Effective Networking Questions and Frameworks to Further Enhance Your Prowess (networking series 4/4)

August 6, 2024 Regina Zafonte

While the last article focused on how to network effectively, in this installment of our networking series, we delve into the art of small talk and conversational building techniques and talk tracks to prepare for many networking situations.

Small Talk, Big Impact

Many people downplay small talk as a conversation about less important things, often between people who do not know each other well. They trivialize it as surface speak and a time waster. Whether you love or hate it, it might be more important than you think. We mainly do it to scan for topics to find common ground and develop initial rapport. Factual questions such as where you grew up, what you do for fun, or what your family is like allow you to build trust and invite others to go deeper. However, if you are lazy by just speaking about one thing, casually rambling, and asking close-ended questions, you will make people want to walk away from the conversation because it is boring. Examples include, do you like the conference? When is your flight home? If your energy is low, you show the person that you are not into it, and nobody wants that kind of small and low-energy talk.

Topics for Meaningful Conversations: Building Your Toolbox

Here's a curated list of conversation starters and follow-up questions to guide your interactions and keep conversations flowing naturally:

· Location. Where are you based / where is home for you? What is the most interesting thing about your town/city? What do you like best or least about where you live? Have you ever considered living in another place? If they are not from the area they grew up, you can ask what they miss most about home? How did you like growing up there? Where did you grow up? How is it different than where you live now?

· Company Experience. What was your journey through the company? If they are new to the company, you can ask, what did you do beforehand, and what attracted you here? Which mentors or leadership have been most influential in your growth?

· Career. How did you get into your career? Is it much different than what you wanted to do when you were younger? What did you study in school, and how did you decide to study that? What do you love about your career? What’s most exciting about your industry right now? What do you think about doing next in your career?

· Travel. Have you had the opportunity to do some summer (or whatever season) travel yet? Do you have any upcoming travel? What do you like to do or where do you like to eat when you visit this city?

· Food and Drink. What are you drinking? What restaurants would you recommend? What is the signature dish you like to order?

· Sports. What team are you rooting for this year? How did you get into being a fan of this team?

· Hobbies. What do you like to do for fun? What’s been energizing you personally lately? What are some of the things you have been passionate about lately? What keeps you busy outside of work? What are you reading/ watching/ listening to right now that is worth checking out?

· General. What have been some highs and lows for you this year / recently? How do you like spending your weekends?

Common Scenarios and Approaches: Tailoring Your Conversations

1. Following Up After an Online Event. You can reach out to the Speaker or Attendee:

· Send a message on Linkedin with a note. “I enjoyed your talk, especially the point you made about…. Sometimes speakers make a comment that they do not feel is significant, but if it stuck with you for whatever reason, tell them why; it is helpful to know that.

· I appreciated the information/comment you shared; I work in a similar space and would love to connect to chat with you about x. Can I send an email to set up some time to connect?

· Your talk/comment was insightful. I’ve been in the space for a few years and would love to hear about how you overcame the challenge of…

2. Logging on to Zoom before the meeting begins:

· Where are you based? If they bring up something in the news, you can follow up on that. For example, I hear there is more snow than usual in your area, is that affecting you?

· How is the weather near you? Is that common for this time of year?

· What are you all looking forward to this week/month/season?

3. In-person conferences:

· You can ask about what their favorite session was so far. You can ask a follow-up to discover what they learned from it or why it stuck with them. If that was also your favorite, you could discuss the concepts more deeply.

· If they traveled from another city, you could ask where they are coming from, how their flight was, and what is one of the first places they are excited to visit while they are here.

4. Networking Events

· How do you know the event organizer? How did you hear about this event? What brought you here tonight? What are you hoping to get out of this event?

· Have you come to one of these before, and if so, what stood out for you?

5. Asking Somebody to Coffee

· I heard how well your presentation went to the executive board. Can I take you to coffee and learn about what you’ve done in this aspect?

· Everybody is talking about what you did with this customer and this project I’d love to learn more.

6. Requesting Introductions

· You can say, “Who do you know in this organization who is a great teacher or doing an excellent job that you think would be valuable to connect with?”

7. Here is a framework for approaching informational interviews within your company to learn about other opportunities and possibly change teams

· Introductions

o Give your pitch & general information about yourself (what excites you and what are your goals)

o Find out about the person, their team, structure/composition, goals.

· Uncover more details.

o Ask specifically about the things you are interested in. How does your team experience career development? How does your team advance diversity efforts?

· Express interest and have an ask.

o I am interested in what you said about the work your team is doing and the culture you create, I’d love to stay connected. What is the best way to learn about new or upcoming roles?

o If you need assistance; I’d be happy to take on an assignment (if you have the capacity, this is an opportunity for you to stretch your experience and learn more about the team.)

o Is there anybody else you think would be valuable to connect with about this topic / about x, y, or z topic.

