits that you already do and then stack a new behavior on top.  For example:

·      After my run (current behavior), I will do 5 pushups (new habit). 

·      After I eat lunch (current behavior), I will have a piece of fruit (new habit). 

·      After I sit down for dinner, I will say one thing I am grateful for before eating. 

·      After I get into bed, I will kiss my partner and share words of appreciation.

You can also add the desired behavior to something you already do that will enhance the fun. I discovered this when I started listening to audiobooks several years ago during my boring commute, and suddenly, I started looking forward to the activity because I knew I would have quality learning time.   The same is true for when I go for runs, I listen to podcasts and love the time I spend soaking up information. 

The journey of behavior change begins with understanding yourself.  When you have a clearer picture of your habits, you can decide which ones you would like to change so you can make them a part of your identity.  Setting an implementation intention and habit stacking can make that change process easier.

Quote of the day: “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.”  Historian Will Durant in distilling Aristotle’s sentiment on the topic.

Q: Who do you want to be?  What habits do you want to help you get there?  Comment and share below, we would love to hear from you. 

[The next blog in this series 3/7 will focus on the role your personality plays in habit formation]

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to cultivate habits that serve them, contact me to explore this topic further.

What are your Identity-based Habits?

A Closer Look at Habits (Habit Series 1/7)

The quality of our habits makes up the richness of our lives.  Habits are rituals or behaviors that we perform automatically.  The good ones, such as daily flossing, exercise, and mindful eating, contribute to a healthier life.  In contrast, the less envious ones like consuming junk food, binging on Netflix, and skipping workouts can detract from our potential. 

These vital mental shortcuts allow us to glide more efficiently throughout our day.  A lot of what we do is mindless; we are constantly reacting to situations without having the time to conduct elaborate mental trials.  One paper published by a Duke University researcher in 2006 found that more than 40% of the actions people performed each day were not actual decisions, but habits.  Without them, we would be overwhelmed and simply nonfunctional at times because we are bombarded with millions of bits of information and lack the time and cognitive resources to decipher all of the data.  By not thinking about routine actions such as how we are going to brush our teeth, what breakfast we will have, and how we will commute to work, allows us to conserve energy on recurring events so we can use our thinking power for more significant decisions.  

How long does it take to change a habit?

The research on this question is varied.  In the preface to his 1960 book Psycho-cybernetics, Dr. Maxwell Maltz, a plastic surgeon turned psychologist, wrote: “It usually requires a minimum of about 21 days to effect any perceptible change in a mental image.”  According to recent research by Phillippa Lally, the typical average is about 66 days.  But in that study, the range was wide, anywhere from 18-254 days because it depended on the kind of habit.  Drinking 8 glasses of water each day is much easier than going for a daily run, which could take closer to 7-8 months to cement for some people.  In reality, habit work never stops because if we do not maintain them, we lose the routine and the benefit.

Other variables can impact the timeline, such as how long the habit has been ingrained in our mind, how compelling the reason for the change, how big the payoff will be, how dire the consequences if we stick with the status quo, how positive the emotions connected to the behavior change, and the surrounding circumstances.   For example, if we have witnessed a friend die of lung cancer, that may prompt us to quit smoking immediately. If we feel incredible going for a daily walk and we start to notice progress shortly thereafter, we are more likely to implant that habit into our lives.

How do habits work?

In two common frameworks, Charles Duhigg in “The Power of Habit,” describes a habit loop consisting of 3 elements, while James Clear’s “Atomic Habits” explains 4 steps in the process by subdividing the second step. 

Here is how they explain it:

1. Cue.  A trigger that initiates the behavior because you are conditioned to notice the reward.

2. Routine.  The behavior you use in response to the cue.  James Clear subdivides the routine into the craving (the motivational force behind the habit) and the response (the actual practice you perform).

3. Reward.  The satisfying feeling you get when you address the cue.

When putting it together, it looks like this:  You wake up (cue), you want to feel alert (craving), you drink coffee (response), you satisfy your craving of feeling alert (reward).  Therefore, drinking coffee becomes associated with waking up.

Habit loops are important because our brains would shut down due to the overwhelm of the everyday minutiae without them.  When we break a habit into its parts, we can understand them better and zoom in to a specific area to triage. 

Knowing our habits can improve the quality of our lives.  Instead of running on autopilot and accruing behaviors that may not serve us, we can be more deliberate.  When we build good habits, we create freedom for the things that we want to do the most.   

Quote of the day:  “For the first 30 years of your life, you make your habits.  For the last 30 years of your life, your habits make you.”  -Hindu Saying  [This was reportedly a favorite of Steve Jobs who sent it out to friends on invitations to his 30th birthday party].

