Characteristics of an Authentic Leader (Authenticity Series 2/4 )

In the previous blog, we delved into the concept of authenticity and its benefits in leadership.   This article will explore the key characteristics of being an authentic leader.

Here are a few traits of authentic leaders:

1. Vulnerability.  Authentic leaders are unafraid to share their thoughts, feelings, and experiences honestly. They willingly expose themselves to emotional challenges but do so without compromising their credibility.   For example, as a leader, you do not want to say to your team, “I want to do this job, but it’s scary, and I don’t know how.”  That candor can backfire, and you can lose trust with people who want and need a confident leader.  Instead, you can say, “I may not have all the answers, but I want to enlist your support as we move forward together.  That approach creates team cohesion and invites the active participation of others.

2. Integrity. This is when your words are consistent with your deeds; otherwise, followers will never accept you as authentic.  Great leaders embody their beliefs and live them unfailingly.  As Ralph Waldo Emerson puts it, “what you do speaks so loudly, I can’t hear what you’re saying.” Words are superficial and prove who you want to be, while actions show who you are.

3. Be transparent and truthful.  As Dostoyevsky wisely observed, “Above all do not lie to yourself, the man who lies to himself and listens to his own lie, comes to a point where he cannot distinguish the truth within him, or around him, so loses respect for himself and others.  And having no respect, he seizes to live.” People are more trusting when transparency and congruency of who you are on the inside are the same as how you portray yourself to the world; there is no secrecy or mystery.  When you operate with dishonesty, it can have a detrimental impact.  Nietzsche’s mentor, Ludwig Feuerbach said, “I would rather be a devil in alliance with the truth than an angel in alliance with falsehood.” Speaking truthfully allows for a more stress-free existence.

4. Self-awareness.  Authenticity begins with self-awareness: knowing who you are—your values, emotions, and competencies, as well as how others perceive them, are better equipped for success.  A study at the Center for Creative Leadership found that self-awareness is the primary quality that distinguishes successful leaders.  Moreover, research shows companies that employ professionals who exhibit high levels of self-awareness tend to perform better financially.  By looking inward and engaging in self-assessment, we can gain a deeper understanding of our emotions, beliefs, and strengths and improve our perception of those held by others. Regular reflection practice is important, whether through meditation, prayer, mindfulness, thinking, writing, or taking long walks to clear one’s head.  This allows us to step back from the whirlwind and set aside the preoccupation with task lists so the urgent does not take precedence over the important aspects of our lives.   Also, we can ensure alignment with our values and a deeper understanding of how we live our lives and engage with the world around us.  The more we know ourselves, the more authentic we can be.

5. Discipline.  Being an authentic leader requires more than just building self-awareness—we need to put it into practice, which requires discipline.  Making it a point to get feedback on our behaviors and being intentional about what we want to practice will help us.

6. Confidence and humility.  Having self-confidence and being comfortable in our skin are essential.  Knowing where we come from and who we are, and knowing how to use our backgrounds to build rapport with others. There is humility in connecting with all people.  Albert Einstein once said, “I speak to everyone in the same way, whether he is the garbageman or the university president.”  That statement reflects Einstein’s comfort with himself and his ability to be consistent in his various interactions.

7. Mission-driven & inspirational.  Knowing your deeply held crucibles and true north will help you stay on track so you can lead yourself authentically.  Similarly, a deep and abiding commitment to a company mission is integral to authentic leadership and business success.  According to a recent survey by EY and Harvard Business Review Analytic Services, 89% of executives said a sense of collective purpose drives employee engagement, and 84% said it leads to tremendous success in transformational efforts.  Some companies discover their mission early and others stumble upon it, but embracing a purpose will help with authenticity because it keeps you focused.  When you help your followers believe the mission is worthy, they will fight for you. 

6. Commitment to self-improvement.  To become more effective at motivating and guiding others, authentic leaders need to first focus on bettering themselves.  “Authentic leaders begin with the will and commitment within to work on themselves,” says Harvard Professor Nancy Koehn.  Abraham Maslow endorses the concept of individuals striving for self-actualization, which is becoming more complete by pursuing personal growth and peak experiences and realizing their potential. 

7. Balancing your internal understanding with your external feedback.  Leaders go on an inner journey of understanding who they are and what they believe and then matching that with their actions.  They also go on an outer trip, realizing that those actions have implications and will invite feedback from others.

We need a combination of listening to others’ opinions and having a strong enough understanding of who we are and what we want to be the final arbiters.  In Robert Keagan’s stages of adult development, self-authoring is about defining who we are, instead of listening to others’ descriptions of us.  We can distinguish the opinions of others from our thoughts and have an internal guide.  The next level of advancement is self-transforming - where your sense of self is not tied to a particular identity or role but is constantly created through exploration.  It is similar to the Buddhist concept of the evolving self.  In the words of E.E. Cummings “to be nobody but yourself in a world that is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else - means to fight the greatest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.”  When you do not trust a leader it’s because there’s a gap between what they espouse and what they do.

Authentic Leadership means different things to different people.  While there are some common denominators, it is more about showing up in a way that lives your values and makes a positive difference in the lives of others.

Quotes of the day: “You can only find out what you actually believe (rather than what you think you believe) by watching how you act.” - Jordan Peterson

“Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is youer than you. - Dr. Seuss

Q: What characteristics do you think are most important for developing your authenticity as a leader?  Comment and share with us, we would love to hear!

The next blog in this series 3/4 will focus on how to be an authentic leader. 

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to explore what authentic leadership means to them and develop their style, contact me to explore this topic further.

Clear Expectations Are the Foundation for Remote Work Success (remote series 2/11)

Clear expectations can make or break a remote team.  Anytime there are changes to the work, or the context has shifted, there will always be an initial lack of clarity followed by unclear or unmet expectations.  This can cause a lot of stress as people are not realizing what they have to do and may even be duplicating efforts.  Clear expectations lead to greater confidence and trust in your work and less conflict, rework, wasted energy, and micromanagement; it is the fertile ground for successful remote work.

As a manager, you can do many things to create an incredible remote work environment for your team.   Here are some categories to cover for setting clear expectations:

1. Define the team.  If you’re starting a new team from the ground, or if you have inherited a team, be clear from the beginning about who is on the team and who is not, as well as the adjacent and dependent teams.  All good teams have a purpose and vision so there is alignment and a compelling reason to unite and rally around.  Additionally, you need to define the OKRs, goals, outcomes, tasks, the rationale for why the work matters, the big picture behind the work, and co-create team values that will guide the work.  When team members can answer why they are here to do what they do and the impact they will have, they will be more engaged. 

2. Define clear roles and responsibilities.  Now that you’ve all agreed on your team’s purpose and vision, ensure you are all on the same page regarding everybody’s roles and responsibilities.  For example, what specific tasks or perspectives do you expect each team member to contribute?  Because team members may not understand why they’ve been chosen, schedule a meeting to share why each member was named to the team, each person’s unique background and valuable skillset, and clarify each member’s role.  Share a game plan for how your team should interact with each other.  Creating a team charter can help bring organization and introspection to your team, especially when geographically dispersed, so they always know the direction and can remain on track with their high performance. 

3. Establish team norms or ways of working.  In different companies and cultures, routine processes often differ widely, which confuses team members.  How will you work together?  What are the ways you will interact with each other?  What are the values and behaviors that we all can expect?  Team leaders should establish norms and provide training for best practices such as meeting formats, use of technologies and communication, and processes for decision-making and conflict.

4. Set Communication Norms.  This is essential to make sure we are collaborating effectively and getting the work done.  What is your communication strategy to keep everybody connected and doing great work?  How many weekly formal or informal connections will you have?  What are the guidelines around daily needs?  How do team members set commitment-based deadlines so there is no need for follow-ups?  What kinds of digital tools will you use and for what purposes?  Teams often amass tools but no discussion on how those tools are used.  Sometimes zoom becomes the de facto for everything, even when sharing an update can better be done over email.  Remote working offers a great opportunity to co-create which tools will work best based on their purposes. 

You can develop a communication charter and gain agreement on how communication will happen, what kind of messages will be exchanged, and what channels will be utilized with examples and non-examples   After establishing those processes, you can gently remind the person who may be using the right tool in the right way based on the charter.  So much conflict happens due to unclear expectations around communication.   

Here is a list of tools with some possible purposes that might be helpful for your team for the communication component of the charter.

4A. Instant messenger.  Slack is a popular remote tool, especially for direct messaging.  This is best done for rapid communication and iteration without a glut of unwieldy threads like in email.  Some channels can be set up to relate to specific topics or projects.  There can also be non-work-related channels as a way to connect with others.  For example, you can have a water cooler challenge to learn about when it is people’s birthdays or what they did over the weekend. You can have a channel for introductions for when new teams join, and they can offer a video intro so you can quickly learn people’s stories.

4B. Email.  It can be used to provide more extensive information and have a record of the communication and share weekly updates or summaries of what everyone is working on to ensure alignment.  Most teams do not talk about the guidelines around emails.  For example, in the TO line will be those who need to respond, and in the CC line are those who need to be updated.  Instruct others not to reply all when it is not necessary, so it keeps people focused on their productivity unless there are important exceptions like a decision needs to be made and you want all voices included.  In that case, share that information and give them a window to weigh in before you move forward with the decision.  When an email chain gets too long, start by summarizing critical points before weighing in and creating a new thread when the topic has evolved with a different focus.   These may sound like trivial things, but being on the same page around communication norms and creating a frictionless experience will make the work much easier and faster.

4C. Video meetings.  Zoom is a popular tool for getting people together in real-time to discuss projects and have a back-and-forth to hash out details.  Other tools include Microsoft Team, Google Duo, and Webex.  In your charter, you can specify how and when you use video and the guidelines for success, such as when the cameras are on and the best ways to interact.  At GitHub, they do not have presentations in their meetings because they are only for interaction.  When a new team member tries to present, another team member jumps in to enforce the norm, and that’s how their meeting purpose remains intact.   If there is no discussion on these norms, you cannot expect people to be great team members.

4D. Phone calls.  If there are a few back and forth on instant messenger or emailing and still more to hash out, it can be best to jump on the phone to discuss the issue in real-time.

4E. Document hub.  Where do you store critical documents and project information?  Who is responsible for keeping that information organized and updated?  How can it be accessed outside the firewalls?  This allows people to quickly complete their work when there is a centralized location to get what they need.

4F. Define synchronous and asynchronous work.  Maybe you have organized your tools into broader categories of synchronous and asynchronous work based on the purpose.  For example, some teams will use asynchronous tools when work needs to be done in real-time such as brainstorming and problem-solving.  Using asynchronous work can be used for sharing info, giving status updates, adding ideas to a document, or chiming in on a proposal with a more extended deadline.  The advantage of this approach is that you can catch those people who either cannot attend a meeting or do not have an invite.  You can make it more inclusive and open it up to many voices to contribute their ideas and gain more visibility and possibly recognition.  It also leverages flexibility for times that best serve them depending on their energy levels and personal commitments.  The early risers can add comments at the beginning of the day when they do their best work, and the night owls can contribute at the end of the day for their ideal time. 

5. Define response time and deadlines.  What are the expectations around response times, should emails be answered within 24 hours or three days?  Should people respond when they have received a message by saying, “messaged received, thanks,” or is no response necessary to reduce clutter? How about the word quickly, what does it mean?  We could all have different ideas.  It could mean 2 hours, 1 day, within a couple of days, or sometime this week, depending on who is interpreting the message and their position in the company.  When you stay away from vague terms, it offers more clarity.  A great way to do that is to include deadlines, “please respond by tomorrow 5 pm est. so the client can have their answer in the morning as promised.” 

6. Define work availability and standard meeting hours.  For some, the work-from-home experience has blurred boundaries between personal and professional obligations, so as a manager, it is essential to discuss work schedules with each team member to respect their time.  If you know the morning time is for your family, and you will not be logging on until a specific time, share that upfront.  If you know you do your best work in the evening and will be sending emails after 11:00 pm or on weekends, share that just because you are sending a message that is convenient for you, your expectation is that they do not respond until their work hours.  These clear boundaries help maintain positive relationships and a healthy culture where people can comfortably focus on their work and not have to work around the clock, not have their performance measured by how quickly they respond, not get burned out, and not have to expend unnecessary energy thinking about their communication.  Clear boundaries can help teams work together better and especially overcome time zone differences.  For meetings, provide optimal times to overlap early and late time zones and have a predictable window.  If there is no convenient time, you can have a rotation system, one month that favors one coast and another month that favors the other.