8. Here is a framework for developing more robust cross-functional / stakeholder meetings, especially if you just joined the company and are in your 30-day Listening Tour

· Small talks

o How did you get to where you are?

o Where did you grow up, where do you live, and what do you like about where you live?

o What do you like to do outside of work?

· Introductions

o Share your story and hear theirs

· Function-related questions.

o High-level questions to help understand the vision and strategy and find areas to connect

o Specific questions to understand the engineering, data, product, or processes better

· Team Structure

o How is your team structured?

o Who is outsourced, and who is not? How do you pull in resources?

o How do they perform compared to other top teams, and what contributes to their success

· Future direction/alignment

o Where do you see this product going/ what is the alignment?

· Ways of working.

o What is the best way for us to work together going forward?

o What’s the best cadence for us to connect?

By mastering effective networking questions and conversation frameworks, you can elevate your networking approach and unlock many opportunities. Every interaction is a chance to forge meaningful connections and cultivate valuable relationships that can propel your personal and professional growth.

Quote of the day: "Opportunities do not float like clouds in the sky. They're attached to people. If you're looking for an opportunity, you're really looking for a person." - Reid Hoffman.

Question: What’s one of the best questions you have been asked that allowed for a deeper connection? Comment and share below; we’d love to hear from you!

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to strengthen their internal and external networking approaches for win-win opportunities, contact me to explore this topic further.

What questions do you ask for networking success?

Elevating Your Networking Game: Best Practices and Proven Methods (networking series 3/4)

July 16, 2024 Regina Zafonte

Whether you're a seasoned professional or just starting your career path, mastering these networking techniques can propel you toward your goals with confidence and purpose.

Before Networking Beings: Prepare for Success:

1. Craft Your Elevator Pitch. The question, “What do you do,” is one that many dread because they do not like talking about themselves or are not sure how to do it effectively. Instead of responding with your profession, “I’m a Product Engineer,” you can talk about the problem you solve or the passion that drives you before sharing your role. You should deliver it succinctly in less than 90 seconds and choose a starting point that resonates with your audience's interests.

1A. Start with the Problem. For example, “Most small businesses fail; I am a VP at X company focused on helping budding entrepreneurs be successful. I teach them to write impactful business plans, perfect their pitches, and get seed funding so they can beat the odds and live their dream as a business owner depositing positive impact.”

1B. Start with Passion. Share your enthusiasm for your work and its impact. For example, “I live to make other people successful. As a Communication Coach, I help business leaders with their executive presence so they are noticed in the boardroom, inspirational speeches so they can empower their teams to do great things, and influencing skills to better collaborate with their stakeholders to get work done. If you wanted to start with your role before sharing your passion, you could say, “As a Sr. Director of Member Experiences, I am passionate about championing technology to solve business problems and creating delightful customer experiences. One product I helped to create recently positively impacted customers as they were able to… .”

2. Define your Current Networking Goal. Clarify your objectives, whether finding a mentor, advancing your career, growing your business, or building a professional support network. Understanding what success looks like enables you to network with intention.

3. Identify Key Contacts. If you are attending a big event, it can be overwhelming not to have a plan. However, if you can access the invite list and research and target individuals who align with your goals before attending, that can be effective. You can even email them in advance about your excitement in connecting. This proactive approach will save time and energy, especially for introverts who can quickly get drained. Instead of being exhausted by a 2–3-hour event, if you have met your goal and had three meaningful connections, you can leave after 40 minutes to not get burned out by the experience. While this is just a tentative plan, if you meet people who are not on your list and the interaction is fruitful, you can also consider that a success.

4. Prepare Your Ask. If an opportunity presents itself, for example, they say, “I love what you are trying to do; how can I help you?” It would be a missed chance if you had nothing meaningful to ask. You may want an introduction with their peer or an opportunity to connect again to learn about their career journey because you want to make a similar shift. When in doubt, asking for learning and connection opportunities is always good.

5. Define your Offer. Consider 1-3 things you can offer in case they need assistance. It is essential to understand your time constraints so you can provide an appropriate offer with the allotted time you have to spare.

5. Create a List of questions. Prepare a few engaging questions to facilitate meaningful conversations. Having them ready in advance alleviates the pressure and fosters genuine interactions. This will be the focus of the next article.

6. Craft Short stories. You can prepare 1-2 interesting anecdotes to captivate your audience and illustrate your experiences. You can reuse the same tales in different settings, and as you continue to network, you can gain inspiration to create more based on what others share so you can enhance your repertoire.