Q:  What cue or trigger starts one of your habits?   What can you do to interrupt the loop?  Comment and share below, we would love to hear from you!

[The next blog in this series 2/7 will focus on increasing your awareness to change your habits better]

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to cultivate habits that serve them, contact me to explore this topic further.

When was the last time you examined your habits?

Strategies to Shatter Cognitive Distortions (Mindset Series 2/2)

In the last article, we explored 12 common cognitive distortions or ways of thinking that can be detrimental to our happiness and productivity.  Experts such as Aaron Beck and David Burns argue that we do not need to resign ourselves to this type of thinking; instead, there are numerous ways to identify, challenge, minimize, or erase these misrepresentations from our mind chatter.

Here are some steps we can take to work against these distortions or unproductive mindsets:

1. Learn how to recognize the cognitive distortion and label it.  Now that you are familiar with some common ones, when you start thinking along those lines, you will be able to spot what is happening earlier.   When you notice the distortion, write it down. For example, suppose somebody cancels a meeting. In that case, you may immediately overgeneralize – “this always happens to me, I can’t catch a break” or you may label  - “I’m a total loser, of course, they don’t want to give me the time of day” or catastrophize – “I am never going to get my shot with this decisionmaker.” Spot yourself falling into the pattern so you can get out of it. You have to name it to tame it.

 2. Look at the evidence for and against your thoughts.  You have probably racked up support for your thoughts, but what about exploring the other side? Ask yourself, “what might somebody say who disagrees with you?” “How can I devise five reasons why this is not true.” “What if I was wrong?” You can connect with a friend and invite them to disprove your unsubstantiated theories. Just because you have a thought does not mean it is true so invite scrutiny to test your thinking.

3. Run a cost-benefit analysis. What is the cost of believing this unhelpful theory? Perhaps anxiety, self-consciousness, and excessive rumination.  How about the benefits?  Maybe protecting yourself from a potentially adverse outcome.  Which is worth more?  Write down your thoughts and get some distance so you can better see the holes in your logic.

4. Reframe. Perhaps you have a big presentation looming and you start to indulge your negative thinking and let it run loose. You get really anxious and determine you are going to do terribly because public speaking is your Achilles’ heel. Remind yourself that you can choose your response. You can transform your state of psychological arousal from anxiety into excitement. What if you viewed this presentation through opportunity googles and not a fearful lens? Things can go well - believing that is more productive!

5. Assume positive intent. When we judge people or assume the worst, we can feel bad about ourselves. Instead, if we make an effort to interpret other people’s statements in their best or most reasonable form, we can inculcate ourselves from some of that draining energy.

6. Avoid polarity thinking. Instead of thinking in black or white terms, think in grays. In which context is one thing more true? For example, instead of maintaining emotional intelligence (EQ) is always better than intelligence, perhaps EQ is more valuable in areas dealing with customer service and less valuable dealing with data. You can generate as many different interpretations to break the binary thinking.

Many people may not be realizing that they are engaging in thinking patterns that bring them emotional pain.  When we can surface those harmful thoughts, we are better equipped to fight against them, and live healthier and happier lives.  Allow your mind to usher in the productive and healing vibes that will allow you to thrive in the way you can.

Thought of the day: “The mind is its own place, and in itself, can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven” - John Milton

Q: What thinking behavior do you notice doing the most?  How do you break that cycle of destructive thinking? Comment and share below, we would love to hear from you!

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to explore their blind spots around their mindsets and assumptions to better serve their actions, contact me to explore this topic further.

How can you foster positive thoughts?

Thinking Behaviors That Are Sabotaging You (Mindset Series 1/2)

Have you ever stopped to think about how your thoughts may be helping or hindering you?  Is the way we perceive the world always spot on, or could we be way off and not even be aware?

Psychologists Aaron Beck and David Burns researched these questions and concluded that sometimes the way we observe the world is erroneous because we have negative biases that we inherited from our ancestors who were equipped to constantly lookout for dangers.  These flaws in our thinking are known as cognitive distortions - exaggerated or irrational thoughts that can do us great harm.  For example, we can view the world through a negative filter and fail to see any positives.  This thinking pattern is so habitual that we do not even realize what is going on and conclude that it is simply the way we are. But, does it have to be?

Here are 12 common irrational thought patterns that simply are not serving us:

1. Catastrophizing is when we blow circumstances out of proportion and think about something unbearable happening that we will not be able to endure.  Maybe we made a mistake on a project and now think about the worst-case scenario, such as getting kicked off the team, fired, and possibly rendered forever unemployable! 