Great teams can be set up to thrive when there are clear expectations on the ways of work, including a communication strategy.  It will enable people to spend more time on the work and less on figuring out the best approaches to navigate interpersonal dynamics.   As a leader, the best thing you can do for your people is to take the time to set this foundation for masterful work to be built.

Quote of the day: “Treat a person as they are, and they will remain as is. Treat a person as they can and should be, and they will become as they can and should be.”  -Author Stephen Covey 

Q:  How do you set clear and high expectations?   Comment and share below; we would love to hear from you!

The next blog in this series 3/11 will focus on building community remotely.

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to create enjoyable remote work experiences for themselves and their teams, contact me to explore this topic further.

How do you set clear expectations?

Common Pitfalls To Avoid When Managing Up (Manage Up Series 6/6 )

The last article explored the type of leader you want to be while you are managing up.  This article will cover some approaches you might be tempted to take but are more helpful to avoid.

Let’s explore what not to do:

1. Don’t bad mouth your boss.  While your frustrations may be valid, you will lose credibility when you complain to others.   Plus, by talking poorly about your boss to your Direct Reports, you normalize that negative dynamic on your team and that gossip contributes to a toxic culture.  Be a proactive leader who aims to improve the situation and not just a complainer who passes responsibility onto others.

2. Don’t criticize publicly.  Do not aim to embarrass your boss in front of others.  Disagree with your boss privately and in a calm voice.  Your job is to make your boss look good and build credibility for them that will ultimately enhance your department, not to score points at their expense.

3. Do not cast blame.  Upper management is just as human as you and can make bad decisions.  Instead of blaming and focusing on the past, address the issue and be intentional about what you want to be different in the future to avoid this from happening again.

4. Do not share when angry.  When you operate from this place of anger and resentment, your reptile brain takes over and clouds your judgment from making smart and strategic choices.  Take a reset and aim to take time to see different perspectives and replace the anger with empathy.  Stephen Covey would urge, “seek first to understand then be understood.” Put yourself in your boss’ shoes.  What are their biggest challenges, and how would they like to be treated?  This perspective will enable you to make stronger decisions for the best win-win outcomes.

5. Do not assume your boss knows all the details.  You may know the ins and outs of your team and your work, but if your boss is overseeing a few teams and is in charge of 100+ people, it could be hard to have all the specifics at their fingertips.  Instead, if you could get good at communicating at the conceptual level and build stories around crucial points, your message will resonate more strongly.   

6. Do not take it personally.  Just because your boss has not adopted your solutions does not mean they dislike you.  The same movies can get glowing reviews by the New York Times and slammed by the LA Times due to their subjective nature.  If your boss denies your request to handle the budget even though you have overseen much bigger budgets previously, you may think it is a personal attack.  When you take a step back, do you notice that they operate like that with other people, not just you?   Zoom out to see the bigger picture before rushing to conclusions.

When all else fails, decide to make peace

If you feel like you have tried everything, that your manager is aware and not making any changes or getting better, that can be a stifling experience.  Many organizations still promote people because of their technical success rather than people management skills.  To compound the problem, many new managers receive little or no training before jumping into their new roles.  The main reason why people leave companies is because of their manager.  One sign that it might be time to make peace with the situation and exit is if your manager is harming your health.  A study by the American Psychological Association found that 75% of Americans say their “boss is the most stressful part of their workday.”  If you are experiencing mental unrest by losing sleep, having chronic stress, or spending more time thinking about your boss, it’s time to go.  If you are struggling emotionally and seeing your self-esteem plummet and determine it is a toxic environment, that’s an unmistakable sign that it’s time to move on to the next role or job.

Give yourself the permission to make a career change and fight your fear of quitting.  Some people might not have the option to have a gap in their work, but there is no need to suffer indefinitely.  You usually have more options than you initially realize, you can have informational interviews with your peers and aim to transfer internally to a better team, or line up a role outside the company.  When you make a change, be sure to capture the learnings and what you would do differently next time, so you do not recreate the circumstances you were escaping.  If nothing else, by managing up, you will learn what type of manager you want to be and what kind you want to avoid.

Getting good at managing up takes time.  While it can be tempting to react by blaming and criticizing to get short-term wins, it is more helpful to take a step back and play the long game by focusing on who you want to be as a leader regardless of the circumstances. 

Quote of the day: “We never know which lives we influence, or when, or why.” -Stephen King

Q:  What is one approach to managing up that you have taken that was an utter failure?  What would you do differently next time?  Comment and share below; we would love to hear from you!

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to sharpen their managing up skills, contact me to explore this topic further.

How not to manage up

Your Leadership Style of Managing Up Matters (Manage Up Series 5/6)

Many things may be out of your control when managing up, but what is in your purview is the type of leader you want to be while aiming to make positive changes. In the book, Influence Without Authority, Dan Olsen talks about when communicating up, success depends on 60% substance and 40% style, so controlling your content and delivery will go a long way to achieving your outcome.

Here are some aspects to think about to manage up successfully:

1. Focus on what you can influence, and accept what you can’t.  It can be helpful to accept that sometimes we cannot change senior leadership, we can only change our behavior and be the leaders we wish we had.  Embrace the practices that you espouse.  For example, if you feel like your manager’s team purpose is non-existent and already pointed out that observation, you can offer your interpretation of the team’s purpose and operate on that view until otherwise told. 

2. Acknowledge their authority.  Ultimately, the person in power will probably make the final decision, so recognize that. You might say, “I know you’ll make the call here, would you be open to hearing some of my thoughts?”  This approach can show respect and offer a reminder of the choices available.  

3. Avoid judgments, share facts. When you express concerns, stay away from judgmental words such as “short-sighted” or “hasty” that might set off your manager and has the potential to be taken personally.  Sharing facts and examples will help you make your case much better.  For example, instead of saying, “I think that first-quarter deadline is naïve,” you can say, “We’ve tried four projects like this in the past, and we were able to do two in a similar time, but those were special circumstances.  What has changed or needs to change to deliver this work in the same time period?” You can call attention to the reality of the situation and be future-focused in thinking through how we can make this happen.

 4. Share disagreements humbly.  Even though your opinion might be well-informed and well-researched, it is still an opinion so talk tentatively where you leave room for the other person to weigh in.  Instead of saying “If we set an end-of-quarter deadline, we’ll never make it,” you might offer, “In my opinion, based on where we are now, I do not see how we will make that deadline.” You can also use phrases like, “I’m thinking aloud here.” This will leave room for dialogue, and it shows your curiosity about other perspectives.   You can even ask for permission to share your disagreements.  “I know we seem to be moving toward a first-quarter commitment here, I have reasons to think that it will not work. I’d like to lay out my reasoning.  Would that be OK?”  This gives the person choices and allows them to opt out.  You can further invite them to respond by asking them, “what might be missing from this assessment?”

5. Approach with inquiry.  If your manager has made a decision that has impacted your work, you can lead with open-ended questions such as, “I would love to understand the rationale for this decision, can you tell me what went into this?  Assumptions are counterproductive, share your thinking and genuinely seek to understand their perspective and what they are trying to get done.  It is helpful to assume positive intent because you only see one piece of the picture, meanwhile they have a more expansive view based on their leadership team meetings and discussions on what is coming down the pike.  They could also have stressors that you do not see or fully understand based on where you sit in the company.  

6. Pick your battles.  If it comes to stylistic differences, give your boss what they want.  If they prefer PowerPoint, but you prefer google slides, instead of spending energy arguing on small things, defer to their preferences.  Strive to win the big ones and not waste energy and psychological capital on the more minor points.

7. View your boss as your customer.  You may feel frustrated that you cannot get your job done because you are working on your boss’ items.  It is good to check in with yourself because your priority is your boss.’  How would your mindset be different if you saw your boss as your customer and you were working on satisfying their plans? 

8. Ask for their advice.  If you have determined that your boss has a “closed mind” about something, you can signal your openness by asking for their advice.  Adam Grant offers this example. “Let’s say you want your leader to take mental health seriously, you can use this phrasing, ‘I heard from many people that they are struggling with mental health, which can affect their well-being and I know you care about building a community here.  I want people to feel that they are cared about so I’m trying to think about how to do a better job supporting people, I’m not sure what to do next, but I know you are brilliant at getting things done and driving change.  Would you be willing to help with these cultural changes?’”  People like to feel included and genuine flattery can go a long way.  Plus, it is less threatening when you approach your comments not trying to make the person wrong and show that you have a superior way but are open to learning from the leader or co-creating something better together. You come across as an advocate and not an adversary.

Managing up involves both art and science to be successful.  You want to have the right content to share, as well as an effective delivery.  Using facts and inquiry, approaching disagreements humbly, and seeking true partnership can get you off to a great start.

Quote of the day: “One of the best ways to influence people is to make them feel important. Most people enjoy those rare moments when others make them feel important.  It is one of the deepest human desires.” -Roy T. Bennett.

Q:  What style do others use to manage up that you see as most effective?  Which is the least effective?  Comment and share below; we would love to hear from you!

[The next blog in this series 6/6 will focus on pitfalls to avoid when managing up]

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to sharpen their managing up skills, contact me to explore this topic further.

What is your leadership style when managing up?

Common Scenarios Where Managing Up Is Needed (Manage Up Series 4/6 )

In the last article, we covered managing up to pitch a project.  This blog will focus on many other situations where managing up can come in handy.

Let’s jump into a few common scenarios and approaches for managing up:

1. If you receive additional work unaligned with the priorities.  If you have been given an assignment that you cannot see the value in or the connection to the bigger strategic vision, you can ask questions to get clarity.  How do you see this new idea fitting in with our current goals?  If we take on this new initiative, our capacity will be reduced, we may need to drop or delay another, in that case; which one would you be willing to deprioritize?  Depending on your boss’ style, if you think it is overloading to have them select from open-ended options, you can suggest one to deprioritize to make it easier.  If you prefer to delay, you can say, “Is this idea something we need to implement now, or could it be considered for the next quarter/year?  By laying out how pursuing a new idea will impact other priorities, you can help your boss assess what makes the most sense from a strategic perspective.

2. If you receive vague work.  You can take steps to elicit more thoughtful contributions by asking questions to prompt more critical thinking.  Tell me how you see that working?  What would you like the outcomes to be so we can get the best results possible?  What does success look like?  Are there examples of things you have seen that you like and want to include?  These prompts encourage the leader to expand on their ideas to add more definition to make your work easier.

3. If you disagree with your boss on a topic.  You can be forward-thinking and ask, how would you prefer me to handle this the next time this comes up?  If no answer is provided, you can offer your thought process of how you would handle it and invite your boss to comment on your plan so you can test to see that you are on the same wavelength and make the necessary adjustments. This way, you can create predictable and effective ways of working.

4. If your manager is acting as a bottleneck to your work.   If your work process is slowed because you are waiting on your boss’ approval for the next project, you can say, “I know hitting the deadline on this project is a priority for you, in order not to delay the release of this work, here are the two things I would need from you by this date.  Do you see any obstacles with that timeline?”  Let me know how I can make any adjustments to keep us on track with achieving this priority. 

5. If your manager is doing things that hurt their reputation.  You can say, “I don’t know if you’re intending to come off like this, but here’s how you’re being perceived, I have some thoughts on how I can help with that if you are interested.”  Most leaders want to hear this news especially if it is broached in a respectful and trusting manner.

6. If you suspect incompetence.  Try and diagnose the issue and figure out exactly how the incompetence shows up.  Do they lack experience?  Do they have poor emotional intelligence?  Is their decision-making shaky?  Do they not hold people accountable?  Is it incompetence or just a different approach?  If you can pinpoint and categorize the problem, you and your team can create targeted strategies to address the deficiency and better manage up. 

7. If your manager is micromanaging.  Learn to see if it is just happening with you or is common with other members.  Suppose it is prevalent and causing delays in getting the work done and negatively impacting the organization.  In that case, it is worth speaking up to make changes at a more systematic level rather than changing the style with just you.  You can share your understanding of the expectations and see if they are on the same page this way you can focus more on the outcomes rather than the activities and methods used to achieve those results.