During Networking: Navigating Conversations with Finesse

1. Ask Thoughtful Questions. It is refreshing to get asked questions that are not frequently asked. Instead of doing what others do by asking typical inquiries such as, “What do you do,” you can encourage meaningful dialogue, “What’s your favorite part of your work? “What’s been energizing you personally and professionally this month? What’s the last thing you learned?" What’s one way you hope to grow this year?” You can lead the way by responding first to foster authentic exchanges.

2. Demonstrate Active Listening Skills. Dale Carnegie says to be interested rather than interesting. The sentiment concerns allowing others to talk, not just dominating the conversation. When you listen to people, you are not cued up with the next thing to say; instead, you are picking up on something important and asking follow-up questions. It is always helpful to listen to what they value or to the bigger picture and give them opportunities to talk more about that.

3. Find shared interests. Find common ground to establish rapport and deepen connection. They may mention that they just returned from traveling to a city and you had a fantastic experience there. You can share a memorable restaurant and discover your love of food or the beauty of the city. Small talk can lead to significant discoveries and lay the foundation for meaningful relationships. For example, you learn it always snows where they live and ask how they take advantage of that weather. They respond with their passion for skiing, which you happen to share, you will have much to explore on that topic. Or that they live in a town with popular sports teams, and you can connect over that.

4. Offer Appropriate Vulnerability. Share relatable anecdotes or experiences. There is a phenomenon called the Beautiful Mess Effect, put forth by a team of psychologists writing in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, which states that contrary to our worst fears, having the courage to show our vulnerabilities is often rewarded and viewed more favorably by others. When sharing a time that you screwed up in a low-risk way or something similar can breed trust and strengthen the relationship.

Post-Networking: Sustaining and Nurturing Connection

1. Send Follow-up Messages. Reach out to those you connected with, expressing gratitude and suggesting future interactions. For example, “It was great meeting you. I enjoyed what you said about X, and I’d love to connect again; you mentioned you would be at the X conference in 2 months; maybe we can grab lunch there? If you do not have an event coming up, consider following up every few months. Building networks, while important, never feels urgent, and when you consistently reach out, you lay the foundation to develop strong relationships long before you might need anything.

2. Reach Out to Missed Connections. Do not hesitate to contact individuals you intended to meet but did not have the chance to connect with. Express your interest in engaging further and propose alternative meeting options. For example, “I attended this event and was looking forward to chatting with you because of your work in this area; I’d still love a chance to connect via Zoom or set up a coffee chat. Please let me know if a time window might work best for your schedule; I am happy to accommodate whatever might work for you.”

3. Maintain a Tracker. Keep a record of your networking interactions, including dates, where you met them, topics discussed, and follow-up actions such as when you would like to connect next and over what topic. If you are finding interesting articles that they may enjoy, you can send them to keep the connection alive, but be sure to personalize the message and be thoughtful about what you are sending. I know you said you were traveling to Belgium next month. I came across this interesting article about this new exhibit that opened, and I thought you might enjoy it given your love of art.

Record your networking interactions, including dates, topics discussed, and follow-up actions. Regularly update and review your tracker to stay on top of your networking efforts.

By implementing these strategies, you can navigate networking with confidence and purpose, unlocking numerous opportunities along the way. Networking is not just about making connections—it's about cultivating meaningful relationships that can enrich your personal and professional life.

Quote of the day: “Your network is your net worth.” -Peter Gale

Question: What’s your best networking strategy? Comment and share below; we’d love to hear from you!

The final blog in this series 4/4 will focus on effective networking questions and frameworks.

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to strengthen their internal and external networking approaches for win-win opportunities. Contact me to explore this topic further.

Navigating Networks: Exploring the Pathways to Professional Success (networking series 2/4)

July 2, 2024 Regina Zafonte

Building on the previous article focused on the challenges and benefits of networking, this article delves into the diverse types of networks available to assist you in achieving your goals.

Let’s explore three types:

1. Internal Network. In your workplace, if you are a part of a small team at a medium to large company, you may only spend time with your manager, direct reports, and peers you collaborate with. Engaging with people in different parts of the company is helpful to broaden your understanding of the business and uncover potential collaborative opportunities. These relationships usually do not happen organically, they must be intentionally cultivated. When you go to a company event, do not just gravitate to the people you already know, set a goal to get to know a few people you have never spoken to and start building those relationship.

2. External Network. These avenues offer opportunities to connect beyond the confines of your workplace. Executives are likelier to build connections through conferences, events, and cross-industry professional networking groups. Managers and directors are more likely to develop their networks through past and current colleagues. Let’s take a look at a few:

2A. Industry Conferences. These are places to connect with people in your same industry. For example, you may attend SHRM (Society of Human Resource Management), one of the world’s largest conferences for HR professionals to learn about industry trends.