2. Emotional Reasoning is when we interpret reality based on how we feel in the moment; our moods determine how we see the world, and if we feel something, it must be true.  We may be feeling sad about our work performance after a poor presentation given in a meeting and then conclude the job is just not working out and we are not meant to be in this field.

3. Overgeneralizing is when we perceive a global pattern of negativity based on a single incident.  Failing once can translate into believing we fail all the time. The clue that you may be overgeneralizing is when you use the words, “always,” “never,” “every,” or “all.” 

4. Dichotomous Thinking is about having only two ways of thinking – all or nothing; feeling like the victim or the oppressor; you either win or lose; something is either good or bad.  Saying, “I get rejected by everybody” or “it was a complete waste of time,” shows an inability to see the hundreds of interpretations in between. This type of thinking keeps you rigid and stifles your creativity and problem-solving abilities.   

5. Mind Reading is about assuming you know what people are thinking without having sufficient evidence of their thoughts. “They think I’m a lazy contributor on this team.” We jump to conclusions because we think we know what the other person is believing.  We could be presenting on a video call and one of the team members yawn so we conclude that they must think we are boring or do not respect me, but in reality, they were up all night from their new baby and their tired expression has nothing to do with us.

6. Labeling is assigning negative traits to yourself or others where it becomes part of your identity.  You may engage in forgetful behavior where you fail to do a part of a project and condemn yourself to be an absent-minded and disorganized person. This can have massive negative impacts. For example, thinking you are an incompetent person can cause a looping effect where it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Over time you will develop schemas about yourself and your prospects and become the inept person you carelessly labeled yourself to be. Engaging in a few isolating behaviors is not the same as your character.

7. Attachment is thinking you “have to” or “must do” something because it is part of your identity.  When we adhere to only one vision of ourselves and believe that possibly this one person or this one job can only make me happy, we close ourselves to many other options that could make us even more fulfilled.  Sure, living in NYC can mean a blissful life, but so can living in other cities (I think).  You may have your heart set on being a teacher because you like helping others, but there are multiple other ways you can achieve those same ends, such as being a coach, a facilitator, working in learning and development in an organization, being a mentor, volunteering, and so on. We cannot be sure unless we approach the situation with an open mind and welcome other possibilities.

8. Negative Filtering is when you focus exclusively on the negatives and seldom notice the positives.  Thinking about all the people who do not like you at your company, instead of the ones who do. You may get 6 pieces of positive praise on your presentation and 1 piece of constructive criticism and your mind zeros in on the negative and forgets the positive. How do you take a moment to look at the whole picture and really take in the good?

9. Discounting Positives is when you claim that the positive things you or others do are trivial or do not really count because of various circumstances.  For example, disregarding your best friend’s compliments of you because that is what friends are supposed to do. Or, if success came easy then it does not really mean much because you did not have to work hard for it.

10. Blaming is about focusing on others as the source of your negative feelings, maybe you blame your parents for how you turned out or you hold your boss culpable for your unhappiness and refuse to take responsibility for changing.  It is common to think, “if this person would just quit their full-time job of making me miserable, all my woes would disappear.” What purpose is blaming serving? How do you start with yourself and your contributions?

11. Always Being Right is the belief that we must always be correct and will fight to prove that we are.  In this mindset, we fail to consider the other person’s feelings in the discussion, and it becomes hard to sustain a relationship because nobody wants to be in constant competition. Meir Ezra notes, “The more a person needs to be right, the less certain [they are].” What is behind that desire to be right? What do you win? More importantly, what is lost?

12. Personalizing is when we attribute a disproportionate amount of the blame to ourselves for negative events, and we fail to see the role others play in causing certain events.  “The partnership ended because I failed.” Yet, you do not take into account their part.

These types of twisted thinking can interfere with our intellectual development and harm our mental health. Epictetus stated, “What really frightens and dismays us is not external events themselves, but how we think about them.  It is not things that disturb us, but our interpretation of their significance.”  When we can identify our thought patterns, we can decide what we want to do about them. We have more choices than we realize.

Quote of the day: “The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation, but your thoughts about it. Be aware of the thoughts you are thinking.”  ― Eckhart Tolle 

Q: Which one of these distortions do you most often use, and when do you use them?  Comment and share below, we would love to hear from you!

[The next blog 2/2 will focus on strategies for correcting our counterproductive thought patterns.]

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to explore their blind spots around their mindsets and assumptions to better serve their actions, contact me to explore this topic further.

Manage your mind for more happiness