8. If your role is ambiguous.  Be proactive.  Many Directs want their boss to define their job for them, but you are missing out on the opportunity to craft your job.  If you have the chance to create your scope and how it advances the mission and purpose, lay the first stake, and then ask what they would add.  You can say, “Here is what I think success looks like, what is your version, and what would you contribute”?  Here are the skillsets and capabilities I am honing for this job and my development plan, what else should I consider if my goal is to get to the Director level so I can set more of the creative strategic direction? Communicate what you need to be successful in terms of timely information, access, guidance, and resources.  You can use “If-Then Statements,” If I am going to do this, then I need these three things in place to be successful, how do you see this best working? 

9. If your one-on-ones are not useful.  Instead of merely providing status updates, include strategic issues. Suggest ideas on promoting your team for more visibility within your company or discuss process improvements.   Be sure you prepare an agenda to make the best use of your time together.  They will access your thoughtfulness and be more inclined to hear your suggestions.

10. If you feel like your manager is not giving you valuable feedback on your performance.  You can ask, what can I do or stop doing that would improve my performance?  What would make it easier for you to work with me?  Embrace the discomfort, after you ask that question, pause and do not be the next person to respond.  Listen with the intent to understand, not to respond.  You do not have to agree with the feedback, but it can be helpful to hear it.  Check for understanding by saying, “This is what I hear you saying, if I were to change x, y, and z, it would impact the team in a, b, or c ways?  What have I gotten right and what am I missing?” To ensure the alignment, you can even follow up with an email with the key takeaways and next steps.

11. If you are not getting feedback on a project.  If your boss always says, everything is great, go you.  You can say, can I get your advice on X, if you were driving my research, what would be top of mind for you?  Here is my goal for the next week or two to advance this project, I would love your guidance on whether I identified the right goals and how best to achieve them.  What obstacles should I be looking out for?  Annie McKee founder of Teleos Leadership Institute offers to say something like, “I want to do a good job and achieve my goals, and I need your help to do that.”  Be specific about what you want: their input on a particular piece of work, an introduction to another colleague, their permission to reach out to a client, etc.  If they cannot help, suggest an alternative and help them solve the problem, you can ask them if they can ask one of your peers for input or an introduction.  When you change your questions, you can more likely change the responses you are getting.

12. If you want your manager’s feedback on your overall development. You can share what you are doing to work on your growth goals, “What I am struggling with personally is how to make sure all people have a voice in the room and are heard, sometimes I get excited, and that enthusiasm makes it hard for others to get their voice in.  I want to run a flip meeting where I listen instead of sharing.  Do you think people would like that, or would it be a deer in headlights situation?  What suggestions do you have to ensure this is done well or that I succeed?”  You make it much easier for your leader to weigh in on areas that matter to you when you through out a statement or idea in which to react.

13. Take time to signal what works for you.  When you share with your leader what they do well or what works for you, you set them up to repeat that behavior.  For example, you might say, “I really liked when you made that email introduction, it made my work go so much faster, and I would welcome additional opportunities like that to advance future work.”  Formulating clarity in your requests will yield much better results.

Learning the skill of managing up in a variety of situations is critical to maintaining a great relationship with your boss and in the advancement of the goals of the organization. It is a muscle that we can all build with the right intention.

Quote of the day:  “Request, don't complain. Inside every complaint is a request. Find it and make it.” -Mary Abbajay, 

Q:  What is the hardest situation for you to manage up?  What makes it so hard? Comment and share below; we would love to hear from you!

[The next blog in this series 5/6 will focus on your style of managing up]

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to sharpen their managing up skills, contact me to explore this topic further.

The Art of Managing Up

Approaches to managing up for a project (Manage Up Series 3/6 )

How often have you had a great idea that you wanted to pitch to your manager but pulled the plug because you believed it would get rejected?  Perhaps your idea could have brought massive benefits to the team and the organization, but you were convinced that your boss would miss the value.  Great managers provide forums for you to share and disagree.  But we do not always get to choose the people we work for.  When we can strengthen our skills of managing up, we can better lead for impact.

To increase your effectiveness in pitching a project, here are aspects to consider:

1. Bring a first draft plan and co-create.  When you are pitching a project idea, talk about the challenge being addressed, possible solutions, pros and cons of each, your recommendation, and how that solution ties into the bigger picture and the company goals and vision.  Co-create by asking your boss what they would add to your idea to improve its value.  If you are sensing they are opposed to it, you can ask – do you see any reasons why this may not work?  You can ask for their biggest objections they or another might have and if those were addressed, do they see any reason why the project should not go forward then?

2. Tackle the costs head on.  Having a handle on the costs will help you anticipate their possible rejections and prepare for them.  If you do not share them, they will likely be presented for you, instead, you can say, “here are the costs, and here is why I see them worth the benefit.”  Every organization has limited resources, time, and energy; accepting your idea may mean the rejection of another idea that someone else believes is wonderful so having that broader view will be important to making your case.

3. Share potential risks.  When you can brainstorm and analyze potential risks for new projects, categorize whether it is high or low, and share your analysis, you show your boss that you are thinking strategically, especially when you include recommended risk mitigation strategies and backup plans.  They will know that you put in considerable thought and will be more receptive to hearing your approach.   

4. Depict the positive impact beyond your team.  When presenting an idea, be sure to tie it to a positive impact.  Peter Drucker said, “ideas that make no positive impact are meaningless data.”  You are a small piece in the mosaic that your boss is weaving.  When influencing up, focus on the impact of the decision on the overall corporation.  In most cases, the needs of the department are clearly aligned with the company directly, and in other cases, this connection is not so obvious.  Be clear on making that link and do not assume it is automatically seen. Your best wins will relate to a larger goal and not just be about achieving your objectives because if your boss is helping just you, they may be disadvantaging another teammate and the resources they may need. 

5. Show success examples.  Point to examples used by other teams and how you mimic those efforts and processes for the best results.  You can even factor in the customizations you have made to better fit with the intricacies of your team.

6. Reduce workload.  The best recommendations take work off people’s plates.  If you happen to put work on, what can you do to minimize it?  Can you own the scheduling and logistics or volunteer to present the work at the meeting? How can you make it easy for your boss to say yes and show that it will not add extensive work?

There is an art to managing up.  When you can utilize critical thinking skills in presenting your idea, explaining pros and cons, and offering your recommendation, you make it easy for your manager to join you as a collaborative partner to endorse your project. 

Quote of the day: “Real control is influencing someone to the point that [they] believe [their] choices are [their] own.” – G.R. Morris

Q:  How do you pitch your projects for the greatest success?  What has worked and what hasn’t? Comment and share below, we would love to hear from you!

[The next blog in this series 4/6 will focus on numerous managing up scenarios and the best approaches to take]

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to sharpen their managing up skills, contact me to explore this topic further. 

What works for you in managing up?

We All Need to Manage Up (Manage Up Series 1/6)

It is quite common to have a different perspective from our managers and want to find effective ways to speak up to alter outcomes.  Toeing the line between skillfully influencing regardless of your position and not overstepping in a way that disrespects your leader and damages your reputation can be tricky. When we can hone the skill of managing up, we can make a positive difference in our teams and in our organizations.

Harvard Business School Professor John Kotter defines managing up as the process of consciously working with your superior to obtain the best possible results for you, your boss, and the company.  It is a way of customizing your work style to best suit your managers for optimum collective success.  It can also refer to your tactics to build a strong relationship with your boss to make work easier.  Sue Shellenbarger in the Wall Street Journal writes, "Managing up, or building smooth, productive relationships with higher-ups, requires understanding and adapting to your boss’s communication and decision-making style.”  Clearly, the approach you take to manage up matters.

Mastering this skill has copious benefits.  You can effectively shape the agenda by better advocating for what you want, asking for resources, and promoting your team’s successes.  The organization benefits as well.  When you have a strong relationship with your manager and know a good method to be heard, you can achieve more win-wins.  Instead of contributing to a culture of silence where people do not voice their views, you can create a conduit for great ideas to see the light of day.  Organizations want people who can vigorously campaign on behalf of their team with excellent intentions to impact productivity, morale, and retention positively.

Choosing when to speak up is not always easy and straightforward.  Here are some situations that could be helpful to chime in:

1. When it is at the cost of the company’s mission and integrity.  If something is happening that is damaging the company’s reputation internally or externally, it can be essential to get involved.  If you know that corners are being cut and there is a negative impact on customers or other stakeholders, your manager will want to know this.

2. When your motives are genuine.  If you have already checked in with yourself and ruled out jealousy or other less envious motives, and it is really about the benefit to the team, organization, or stakeholders, it is a good time to manage up to share constructive concerns collaboratively.

3. When you have established trust and credibility.  When you have shown yourself to be a dependable person that delivers consistent, timely, and excellent quality work, you will be in a good position to manage up.  If you are not a model of what you seek, your message will be harder to convey and be heard. This reminds me of Jordan Peterson’s rule 6: set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world.  While I disagree with the word perfect, the underlining sentiment of being an example of what you are trying to change is powerful.   Nobody wants to listen to somebody who cannot do the thing they are advocating.

4. When there are massive communication gaps.  You may have assumptions that your boss has a view of you that is inaccurate.  You may want to check in, clear the air, and frame the perception that more precisely depicts who you are instead of them filling in the gaps so you can speak up and align on a shared reality. I had a client who was working on a massive project, culminating in a pivotal stakeholder meeting where a decision had to be made. When the boss viewed the invite list, she said the list looked random and did not understand why some attendees were present.  My client wanted to take a moment to zoom out and inform her leader of the broader picture, that she had been talking to all those stakeholders regularly and had an excellent explanation for each person’s attendance.  Having that conversation to loop her boss in was essential because while they may have initially thought my client was careless in their selection, they were, in fact, deliberate. 

5. When it is for the leader’s benefit.  Business management expert Patrick Lencioni advocates managing up to benefit the leader.  He said, “do not expect that the manager is leading exactly the way they want.”  He shared a story of when a direct report came to him as a great example of managing up.  Lencioni promoted somebody who was not team-oriented, which violated one of the company values.  So, the direct report went to Lencioni and said, I know you have a lot on your plate, but I noticed an inconsistency that I wanted to share and learn more about the reasoning behind the decision. You talk about teamwork being important but just promoted the least teamwork-focused person, so I think to address the disconnection, we either should change what we believe or move him to another place where he would be a better fit.  Lencioni shared that he was happy to have that blind spot bought to his attention and believed that if you only hear about frustrations when your team hands you a resignation letter, it is unfair because it does not give the leader a chance to course correct.  

Another client of mine had a similar situation speaking up regarding their boss’ blind spot.  The boss would think out loud at meetings and share fleeting comments to the team about possibly doing more research.  Some team members would interpret those passing thoughts as requests, and a couple of people would work on the same project and waste time and resources.  Others would view those thoughts as just verballing processing and would not do anything and the boss would wonder why no action was taken.  So, my client shared this observation with their boss, “I noticed this phenomenon happening where your verbal brainstorming is creating confusion and might be wasting time, I’m wondering what if, at the end of a meeting, we share one thing to investigate and one person to do that so there is clarity and no overlap?  How would that work for you, or what would you add to reduce the confusion?”  Before sharing your idea, you can even invite your boss to share possible solutions before you offer yours.  This is a great topic to manage up because you are proposing a process change to improve the business and inviting a co-creating experience.

When NOT to manage up:

1. Personality difference with no business benefit.  If you simply do not like your manager’s style and changing it would make your life easier but have no positive impact on the business or other team members, then it is misusing the spirit of managing up.  For example, if you want your manager to be more optimistic and less realistic because that is your preference, you may be unable to change that.  It is good to ask yourself, how is my request impacting the business other than it’s annoying me?  If their approach is leading to hours wasted, unnecessary confusion, and a lack of direction for you and the team, that’s different.  Tapping into the bigger reason we are here and how we can align to make the business successful is a good guide to managing up.

2. You think you can be leading better.  You may believe you can do the job better than your manager, many of us feel that way from time to time and that can be ok, but when you take action to undermine your boss or try to win or be right at your boss’s expense, that is crossing the line.  To be successful at your job, it is helpful to support your leader publicly and make them look good rather than asserting your will.  And if you believe you can do a better job, great, do your best to get promoted based on the quality of your work and your integrity and when you get that promotion, you will get a chance to lead in the way you want, and your direct reports will follow you based on your style and the benefits that you deliver.

When you can learn the skill of managing up, it will make you a more effective contributor.  The best indicator of managing up is when there is a triple win – you win, your manager/team wins, and the company wins. 

Quote of the day: “Example is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the only thing.” – Albert Schweitzer. 

Q:  When was the last time you had to manage up?  What worked that you would want to repeat?  Comment and share below; we would love to hear from you!

The next blog in this series 2/6 will focus on helpful prework to do to manage up.

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to sharpen their managing up skills, contact me to explore this topic further.

How do you manage up?

What stage is your team in? ( Team Composition Series 3/3)

Teams go through different phases and stages.  Dr. Bruce Tuckman published his 4-stage model in 1965 – Forming, Storming, Norming, and Performing and added a fifth stage, Adjourning in the 1970s. The theory explains the predictable and evolving formative periods most teams experience.  As a leader, your job is to recognize what stage your team is at and think about the right interventions to move them along the team development continuum to reach peak performance and achieve more than they thought possible.  

Let’s jump into Tuckman’s five stages:

Stage 1: Forming.  When a team first assembles, there can be excitement, they may not be sure how things will turn out but some know it can be a great experience.  People spend time getting to know each other and understanding each other’s best attributes.  Respect is granted where you listen to others and share your thoughts, some may offer some goodwill and trust.

There should be a high dependence on the leader for guidance and direction during this phase.  Instead of being reactive to problems that come your way, the leader has the responsibility to be proactive and help their team think about what systems and processes are needed to build a foundation for their best performance.   

Here are some crucial questions the leader should reflect on and be able to answer to some degree before getting input from the team and co-creating the collective culture and structure:

·      What is the team’s purpose?  Why are we here and what are we meant to do? What is the vision that inspires people to jump out of bed every day to partake? What have our stakeholders commissioned us to do? What value are we depositing into the world?

·      What are the team goals, objectives, and KPIs? How can we turn the purpose and vision into a quarterly roadmap?

·      What are everybody’s roles and responsibilities, and how can we best contribute?  How can we share that information so everybody knows other people’s job descriptions and so they know who to turn to for assistance?

·      What are the expectations and agreements that will govern our best work?  What are the ways to weigh in and offer best practices and processes to enhance communication and coordination? How do we want to create psychological safety so we can take risks and reach peak innovation? You can lay out the best way to handle conflict and the process for decision-making get feedback and collectively agree on what would be best for the team.

·      What are the style differences?   How can we improve our understanding of individual preferences, strengths, and weaknesses, and increase our knowledge of working with different types of people?  This one does not need to be fully developed and can unfold as the team moves through the stages.

Stage 2: Storming.  In this phase, team members begin to show their entire colors, and conflict typically arises as there are clashes between work styles, beliefs, values, relationships, and personalities.  Decision-making is more complicated as people become more comfortable challenging each other and the leader.  As team members vie for positions to establish themselves in relation to other team members, they second guess coworkers and wonder, "I thought I trusted you, but now I'm not so sure."  If progress is not being made, they have more questions and concerns, assert their opinions and compete for power and attention.  If the team is too big, subgroups and cliques form, and there may be power struggles and blaming of others.   If not handled well, many teams do not move beyond this stage; they stay underperforming, and it turns out to be a relatively disappointing experience.

Leaders can play an essential role in pushing the team forward.  They can normalize conflict and seek to resolve it productively instead of shying away from it.   For example, when a co-worker says or does something that's not aligned with the team culture, step in and ask them to explain their approach and how it matches with the team’s purpose or culture.  You can revisit the original agreements about having an open and safe forum to exchange and pressure test ideas, even if not in alignment with others. Leaders can then allow team members the space to express different opinions and “clear the air.”  If you do not put ideas on the table, you cannot do anything about them.  They can establish and reinforce processes for effective communication, efficient meetings, solving team issues, and building trust to get teams to see that solving these interpersonal challenges is worth the investment.  Leaders can coach members to take ownership of the success of the team and help them design the changes they want to see. Leaders can ask how each member wants to be a resource for others’ development.  They can reconfirm the vision and get people excited to focus on critical collective goals where the intensity of the emotional and relationship issues is overshadowed by something way more meaningful that will have a substantial impact.

Stage 3: Norming.  When you understand that conflicts can arise and resolve issues amicably, you get rewarded with a genuinely healthy working relationship in the norming stage.  Roles and responsibilities are clear, accepted, and appreciated.  The team builds on processes and understands effective working styles.  Big decisions are made by group consensus or another more effective method agreed upon by the group. More minor decisions may be delegated to individuals or small, self-organizing teams within the larger group as responsibility and ownership are distributed.  There is a rhythm of addressing issues and appreciating differences and strengths as people work toward a common goal.  The impact is that morale and productivity increase, trust builds, commitment and unity strengthen and care for each other, and the work grows.  There is general respect for each other and the leader.  The team may engage in fun social activities and people are generally set up to do the work that everybody agreed upon.

Leaders can create success in this stage by empowering behaviors that allow people to be on the same page, giving and receiving feedback for development, sharing leadership responsibilities, and managing change collaboratively.  At this stage, groupthink can seep in; there could be the temptation that members could feel that they need to get along to go along because there is the fear of going back to the conflict stage when things were not fabulous.  The leader can be on the lookout for this unhelpful development and invoke processes to draw out multiple perspectives and normalize productive disagreement, leverage the strengths of each, take quick action, settle conflicts, and maintain a positive, productive climate.

Stage 4: Performing.  This is an incredible work experience where you are thriving on multiple levels producing excellent results, and having great relationships; it is a 1 + 1 = 3 type of equation; it's an intoxicating feeling.  The team is more strategically aware; knows clearly why it is doing what it is doing.  They have a high degree of autonomy as they go after the shared vision; they tend to overachieve and collaboratively make decisions with the leader.  Even with a high degree of freedom, they know they can depend on each other at any point.  Disagreements are resolved within the team positively, and necessary changes to processes and structures are made by the team regularly to serve the evolving needs best. They are comfortable asking for help and offering it because it is about the team-first approach, and there is a level of safety where people can bring their authentic selves, both their successes and struggles.

A leader can foster this successful stage by allowing even more flexibility in team roles, so people feel like they are being challenged. Leaders can create future leadership opportunities, offer development and support to help people achieve their career aspirations.  Leaders can leverage the learning and spark additional team creativity to attain new heights as they collectively advance. Leaders can also pay attention to momentum building and stalling moments. Daniel Pink also offers some interesting research about midpoints, which is the phenomenon of how teams tend to lose steam mid-project.  With this knowledge, leaders can offer galvanizing interventions to work with this dynamic to keep the momentum unbroken.

Stage 5: Adjourning.  This was added by Tuckman two years after his initial research.  Adjourning is the team’s break-up, hopefully when the task is completed successfully, its purpose fulfilled; everyone can move on to new things, feeling good about what's been achieved and ready to contribute elevated skills to their next body of work.  From an organizational perspective, recognition of and sensitivity to people's vulnerabilities is helpful, particularly if members have been closely bonded and feel a sense of insecurity or threat from this change.

Leaders can mark the occasion and adequately reflect on all the excellent work capturing each person’s contributions and making them feel proud for being a part of a memorable experience.  They can create hope for the future that they have skills and abilities and effective work practices that they can transfer to their next project.

 As a leader joining a new team, it is useful to find out what stage your team is in because if you enter their high-performing stage and treat them like they are in the forming or storming stage, they will be unhappy. It’s helpful to begin with a lot of listening and observation so you can spot where they are.  You can ask questions such as - what’s happening on the team, where is everybody, what are the best aspects of this team that you want to leverage going forward, what tweaks would you like to make, if any, to do even better work, how can I be most helpful to advance the team?  Instead of thinking you have the right diagnosis, they can tell you what they want without knowing the details and history.  Once having a deeper understanding, you can co-create the work together so all parties have a stake.

These five stages can progress and regress depending on team makeup, leadership, and client work changes.  When that happens, it is helpful to revisit the forming stage, even briefly, so you can put together a clear roadmap that will add eventual speed to the process. Knowing where your team is and how to support them will allow them to do their best work.

Quotes of the day:  Coming together is a beginning, staying together is progress, and working together is a success." – Henry Ford

Q: What stage is your team in?  As a leader, how would you like to support your team?  As a team member, how would you like to contribute? Comment and share with us; we would love to hear!

 As a Leadership and Team Coach, I partner with leaders and teams to cultivate a flourishing team culture, contact me to learn more.

Bruce Tuckman’s Team Model

What’s The Best Way To Address Accountability? (Accountability Series 3/3)

Having an accountability conversation to let somebody know where they stand is essential for an excellent culture.  It should not just happen in one conversation where all your stored information comes out at once, but it should be communicated through multiple interactions. And, as the recipient, while it may not feel good at the time, it is a gift to have that valuable information to know exactly where your performance stands.

Here are some steps to consider when thinking about an accountability conversation:

1. Check in with yourself.  When a work issue is causing you stress, a typical first instinct is to point outward and blame others.  But if you want to have a productive conversation with someone who appears not to get it, first consider if you may be contributing to the problem (even unintentionally).  Instead of asking, “Why aren’t they doing your part,” you can ask a series of questions to look internally first, such as “Is there anything I can do differently to help? Have I been clear about my expectations?  Have I asked what I can do to help?  Have I taken time to brainstorm and review processes?  Have I built an accountability plan with them?”  Self-awareness is a leadership superpower and reflecting on this may help you recognize any unhelpful patterns. 

2. Use the Accountability Dial.  Author Jonathan Raymond offers the accountability dial as a helpful framework to keep others accountable.  There are five steps: mention, invitation, conversation, boundary, and limit.

A. Mention. A brief comment or piece of feedback that you noticed that you want to check in and get more information.  It can be something that might be counterproductive.  For example, “I noticed that the proposal that went out today had aspects that were a little unclear.  If I was the customer, I think they would have had a hard time figuring out what we meant based on our previous meeting.”  The mention can also be empowering – I loved how you kept that meeting on track; I know how distracting it was to keep pace with the conversation going on in the chatbox or off to the side.  It is best to mention right after the event and not wait for the quarterly or yearly meeting.  The mention is about offering a piece of data you notice that is either helpful or hurtful to the person to have timely feedback so they know what to do more of or what to do less of. 

B. Invitation.  This is about asking the person to connect a few mentions and get their take to put things into context and learn about that fuller picture.  Three different isolated mentions on the same topic can help them see a pattern.  For example, if your team member is constantly missing deadlines, you could begin by saying, “I’ve noticed that you seem to need a little more time to get the work done lately (or insert another behavior).   What’s the pattern here?”  They may not have been aware that they have been late in different aspects of the project; let them make that connection and give any additional context that can get at the root challenge.  To test to see if there is alignment on expectations, you can have them provide a self-assessment of what quality of work would look like and what standards would need to be met.

C. Conversation.  It is a one-on-one discussion to learn even more about what’s going on.  You brought information to their attention in your mentions, and in the invitation, you welcomed them to think about their behavior in the big picture.  The goal of a conversation is to listen, remain genuinely open to their take on things, and restore the work instead of casting blame.  It helps to assume positive intent and come from a place of curiosity and support and not a mindset of hostility where there are unhelpful and untrue assumptions being tossed around.  You can start with any of the following:

· The expectation was X and Y was delivered, what is behind this misalignment?  

·  There is a conclusion I have drawn based on your behavior, but I know I only have a snapshot and that there is crucial information I may be missing, so would love to learn more from you.

· Your performance fell short of the goals we set together. I would love to know the barriers that got in the way and what we can do differently going forward.

· Help me understand the disconnect of where we set the goals and where we fell short so we can do things better next time.

You may discover that they are not “lazy,” “incapable,” or “unreliable,” but rather, that they are unclear on organizational goals, and therefore, are not properly prioritizing projects.  You may discover that they need more feedback to do their best or that other obstacles hold them back.  In Crucial Accountability, Kerry Patterson et al note that 70% of project managers admitted that they would be late because deadlines were initially unrealistic.  While none of these factors entirely excuse a broken commitment, lack of initiative, or follow-through, acknowledging what they have said, understanding the underlying issues, and noting where they are coming from can give you a clear idea about how to move forward, even if it means you disagree.  This is an excellent opportunity for you to be supportive and offer positive reinforcement.

If you do not learn anything valuable and they are just slacking for some reason, you need to deliver the truth.  Talk about how their behavior is impacting the company.  You may say, “I know you do not intend to take the team sideways, but when you do not return emails on time that have action items in them, it makes life harder for the rest of the team and more difficult for the customers and stakeholders.” Pointing out their specific behavior always works best when you have built trust and demonstrated that you care.  Maybe they did not have any idea of their impact or did not think it was a big deal, but now understand, and do not want to be the person everybody chases, so they are ready to make some adjustments.  You can also use the contrasting approach, which shares what you are not intending before the feedback.  For example, “I’m not saying it was wrong for you to disagree with me in the meeting, we need to hear everyone’s view to make the best choice, but I think the team listened to your tone as attacking, and it would be better to address your concerns with me privately or in the meeting with a curious and positive manner, how do you see it?”

It’s essential to leave the conversation where you both understand what the underlying issue is, how to address it, what success looks like, what needs to be done, by who, and by which date to achieve it.  Having that type of clarity and mutual agreement on how to move forward can be a game-changer.  You can also have them suggest that they are planning to make changes and even ask them if they are open to trying some new strategies.  You can reassure them that you want them to be set up for success and get one last confirmation – “does this all seem doable given other things on your plate?”

D. The Boundary.  If the conversation and feedback did not change their behavior, you need to have another conversation, and talk about the boundary or the limit.  The boundary is the idea that even though they have been working on something and made some change, it is not enough or not to the desired standard.  I know this can be uncomfortable, but you are providing feedback in the spirit of helping them grow.  Not addressing the behavior would send a message that you approve of their behavior which can continue to harm the team.  The outcome could be that you monitor a specific behavior change you want them to show in a reasonable time frame.   

E. The limit.  A clear consequence and the last step before the person is dismissed. In the conversation, you tell the person you have tried everything you could – coaching, mentoring, feedback, and other supports.  Where we go from here is on them.  They can take the weekend and tell you if they want to stay and present their plan of what they are prepared to do that has not been tried or if they want to go because it is not the right fit for them now and they want to move on.  Two things can likely happen – they can reflect or talk to others to have that wake-up call to realize they can be better and move into another gear and come back and show this newfound initiative, or they will select out.  When you have determined that the person cannot meet the expectations, don’t delay, let them find another place where they can thrive.  As a leader, it is not about keeping everybody happy, it is about keeping the organization humming along where people can achieve their best, and a crucial part of that is emphasizing accountability and maintaining standards of excellence; that’s part of what keeps morale high. 

Raymond stresses that the Dial is not a linear process – it can be turned up and down depending on the situation.  For serious issues, you may jump immediately to the conversation or even the limit.

You can also use a more simplified 3-step framework for accountability which would be to communicate the expectations and observations, follow-up to make sure the expectations are communicated right and are being met, and make the consequences clear. The consequence can be positive or negative, if they are exceeding an expectation, they could get certain recognitions. A common pitfall is that most managers do not do step 1 or 2 well but then go heavy on the consequential in an annual review because they have 6-12 months of stored feedback.

When one team member’s behavior and work performance negatively impacts another, you need to hold the person accountable.  An excellent tool to use is the Accountability Dial, which starts with mentioning the behavior, inviting them to see patterns, having a conversation to learn more, showing the boundary, and utilizing the limit.  Keeping people accountable is the kind thing to do because not addressing their unacceptable behavior would be perpetuating the cycle of failure and wreak havoc on all those involved. 

Q: How do you initiate your accountability conversation for maximum results?  Comment and share below; we would love to hear from you!

Quote of the day: "When we fail to set boundaries and hold people accountable, we feel used and mistreated. This is why we sometimes attack who they are, which is far more hurtful than addressing a behavior or a choice." ― Brené Brown

"When it comes to privacy and accountability, people always demand the former for themselves and the latter for everyone else." David Brin, Author 

As a Leadership and Executive Coach, I partner with others to help with all kinds of accountability, contact me to learn more.

The best cultures embrace accountability conversations

What’s Your Accountability System? (Accountability Series 2/3)

Now that we talked about the importance of accountability and why it is not happening, let’s jump into creating a process that fosters excellent accountability.

When leaders can put some of these structures in place, they can nurture an accountable culture.  Here are some steps to consider:

1. Clear Expectations.  The first step is to have a meeting to be crystal clear about your expectations — the desired results you’re seeking, the capabilities needed for the job, how you’ll measure success, and what standard you seek.  It does not all have to come from you. The more skilled your people are, the more ideas and strategies they can contribute.  They should have the autonomy to determine the HOW in achieving their objectives. When you have a genuine two-way conversation about ways to contribute and tactics that they are considering, you will create the necessary buy-in and build confidence in tackling the project.   Before the meeting’s end, you can learn if you are on the same page by asking the other person to summarize the critical pieces - results, capabilities to be successful, metrics, and approaches to reinforce that alignment.

A. Clear outcomes.  What are the outcomes to be produced?  While the employee has the autonomy to figure out how they will achieve results, it is vital to specify a general destination and set the standard of excellence so they have the example.  If I tell you to put together a presentation and do not explain some requirements such as length of time and critical aspects, your understanding of a presentation can be vastly different from the other mine. Let’s talk about the parameters to mitigate any confusion.

B. Clear capability.  Be sure that the person you are holding accountable has the skills and resources they will need otherwise they might be set up for failure.   You can ask yourself, what do they need to meet the expectations?  If the person does not have what’s necessary, can they acquire what’s missing?  If so, what’s the plan?  If not, how can they delegate parts of the work?

Here are some helpful questions to ask to create active effort (certainty on how to move forward) rather than anxious effort (uncertainty which morphs into procrastination).

·       What do you see yourself needing to do to be able to achieve the result?

·       What could get in the way?  Excuses can be helpful signs; once surfaced, they can now be included in the roadmap.  You can offer a follow-up – “Given what's in the way, what’s possible or what else can be done?”

·       Where are the first 1-3 places to begin?

C. Clear measurement.  During the expectation conversation, you should agree on weekly (or whatever cadence works best) milestones with clear, measurable, objective targets.  If any of these targets slip, jump on it immediately, brainstorm a solution, identify a fix, redesign the timeline, or respond in other productive ways that get the person back on track.  Nothing frustrates leaders more than being surprised by failure to meet expectations in the 11th hour.  Sometimes this failure is due to premature optimism on both sides, or the direct report is reluctant to ask for help. Either way, it can be avoided or mitigated with clear and transparent communication.

2. Clear feedback.  In one of your first feedback meetings, you can ask them how they like to receive feedback and consider their preferences.  Honest, open, ongoing feedback is critical to their development, and just because you have said something once, does not mean you are done; good feedback should be continuous and reinforced.   People should know where they stand.  You can ask yourself, is the person delivering on their commitments?  Are they working well with other stakeholders?  If they need to increase their capability, are they on track? When you have clear expectations, capabilities, and measurements, your input will most likely be fact-based and easier to deliver. The feedback can also go both ways — is there something you can be doing to be more helpful?  

Co-Founder of Pixar Ed Catmull said feedback should always leave an employee inspired.  Ask questions that start with what or how, such as:

·      What will you have to do to have this done on time (rather than, do you expect to have this done on time)?

·      What ideas do you have (rather than do you have any ideas)?  

·      What do you want to do next regarding your objective? 

·      When this happens, what do you want to happen next?

·      How will you keep yourself and the project accountable for what you want?

·      How will we accomplish X by this date with only Z resources available to us? (instead of jumping in and helping, let them take a first crack at solving the problem).

·      I need your help, when you miss meetings frequently [insert behavior], I feel/think/wonder that you are not committed to the position.  Could I have some clarity on this?  What would it take for you to be at the meetings?  In the future, I expect you to be at the meetings because your input is essential.  What do you see getting in the way of this expectation? What’s needed to meet it?

Undergirding all these questions is genuine care, trust, and support. You should let the person know that feedback is about providing supportive accountability, not in remediating problematic behaviors or surveillance.  It is meant to accelerate their behavior through continued conversations so they can do hard work, think, learn, grow, and contribute.  When employees believe their bosses are interested in their success, they feel less guarded and less inclined to hide their underperformance.  If you have not built that trust or if the feedback is not sincere, it will not work. When the trust is there, people will be open to sharing failures that can be addressed at the moment because they are learning opportunities and not mistakes to be covered up.  When people feel criticized or attack or when there is fear, they will shut down and it will be a culture of psychological danger.

When the job is done, you can ask them to walk you through how they did their work to engender pride.  You can learn about the parts they struggled with and the parts in which they were incredibly satisfied.  Other good questions to ask:

·       What did you learn? 

·       What are you most proud of?  

·       What aspect do you want to carry forward to your next project?

3. Clear consequences.  How would they like to be held accountable so you can cater to their style within limits?  This is important because you can use the same approach with different people, and one person could be embarrassed while the other empowered.  When you know your people’s preferences, you can better support them.

4. Model accountability by going first.  A great way to create a culture of accountability and enhance psychological safety is to share that accountability travels both ways.  While you will hold your direct report accountable for their work, you expect that they will hold you to it as well.  If we want to be the best we can be, we have to have high standards and when they are not reached, we want to address them, so we know what to do better and differently next time.  You can share the standards you have for yourself and when they notice you have not met them, your expectation is that they are going to tell you where you have fallen short so you can learn and grow together.  It is not about criticizing in public, but constructively addressing the issue in private.  When the leader goes first it emphasizes the importance of promoting a culture of ownership. 

5.  Address challenges that could surface at the beginning.  You can share that when a promise of delivery is made, there is an expectation that it will be done.  If something comes up that compromises the timeline, it is essential to bring it up.  I’d rather know about a situation days or weeks before the big meeting so there is enough time to come up with creative solutions or workarounds or bring in support than to learn 5 minutes before the meeting with no opportunity to remedy the situation.   The damage to the relationship is most severe when people wait too long to bring up an issue because they do not want to disappoint the person or they have a hard time with tough conversations. Delays do happen, Author Kim Scott shared that when writing her book Radical Candor, she thought it would take 3 months, but it ended up taking 4 years but she was able to keep the trust in line because she was always upfront about shifting timelines.

If you are reasonably sure that you were clear with expectations and did what was necessary to support their performance, and they still have not proven to be accountable, in that case, they may not be a good fit for the role and could lead to a change (in position, teams, or in the company) that would create more of a win-win.

Setting up a process of accountability, including clear expectations, feedback, and consequences can empower others to take responsibility.

Q: What is your system for holding others accountable?  Comment and share below; we would love to hear from you!

Quotes of the day: "Leaders inspire accountability through their ability to accept responsibility before they place blame." ― Courtney Lynch

"Responsibility equals accountability equals ownership.  And a sense of ownership is the most powerful weapon a team or organization can have." -Pat Summitt

[The next blog in this series 3/3 will focus on having an effective accountability conversation]

As a Leadership and Executive Coach, I partner with others to help with all kinds of accountability, contact me to learn more.

It all begins with clear expectations

How does your company prevent difficult workers from getting hired? (Workplace Conflict Series 3/3)

How you treat people matters more than anything.  Companies should create a culture of respect, and every leader should have an obligation to uphold a no-jerk environment because it allows for great work to be done and it is simply the right thing to do.

The impact of a toxic worker is quite significant.  Experts say, when a team member procrastinates or displays a bad attitude, there is a real risk of social contagion, which drives down the morale and productivity of those around them. Susan Davis, author of Emotional Agility contends, “we all pick up on settle cues from others, and that affects our behavior and actions.” This behavior can lead to poor team efficiency, lower levels of commitment, and less of a focus on the shared goals.  Furthermore, ignoring the issue makes the problem more acute.  According to Allan Cohen, Babson Professor of Global Leadership, when people do not carry their weight, frustration grows because others need to do more.

Knowing this negative impact, here are some things a company can do to protect the culture from toxic workers:

1. Screen them out in the hiring process.  If you determine that somebody could exhibit toxic behavior, perhaps they care only about individual results at the expense of others, do not hire them, no matter how capable and brilliant they may be.  Professor of Management Science at Stanford University Bob Sutton said that toxic people make us less productive.  Maybe you cannot be certain if somebody has a lot of jerk behaviors during the interview, but you can do everything you can to find out more in the hiring process.  Luis Von Ahn, CEO and Cofounder of Duolingo offers this advice.  When you contact their reference, you can ask, “Did he/she work well with others?”  You are looking for a more definitive and enthusiastic response like “absolutely” over a more wishy-washy one – “yeah, for most people.”  Maybe you detect the reference is being coy, you can frame your questions to elicit specific choices.  For example, “what’s more likely - that this person will be a total pushover or a little manipulative?”  “Work more by themselves or inclined to work with others?”  Listen closely to these responses because they can contain the exact answers you are seeking. 

2. Align stated company values with practiced behaviors. If you ask a set of random employees, who are the superstars in the organization and you find out that they are the top producers who also happen to be toxic at times, it seems as if the company is rewarding bad behavior.  So how can you practice what you preach? If you care about teamwork, how are you building that in your incentive and promotion strategy to reward that kind of behavior?  For example, the stated values of Enron in the 90s were communication, respect, integrity, and excellence. They claimed they valued good behavior, but they actually rewarded ruthlessness and selfishness. When you incentivize individual achievement rather than promoting people based on how they elevate others, it contributes to a toxic culture. How about a mixed approach? Part of their compensation can be directly related to how much they have helped others, exhibited through observation and peer feedback, and part can be from their individual contributions.

3. Make the offenders aware of how they are treating people. You can offer “360 reviews” where leaders can receive valuable data from their peers, subordinates, direct reports, and others.  Sometimes it is just that awareness that their behavior is problematic which can be enough to course correct. When Cindy Hess, Partner at a law firm learned of some selfish behaviors she had which were revealed through reviews, she was stunned and took steps to make adjustments. Companies can offer management training programs to help build the cadre of soft skills that help leaders invest in others.  

Another way to raise awareness is for companies to provide a free-market approach where their subordinates have some say in choosing their boss or team lead. At Fenwick and West, Partners choose their associates to service their clients but Associates have every right to say no if they feel it is not a right fit.  They obviously prefer to pick Partners who they enjoy working with, who they can learn from, and who will take an interest in their development and career trajectory.  If none of the Associates are picking you, that exposes a hard truth.  Similarly, if there is a mentorship program and mentees get to pick who they want to work with based on reputation, and again you keep getting passed up, this needs to be explored and addressed.  To make sure leaders know how they are being viewed, the company does anonymous upward reviews were Junior Associates rate Senior Partners.  According to Glassdoor, Fenwick and West is one of the top Silicon Valley law firms to work for in terms of cultural excellence. 

4. Have a Zero Tolerance Policy. You cannot allow demeaning or disrespectful behavior from anybody, including upper management.  When companies act swiftly, it sends a message that this conduct will not be tolerated and employees will be protected.  This does not mean that there will be no hard conversations or people will not get upset from time to time, but that there will be consequences for repeated poor behavior.  If somebody is getting frequent complaints and they refuse to acknowledge the problem or change their behavior, they should be let go.  Studies show the presence of one person exhibiting toxic behavior can bring down a whole team, that it is better to have a hole in the team than to have an additional person that is not helpful. Studies also show that it is actually much more profitable to replace a worker displaying poor behavior with an average performer, as opposed to upgrading an average performer to star status, it is because the one who is showing negativity has a much more damaging impact.

There is no such thing as a perfect culture, but companies can do their best to create an environment that values support, respect, and positive interactions.  We spend so much of our time at work that it is only right to expect that we are treated with dignity so we can give our best performance.

Quote of the day: “I am thankful to all those difficult people in my life, they have shown me exactly who I do not want to be!” – Unknown

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to have difficult conversations, contact me to explore this topic further.

Q: How does your company protect you from toxic workers and maintain an amazing culture?  Comment and share below, we would love to hear from you!

Getting rid of a toxic culture begins with removing a toxic person

How Do You Deal With A Difficult Boss? (Workplace Conflict Series 2/3)

Steve Jobs has had a complicated legacy.  While few would doubt his visionary abilities, many would call into question his leadership style and weak interpersonal skills.  He has been described as deceitful and cruel, even by his friends.  It is known that he cheated his co-founder out of a big bonus and lied about it. While Walter Isaacson was conducting research when writing the biography of Jobs, Apple Engineer Johnny Ives told Isaacson that when Jobs got frustrated, his way to achieve catharsis was to hurt someone.  According to Ives, Jobs felt he had the liberty and license to do it.

Like Jobs, there are hundreds of other leaders who treat their employees poorly.  Research shows that leaders who demean their workers have rationalized their aggression because, at times, they can get short-term results so they feel vindicated in their unsavory behavior to achieve their goals. This problem is compounded when the long-term damage they are causing to others is invisible to them.  Bad bosses may also see the situation in black and white terms, thinking – “I have to use this behavior or I will not get these outcomes.” But there is a big difference between being demanding (having high expectations for others) and demeaning (devaluing other people, even treating them disrespectfully and making them feel worthless).  This tradeoff does not need to exist because it is possible to show respect and set a high bar.  Kim Scott’s Radical Candor uses this exact leadership approach – caring for somebody personally and challenging them professionally.

The impact of toxic bosses can be quite detrimental.  Here are some company consequences: 

1. Negatively affects performance and reduces worker productivity. The presence of a bad boss can cause team members to make mistakes and doubt themselves. In one experiment with a medical team in Israel, a doctor berated his team and said he was not impressed with their medical care and that they would not last in the department for more than a week.  In the ensuing days, the percentage of an accurate diagnosis by the team went down by 20% and the procedures they did were 15% less effective.  When we work with somebody who has abused us mentally, our cognitive abilities decline.  Essentially, working with an angry boss makes us dumber.  In another experiment, students were instructed to walk into a testing room, but instead accidentally walked into the professor’s office.  Immediately, the professor berated the students and said, “Are you not smart enough to see the do-not-disturb sign?” They then took a math test and solved a quarter fewer anagrams correctly compared to the students who were not just lambasted.

2. Less likely to help others.  In that same experiment, people who were just scolded by the professor opted not to help others when they had the opportunity to do so.  In another experiment, as students were leaving the school building after enduring some harsh words, they saw a few classmates drop a bunch of books and choose to keep walking instead of helping to pick them up.  The best teams are collaborative ones so if people are holding back with their assistance, teams cannot reach peak performance.

3. Creates silence and shutdown.  Toxic bosses create an environment where people stay quiet because they want to avoid rocking the boat.  They are trying to stay under the radar because they do not want to be a target for any abuse. This significantly hurts teams and organizations because there is no feeling of psychological safety for people to contribute their ideas, especially when half-formed. Having that environment where you can comfortably share and be supported is a necessary component to reach collective intelligence and do great work.

Responses to Avoid

When you are feeling abused and wanting immediate reconciliation, it can be tempting to opt for less helpful responses that may feel good in the short-term but carry severe negative long-term consequences.  Here are some to avoid: 

1. Do nothing and endure. This decision can eat you up inside and cause resentment.  The discontent cannot only manifest at the workplace but also at home and create an unhappy disposition with the people you care for the most.  When we continuously repress our feelings, it comes out in other ways, often when we least expect it or cannot afford for it to leak out.

2. Fight back at the moment.  It is not the best idea if you have not collected your thoughts, yet choose to unleash them spontaneously for the sake of justice.  After all, you believe that this person simply cannot go around rebuking people the way they do, and you are going to be the person to change their behavior.  The problem with this savior mentality is that it is immediately going to put the person on the defensive and they have been playing the angry-and-public-ridicule game for much longer than you have so picking a fight on their turf may be gratifying at the moment, but most likely does not lead to a productive resolution.

Responses to Consider

Here are some helpful steps you can take to confront your boss thoughtfully and productively so you can decide your next move:

1. Focus on personal impact.  See if you can find a respectful way of letting them know the impact they are having on you.  People sometimes do not see how upsetting, demeaning, and unprofessional their actions are to you, your team, or the organization.   Other people's intentions only exist in their hearts and minds so we cannot assume that we know them. We feel hurt so we think that they intended to hurt us, but when we can disentangle intent from impact and apply curiosity, we can get more information on how best to respond and understand why this is occurring.  The best-case scenario is that they understand just how much you have been affected and take steps to change their behavior.

2. Change teams. If you believe in your company’s purpose and vision but are having a hard time with the manager, see if you can change teams so you are no longer reporting to your boss. If enough people are requesting a transfer, it will become obvious where the source of the problem exists.

3. Change jobs.  If you conclude that the other person had intentions to hurt you or does not plan on changing, and this is typical of what goes on in different parts of the organization, you may want to consider leaving your job.  What is all this heartache and pain costing you?  Find that leader in a people-first company who will not only treat you with dignity but will inspire you and bring out your very best.

The big question that people always ask about Steve Jobs is - did he have to be so mean?  Walter Isaacson would argue that he succeeded in spite of his cruelty, not because of it. The kindness routes are always the better paths to travel down because you will get better results and create stronger relationships along the way.

Quote of the day:  “Having a bad boss isn't your fault. Staying with one is.” -Nora Denzel 

Q: How have you handled a difficult boss? Comment and share with us, we would love to hear your opinions.

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to have courageous conversations, contact me to explore this topic further.

[The next blog in this series 3/3 will focus on what organizations can do to prevent difficult people from tanking the culture]

How do you handle a difficult boss?

Have you mastered the art of working with a difficult Teammate? (Workplace Conflict Series 1/3)

There is always that one person you work with whose job is to make everybody’s life just a little more difficult.  They show nuanced passive-aggressiveness by hinting at what they dislike instead of having clear communication, they take credit for wins they have not contributed to, they dole out blame unfairly, they provide misleading or incomplete information to make your work more cumbersome than it has to be.  They can also display their difficulty in more obvious ways – raising their voices, ridiculing, complaining, and showing an overall foul attitude.  This person may behave this way either because they are unaware of their actions or because they know exactly what they are doing and simply do not care or cannot control it.  Do you know who I am talking about? 

If you find yourself working with somebody who is making your job more stressful and you do not have the power to separate from that person, there are still actions you can take to ameliorate the situation.

It all begins with a clear conversation to increase understanding.  Here are helpful tips when approaching your discussion:

1. Assume you do not know instead of jumping to conclusions.  Management Professor at Babson College Allan Cohen says that it is human nature to make assumptions about other people’s motives, even when we lack real evidence.  It is how our brains work, but this shortcut does not always lead to the right conclusions. Instead of assuming that somebody is trying to make your life more arduous, you can ask: “I don’t know what is going on, but whatever it is, would you like to figure it out together?” “I noticed when I share my opinion, you talk over me, and I’m unable to finish my thoughts, I’d love to learn more about that behavior and how we can work together more effectively.”  When you are curious and sincere, you can uncover information for the best resolution.

2. Give the other person the benefit of the doubt.  It is usually true that each person will think the other is being a jerk and that they are trying to hurt, embarrass, or upset one another. But what if this was not true?  In that case, it is best to apply curiosity and turn the discussion into a learning conversation so you can get to the root of the behavior.  When you assume the best intentions, you are more likely to approach the situation with an open mind and be receptive to the information for real change to occur. There is something important about entering a conversation and putting aside your frustrations and emotions at the moment to think about how you can serve the other person while also handling yourself well.

3. Understand the person’s motives. Asking empowering questions can help you understand your teammates’ motives so you know how to work best with them.  Questions such as, what else is going on for you right now or what is motivating you, can be illuminating.  When you inquire about their interests, motivations, and priorities, you get a better sense of their perspective and can learn about what causes their behavior and how you can work with their style and intentions.

4. Label the person’s behavior.  Neil Rackman, President of Huthwaite Inc. examined the difference between an expert and an average negotiator and found that experts are more likely to label other people’s behavior and confirm their understanding.  If somebody starts yelling during the conversation, you can take a step back and call out their behavior. “It seems like yelling is one of your favorite motivational strategies.  Do you think that is going to be effective here?”  This approach puts them in a logical frame of mind so they can recognize the behavior and adjust.  You can also take a break by saying, “It seems like we may need a minute (in a calm, monotone voice), I’m going to get a cup of coffee, would you like one?” Taking those few minutes will allow each of you to regroup and reenter the conversation in a more productive way.

5. Adjust your expectations.  It can be helpful to know that sometimes people are not going to behave well either because they are having a bad day or maybe they have never been given the tools to learn how to handle themselves well in a professional context or as human begins in general.  For whatever reason people do not show up as their best selves or maybe their best is not good enough, it is helpful to adjust your expectations.  You cannot assume that somebody has the same experience, tools, training to handle situations well or in the way that you would. 

6. Provide choice.  If you find yourself in a tough conflict, you can offer a choice by saying the following, “We arrived at this moment because we may have had different expectations, and now that we have run into the issue, here are some options I can think of to resolve the dilemma, which one do you think is best?”  When you present them with a series of options that you are comfortable with, you give them some control over the process and it makes a difference because people love choices. 

The key to dealing with conflict on the team is to retrace the steps to see how you got here, see each other’s perspective, build understanding, and move forward together on a more productive note.  When you are curious and approach people positively, you may be pleasantly surprised.

Quote of the day: “Show respect even to people that don’t deserve it; not as a reflection of their character, but as a reflection of yours.” – Author Dave Willis

Q: How have you handled a tough teammate?  What’s your favorite strategy for achieving peace with them? Comment and share below; we would love to hear from you!

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with people to have difficult conversations, contact me to explore this topic further.

[The next blog in this series 2/3 will focus on dealing with a difficult boss]

How do you handle a difficult teammate?

Top 6 Ways to Brainstorm (Brainstorming 2/2)

In the last article, I wrote about how adding guidelines can improve the process of brainstorming, however, there are many different types of brainstorming. Let’s explore six popular ways to spark creativity on your team.

1. Brain Writing. Start by giving people time to think and work alone by writing down all of their ideas.  Then come together as a group and each person shares one idea at a time. When you separate the individual idea generation stage from the group discussion phrase, it allows for many more initial possibilities. You can then narrow down your selections by detecting the overlapping themes and building on these smaller and more concentrated concepts in greater detail.

2. 6-3-5 method. In this approach developed by Bernd Rohrbach in the 60s, six people sit around a table and pass their three ideas to the person on the right who builds on them.  This passing is done five times (or more) until everybody has had time to add to each idea.  They then get together and evaluate and search for commonalities.  This method is successful because it slows down the creative process since it gives everybody in the room adequate time to generate and strengthen before moving on to the evaluation phase.  It also prevents those who want to rush into solution mode because they are uncomfortable with uncertainty.

3. Round Robin Brainstorming. After each person has prepared something to share, the facilitator will go around the table requesting one idea from each person.  The job of the facilitator is to ensure an orderly process so everybody has a chance to talk and nobody evaluates the ideas until all have the opportunity to share.  This approach can be useful when team members have a tendency to stay quiet.  It also provides additional control for those who want to start analyzing the first few ideas before seeing the whole menu presented, they will have to wait until everybody has offered something.

4. Nominal Group Technique. Is a structured method for group brainstorming that can illicit creative answers to specific problems. Team members begin by writing down their ideas, then selecting which ones they feel are best. Once they are ready, everyone presents their favorite idea persuasively and then discussed and evaluated thoroughly. The group can take a simple vote for the ideas that they want to prioritize to further develop.

5. Sentence Stems. These include a series of prompts to get the discussion started.  For example, “we can cut our costs 10% by…?”  “We can become #1 in our space by…?”  Researchers at Google, Facebook, and IDEO have come up with a powerful three-word sentence starter – “How Might We…?” Each word is deliberately chosen, the HOW encourages detailed description, the MIGHT allows for freedom and creativity and the WE invites anybody to participate.  According to Duane Bray, the Head of Talent at IDEO, “How Might We” questions are so effective because they “allow clients to mentally reset and reframe a problem as an opportunity.”

6. Sketch Storming. This is the combination of drawing and writing to visually present your ideas.   Some concepts can be too abstract and difficult to describe in words so using diagrams and drawings can be helpful.  The depictions may even illicit multiple interpretations and fun, creative offshoots.

Whichever method you choose, the key is creating an environment of psychological safety so people can be encouraged to take risks in their thinking and silliness. You can choose to start with a fun warmup game.  Management Professor Leigh Thompson conducted a study on this subject and found that groups who shared funny or embarrassing stories about themselves came up with 26% more ideas and were 15% more creative than the groups who did not.

The best creative groups are not just the sum of their parts, but the totality of their experiences. When you can effectively implement methods that elicit people’s best, ideas blossom. 

Quote of the Day: “Creativity requires the courage to let go of certainty” -Erich Fromm

Q: What’s your favorite brainstorming technique? Comment and share below, we would be overjoyed to hear from you!

As a Leadership Development & Executive Coach, I work with teams to facilitate processes for brainstorming & creativity. Contact me to learn more.

Which brainstorming methods yield the greatest results?

Teams Who Break Bread Together, Bond (Team Series 8/10)

How often does your team eat together?  This simple yet powerful act can have a myriad of positive benefits.  

Research by Professor Kevin Kniffin of Cornell University found how extraordinary meaningful eating together can be.  One study looked at firefighters who engaged in Commensality – preparing and eating food together – and it showed that those who ate together did their jobs better.  In some cases, there is a lot of cooperative behavior that underline meal practice - collecting money, planning, talking, cleaning, and eating - all enhance group performance on the job.  In fact, cooperative behavior was twice as high for those who ate together versus those who did not.  Even those who did not contribute money for the meals still went in on the experience as they brought their food to eat with the others.  Eating together is essential for making the team more effective because it makes a group feel like a kind of family and creates bonds beyond the job. 

You can see this also happening in the sports arena.  Spurs legendary basketball Coach Gregg Popovich, who has the most wins in NBA history, knows all about building a strong team culture.  The Spurs eat together as often as they play basketball with a high number of team, group, and coach dinners.  As a food connoisseur, Popovich plans the restaurants and meals carefully, and at the end of the season, each player gets a leather-bound book containing the menus and wine labels from every dinner.  It’s a bonding experience that each player remembers long after the event.  

Companies would do well investing in how employees eat at work.  Google offers free high quality abundantly varied meals, which increases the odds that teammates will eat with each other and build further connections. While it is unrealistic to think that every company can provide meals, some simple things can be done to encourage your team or organizational members to break bread together more frequently.

Here are some practices you can use to encourage more team mingling:

1. Lunch roulette.  This is a great way to foster in-company networking.  It is currently being employed at Boehringer Ingelheim.  It works in four simple steps.  Participants select a date when they are free for lunch and choose one of the company cafeterias in which to travel.  They then click a “Match Me” button, and a lunch date and calendar reminder are emailed to their mailboxes.  After that, all they need to do is show up with an open mind and a willingness to connect.  Within seven weeks of the program, more than 350 people were matched, including a more unusual pairing of the CEO with a young member of one of the brand marketing teams.  It is a practical way of creating links where none had existed and exposing colleagues to different ideas and perspectives. Unexpected pairings and conversations for creative collaborations are always a welcomed surprise. And if you do not prefer to use an app to do these matchings, you can make the sign-ups electronically available as a google doc where people can add their names. If you are unable to meet in person, you can arrange a zoom lunch and create connections even while physically distanced.

2. Lunch and learn.  Similar to lunch roulette, but combines a more formal learning and socializing approach. You write down three things you would be interested in sharing and three things you would like to learn.  Partners are made based on mutual interest.  It is a great informal way of building cross-functional engagement and connecting with people who work in different departments that you do not get that much personal time to interact. This helps to create greater bonds and connect with people outside your immediate team.  Other than one-on-ones, you can also choose to have a small group gathering to amplify the learning experience.

When you dedicate time to get to know others and eat food together, you are creating special moments.  You may find yourself talking about meaningful personal topics that keep you connected to others in unbreakable ways. Additionally, that positive energy transfers into the work world as there is a significant correlation between eating together and positive performance.

Quote of the day: “First we eat, then we do everything else.” -Writer M.F.K Fisher

Q: What food practices do you have to spend better quality time with others? Comment and share with us, we would love to hear from you!

*The next blog in this team series 9/10 will explore the importance of rituals for teams.

As a Leadership Development & Team Coach, I offer teambuilding seminars & coaching Contact me to learn more.

The power of community through meal sharing

Collective Intelligence is the Goal (Team Series 7/10)

Your team is filled with highly talented individuals, yet you are not getting desired results.  How do you get your all-stars to contribute to something larger than themselves to produce excellence?

In 2008, a group of psychologists from Carnegie Mellon and MIT wondered what made teams consistently better?  The answer – harnessing the power of collective intelligence or the coming together of people to share their knowledge and insights.  Michael Silverman, MD of Silverman Research, defines collective intelligence as “something that emerges from a group that is distinct from the smarts of any single member.” 

They concluded that two factors go into fostering collective intelligence.

1. Have equal distribution of conversation.  When you have all people speak for roughly the same amount of time during a meeting, you have the presence of what researchers call “equality in distribution of conversational turn-taking.”  Whether people are speaking a little bit on each of the meeting tasks or more on one or two of them, as long as the balance sheet shows roughly the same amount of air time, collective intelligence can be reached.  Anita Woolley, the study’s lead author offered, “As long as everyone got a chance to talk, the team did well.  If only one person or a small group spoke all the time, the collective intelligence declined.”

Executive Producer Lorne Michaels of Saturday Night Live, one of the longest-running and most successful shows on tv abides by two rules related to participation: give everyone a voice, and force people to listen to each other. Michaels will often keep a sheet of paper during a meeting, and make a note each time someone speaks.  He will not end the session until others talk an approximately equal number of times.  He sees his job as protecting people’s distinct voices and getting them to work together productively.

2. Foster high social sensitivity within the group.  This is a fancy way of saying that people are skilled at reading the room.  Teammates can intuit how other members felt based on non-verbal cues – body language, tone of voice, facial expressions.  Members took into account what was said and unsaid and were sensitive to all those thoughts and emotions. So, how do these behaviors of being more attuned to others emerge?  In a New York Times article where Author Charles Duhigg writes about effective teams, he answers the question by saying, “The right norms – those small habits, unwritten rules, and mutually agreed-upon ways of treating one another - could raise a group’s collective intelligence, whereas the wrong norms could hobble a team, even if, individually, all the members were exceptionally bright.”  One recommendation by the Kellogg Insight would be to have more women on the team because they tend to be more socially perceptive.

When you set up the systems for all people to share openly and to really listen to each other, marvelous things can happen.  It has been shown that the quantity of ideas is where a lot of innovation stems, so nudging all your participants to get involved can advance your team’s creative purposes.

Quote: “The most important thing in communication is to hear what isn’t being said.”- Peter F. Drucker

Q: How do you ensure that each member is contributing equally?  Comment and share with us, we would love to hear.

*The next blog in this team series 8/10 will cover the importance of eating together for teambuilding.

As a Leadership Development & Executive Coach, I work with teams to facilitate the creation of norms and agreements for the best performance. Contact me to learn more.

Harness the power of the group for the most excellent results

5 Ways To Spark Full Team Participation (Team Series 6/10)

How do you encourage active participation from your team? 

Perhaps, you have an important decision to make and you want to get a lot of quality input in pursuit of the strongest solution.  So… you prepare the room, invite the key participants, and get ready to receive an abundant amount of ideas from every team member.  What you actually get instead is a group of mainly silent observers with a few dominant voices.  Indeed, it can be a challenge to get the very best from the group if there is not 100% participation.

Here are techniques you can use to encourage full participation:  

1. Call on quiet people.  Let people know in advance of the meeting that you value their opinion and want to include their voices so you would like to find ways to include them.  When you call on them it is because you are merely eager to hear their thoughts to reach the best decision possible.  This can have the intended effect of creating a safe space where they do not feel singled out and are more interested to share. To work with the style of introverts, you can give them some additional time to write their ideas first.

2. Use a default guideline, such as “silence denotes agreement.”  Author Bob Frisch talks about a common problem in meetings, which is when a potential new plan is discussed and when asked if anybody objects or has concerns, nobody says anything.  So the leader mistakenly assumes that everybody is on board.  A few days go by and some people begin to offer doubts, even though they had those same reservations at the time of the meeting.  To address this challenge, he recommends setting a key ground rule – silence means agreement.  This would prompt more people to open up; otherwise, it is safe to say that if they do not share, it is because they agree.  It is important to note that in a psychologically safe environment, people usually feel comfortable and empowered to contribute.  If this necessary condition is not present, there are other things that can be done to include people’s voices, but it is a temporary fix because psychological safety is an essential ingredient for long-term team success. 

3. Take anonymous polls.  People can write down their questions or concerns and deposit them in a box to be read aloud. They can also use polling websites that would allow them to submit their responses anonymously and have their answers projected for all to see in real-time.  A benefit is that potential problems can be aired for those people who may not want to speak up and possibly be seen as a naysayer.  This technique should be used sparingly because you want to try and have as much open discussion as possible, which is what you get in psychologically safe teams. 

4. Have small group discussions.  People are more likely to participate when they are just talking to one or two others.  After the time is allotted for them to flesh out their thoughts, each group can have a representative to report on the ideas or challenges.  This is also a great way to get introverts involved because it creates a more comfortable space to share.

5. Use empathy to elicit more voices.  Bob Frisch mentioned how people are more likely to speak up on others' behalf than their own.  A question, such as “what objections or concerns might your direct reports or other teams have,” can prompt additional participation.  This distance will allow them to share other people’s possible perspectives that may not have been offered if it was coming directly from them.

Each person on your team plays a vital part.  By not getting them involved, you are neglecting essential resources.  While there is no set way to encourage participation because it is a matter of doing what fits with your team and culture, building phycological safety and having communication norms will go a long way for creating excellence in teams.

Quote of the day: “Not all who are silent do not want to talk.” -Author Debasish Mridha

Q: What’s the best method you use to prompt somebody’s participation? Comment and share with us, we would love to hear from you!

*The next blog in this team series 7/10 will jump into the goal of achieving collective intelligence.

Full team participation can lead to your greatest discoveries

Bring On The Healthy Team Conflict (Team Series 4/10)

The ways your team interacts with each other can tell you a lot about the wellbeing of the whole.  One of the healthiest signs of a great team is to have smooth communication, and the way to do that is to have agreements or interaction norms that allow you to define who you want to be together. 

When teams first form, there can be surface-level harmony until they have gone through different seasons and have encountered significant disagreements. At that crucial point, they can reach a favorable resolution in both process and outcomes and cross the threshold to having an authentic team relationship for excellent performance to occur, or they can reach an impasse and remain in the stormy stage where team bonding and results are harder to come by.

To better navigate the rocky stage that every team goes through, expect, and even invite, healthy conflict. 

There is nothing wrong with conflict, tension, and disagreement.  Some people can be so nervous about it that they choose not to engage in a messy back and forth process for the sake of perennial harmony.  This mentality has its limitations because building on other’s ideas only gives you incremental thinking.  Worse yet, Writer Walter Lippmann maintains, “where we all think alike, nobody thinks very much.”  In contrast, when we disagree with each other, we can see a variety of perspectives and shine a light on our blind spots or incomplete ways of thinking.  We need disagreement to improve the quality of ideas and expose the risk inherent in the plan.  Plus, honest and respectful conversations usually yields the best results.  The opposite - passive-aggressiveness, silence, or even insincere contributions can be destructive to a culture.

Author Liane Davey outlined three specific techniques to help embrace productive conflict: 

1. Clarify Roles.  By highlighting how different people’s jobs drive different agendas, it can lead to excellent outcomes. Liane provides an example relating to the sales and production teams being in the same room; the production team might want more standardization and efficiency, while the sales group might argue for the opposite – more flexibility and customization to meet individual client needs.  There is an inherent tension between prioritizing the product for consistent quality versus favoring the customer for optimal satisfaction but likely a hit to the budget.  This is an important step for alerting people that they are expected to argue and disagree because they have different instructions for what they are representing.  This helps to depersonalize things, and you can see how your coworker is not living their life with the sole aim to frustrate you; in fact, they are just doing their job.  Being on the same team means you all want the same big-picture result.  Normalizing the tension will free people to spar in a more empathetic way as they strive towards finding the best answer constructively. 

2. Use personality assessments.  This can highlight differences in what people are paying attention to.  Maybe you have one person’s style who is high on the conscientiousness trait with a keen eye for detail, and another that is high on the openness chart and prone to the macro view.  Knowing your team’s orientation can create balanced groups and lead to productive disagreements.  

3. Set ground rules around dissension.  Ask your team to define the behavior that contributes to productive conflict?  What kind of engagements can improve decision-making and trust, and what kind can detract from it? 

Some behaviors can include: 

·       Be kind:  Disagree with the idea respectfully, not the person. Ad hominem attacks and wild bursts of anger should not be a thing. 

·       Be open-minded:  Do not reject an opposing point immediately, but follow a one-minute rule (accept an idea for one minute before you try and find anything wrong with it).  Think about the possibility – what if I was wrong? How willing am I to change my mind?

·       Be brief:  This allows many ideas to be voiced.  It is also hard to tease out ideas if one person is dominating the whole time.

·       Stay on topic:  This enables each subject to be flushed out before moving to the next issue. Avoid the trap of allowing people to take the conversation in a variety of directions because then it will be really challenging to make progress on each matter.

This sample set of ground rules can create contained chaos and lead to productive conflict. 

While some teams choose to shy away from conflict, the best teams know how to invite healthy conflict because it makes the overall group much more effective.  When you clarify roles, use data to create diverse groups, and set ground rules for disagreements, you cultivate the conditions for the best results to emerge. 

Quote of the day: “Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen” -Winston Churchill.

Q: How do you get your team to engage in merry conflict? Comment and share with us, we would love to hear from you!

*The next blog in this team series 5/10 will talk about the importance of universal agreements.

As a Leadership Development & Executive Coach, I work with teams to resolve conflict in productive ways for peak performance. Contact me to learn more.

How do you encourage healthy team conflict?

It’s All About A Team-First Mentality (Team Series 3/10)

In today’s driven society, it is not uncommon for companies to have teams filled with talented, ambitious, opinionated people with large egos who want to advance in their careers.

The temptation for people to stand out from the crowd for recognition, promotion, bonuses, and office size looms ever large.  Internal competition creeps in and those company perks become ways to keep score.  The word team, unfortunately, exists in name, but not in practice because it becomes a collection of rivals who want to pursue individual achievement over group success.  If unchecked, these intergroup conflicts can have adverse rippling effects. 

So, how do you encourage your members to act as a team?  In short, form a community.  Phil Jackson said, “Good teams become great ones when the members trust each other enough to surrender the Me for the We.”  Do not just think about your team as a compilation of members who are working towards completing a job.  Instead, see them as much more -  a community that supports each other to be better than they think they can be as they march towards a common goal that they also personally care about.  Teams that act as communities do not have to be best friends and spend all their time together, but they have to know how to integrate their interests and put aside differences. 

The benefits of a community cannot be ignored.  Those who feel like they are part of a supportive network at work are more engaged, more productive, and are less likely to experience burnout.  The simple fact is that teams of people who subordinate individual agendas will always outperform teams that do not. 

Here are some ways you can build community:

1. Understand your role as contributing to the greater good.  Numerous examples can be found in sports.  Shane Battier is known as a no-stats All-Star in basketball, he never scored a lot of points or got a lot of rebounds, but he made his teammates more effective and the opposing team less so.  His team was more likely to win with him in the game and was part of two NBA championships. He knew exactly what his role was, which was not to be the best small forward in the league by merely chasing stats but to do whatever he had to do to be the best for his team, even if it was in a set-up role that did not allow him to accumulate impressive stats.   

Similarly, in 2015, co-captain Abby Wambach, considered to be one of the most successful soccer players -  2x gold medalist and all-time top goal scorer of 184 - spent most of the World Cup on the bench.  She was called upon as a substitute only in the late stages of some games.  She shared how she did not let that discourage her, she always found ways to lead from the sidelines and champion her teammates because that is what was called for.  To win a game, it requires a coordinated effort on and off the field and she always found ways to uniquely contribute wherever she was standing.

2. Share credit.  This is a vital part of being on a team.  Author A.J. Jacobs shared a story about Jonas Salk taking sole credit for coming up with a polio vaccine and when given a chance, did not acknowledge any of his collaborators and predecessors who helped along the way.  Psychologists call this failure to recognize and thank collaboratives the responsibility or self-serving bias.  It is a pitfall that we should all avoid since it causes a lot of pain and resentment among other people.  So, how do you fight against the natural tendency of each member to exaggerate his/her contribution relative to the influence of other teammates?  Choose to elevate and reward cooperation, as well as individual achievement. Encouraging teammates to help each other thrive should garner just as much, if not more recognition. When you consistently catch people doing great things like mentoring others or pitching in on teammates’ projects, that should be valued and rewarded. This gesture clearly communicates the emphasis your culture places on teamwork.

Author and Startup Investor Fran Hauser offers some easy strategies to share credit for team success and to provide appreciation.  When you have a team win, you can do the following, depending on what you think the recipient would most enjoy:

·      Send an email to that person’s boss and CC your coworker.

·      Call out a coworker’s “good job” at a meeting - have the person stand up while everybody else claps.

·      Take a colleague out to lunch to celebrate teaming up on a job well done.

·      Treat a colleague to a small gift card at their favorite store for helping you.

·      Send the person a morning text letting them know you got them a Starbucks coffee if you know they get a latte every morning.

·      Write a handwritten note mentioning their specific contributions that made the team successful.

If a supervisor accidentally credits you with a good idea, you can interject to set the record straight by letting your boss know it was your coworker who came up with that idea.  If somebody has told you an idea in private and you are passing it along in front of a crowd, be sure to mention the source and your information. When you spread the credit, you pass along the love, trust, and pride in the team

3. Contribute as a problem-solver.  Being a part of a community involves having a collective mindset.  Going to a meeting and pitching in on solving a problem, even if it does not relate to you directly because you are invested in the group’s outcome.  It is also about taking ownership of the group’s success.  When you complain, think about it as if you are griping against yourself so instead of spreading negativity, what are 1-2 possible solutions you can offer that goes along with your constructive critique?

While you may not get the chance to choose your colleagues, you can always take steps to improve the dynamic. Simple gestures about asking about people’s days, sending an email letting them know you appreciate their work, and genuinely listening to others can make all the difference in feeling like a community.

“Ego is the ultimate killer on a team,” said Management Guru Patrick Lencioni.  One way to subdue the dominance of the ego is to encourage people to feel like they belong to a community where they enjoy numerous collective benefits when operating together more than they can ever experience individually.

Quote of the day: “Great things in business are never done by one person; they are done by a team of people.” — Steve Jobs

Question of the day:  How do you like experiencing a sense of belonging?  Comment and share with us, we would love to hear from you!

The next blog in this team series 4/10 will explore the importance of healthy conflict.

As a Leadership Development & Executive Coach, I work with teams to build community for peak performance. Contact me to learn more.

What can you build with a team-first mentality?

4 Common Delegation Maladies To Avoid (Delegation Series 4/4)

When delegation is done right, it is a glorious occurrence.  You can feel proud in supporting your teammate to be successful while also advancing the goals of your organization and spending time doing your most important work.  When it is done wrong, it can leave you embittered and reluctant from parting with important future tasks.  Let’s look at some ways delegation can go sideways.

1. Reverse delegation.  This is when people try to give you back part of the work.  They may come to you and say they cannot find the information and expect you to jump in and rescue the day.  Instead of completing the work for them, you can point them in the right direction.  They need to navigate their hiccups so they can develop problem-solving skills.  Ask the question – what do you think we should do in this situation, and watch their creativity come alive.

2. Over delegation.  Giving your team member a task that far outweighs their capacity would translate into more of a frustration than a learning opportunity.  To decide if the job is right for the person, you can ask these questions:

1. Did I provide the necessary resources?

2. Was I clear in outlining success?

3. Did I ask for feedback and consider input? 

If the answer to any of these questions is no, then it may be a case of over delegation.

3. Too hands-off.  Some managers delegate a task and then walk away.  It is important to stay involved while letting the employee lead the way. Carol Walker, President of Prepared to Lead offers, “While you don’t want to tell people how to do the job, you must be in a position to evaluate their performance and development.”  Clearly, delegation is not the same as abdication so be sure to guide their success. 

4. Lack of clarity. You may feel that once you have shared your assignment to be done that the person heard it in the exact way that you intended.  Brene Brown, in her book Dare to Lead, suggests an effective method for reaching a meeting of the minds by using the simple phrase, “Paint done for me.” This prompts the person to be specific in their expectations and clear in their intentions.  She says, “it gives the people who are charged with the task tons of color and context and fosters curiosity, learning, collaboration, reality-checking, and ultimately success.”   I recommend using this language in the co-creation phase, which was outlined in the second blog of this delegation series. 

Quote of the day: “The inability to delegate is one of the biggest problems I see with managers at all levels.”  – Eli Broad, entrepreneur

Q: What is one delegation challenge you faced in working with a teammate? How would you tackle that same challenge next time? Comment and share with us, we would love to hear from you!

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to help them delegate more effectively, contact me to explore this topic further.

Avoid Reverse Delegation