2B. Role/Function Conferences. These events attract people in your same position. For example, you may attend ProductCon, the world’s largest conference that takes place 4x a year and gathers people from around the world in this Product Manager or adjacent roles to explore the hottest topics in the space.

2C. Mixed Conferences or Professional Organizations. These conferences usually have a blend of people from different roles and industries. For example, Chief is one of the largest professional female Organizations that brings together C-Level and Vice President leaders in various companies in various roles to empower great leaders. As an Executive Coach and Group Facilitator at this organization, many women have expressed to me how incredibly valuable it has been personally and professionally to tackle similar challenges.

2D. Skill-Based Networking. You can take classes, certifications, or workshops to strengthen your abilities. That is usually a great place to meet people because you already have similar interests and can create a relationship as a learning partner.

3. Social Networking. In addition to professional settings, social gatherings, and community activities also serve as networking opportunities. Join local meetups, volunteer organizations, and Facebook groups, or engage in neighborhood activities to connect with individuals with common interests. These interactions, while primarily personal, can offer unexpected professional benefits.

4. Existing Personal Network. Reconnect with individuals from your past, including former classmates, coworkers, and neighbors. These "weak ties" can prove invaluable in connecting you with new opportunities and resources. Don't underestimate the power of rekindling old connections.

By understanding the diverse landscapes of networking, you can strategically navigate the process and leverage each network's unique benefits.

Quote of the day: "Succeeding in business is all about making the right connections." - Richard Branson

Question: Which unexpected place did you have success with networking? Comment and share below; we’d love to hear from you!

The next blog in this series, 3/4, will focus on how to network effectively.

Mastering Networking: Overcoming Challenges, Embracing Benefits (networking series 1/4)

June 18, 2024 Regina Zafonte

Networking is a vital facet of one's professional journey. It stands as a crucial bridge between opportunities, connections, and growth. Despite its undeniable importance, networking remains a daunting and even disliked endeavor for many. This paradox highlights the need for a deeper understanding of networking's nuances, strategies, and the potential it holds for personal and professional development.

What Networking Is Not

Some people have an aversion to networking because it conjures up slick, self-interested, manipulative tactics to get things you may not deserve. It is not just about pitching, selling, delivering long speeches, and aiming to close business on the spot. It is not a hyper-focus on you and what you are trying to do. It is not about hassling people or using them to get something you want done. It’s undoubtedly not transactional. These are all descriptions of when networking is done wrong.

Defining What Networking Is

Genuine networking is the act of building and maintaining mutually beneficial relationships. When done well, the goal is to advance your career or business and to provide help for others for collective benefit. London Business School Professor Herminia Ibarra says networking or creating a fabric of personal contacts to provide support, feedback, insight, and resources is essential for every manager. Many people think they must network when ready to job hunt, but it is about the long game – building authentic connections that can bear fruit down the line. It’s a chance to have flourishing relationships and tap into insights and resources from a trusted group.

Challenges in Networking

Herminia Ibarra Highlights Challenges that Executives Face:

1. Reluctance to Ask for Help. As an accomplished, high achiever, it can feel hard to ask for assistance. You may have gotten good at self-reliance and think you can rely on your strength to pull you through the way you have done your whole life. While people underestimate other’s willingness to help, multiple studies confirm that most of us like to assist. We are social creatures, and it’s one of those things that make us feel good. When you practice the activity, especially in low-risk situations, and start to see some results, your comfort with asking for help will grow.

2. Prioritizing Secrecy. Some people want to reach out to others but do not want them to know they are job searching or unhappy in their current position. They are also worried that the word will get out, which could jeopardize their current position, especially with industries or roles with smaller circles or in communities where everybody knows one another. One of my clients was looking to switch positions, which would involve a move, and she was waiting to talk to her children because she worried that they would tell their best friends who have parents who work at the same place and are connected to other community members, which would get back to her boss.

In situations where people have been laid off, some feel embarrassed to share, however there are ways you can take command of the narrative. If you were a part of a more massive layoff or your role got eliminated, these things happen, especially the higher up you go as the company goes in a different direction. If you feel like there are too many systemic issues preventing your success, you can share what you are moving toward rather than what you are moving away from. If you do not share with others, you lose the potential of connecting with somebody who can help you. Finding a new position can take a long time, so instead of guarding your intentions too closely and stressing about the process, you can suspend your pride and put yourself in a position to forge a valuable connection.

3. Unrealistic Expectations. When we get to higher executive levels of our career, it can take as little as three months and as long as 18 months to find the right fit. You may have amassed an incredible resume and would be an asset to any company, but there may not be an available role. Networking can take a long time to learn about potential future roles. You may meet one person who might share an opening for a VP role four months from now when this leader is planning on retiring and their successor recently left to take a position elsewhere, so there is no leading internal candidate. If we are changing industries or careers, it will take a while to strengthen our skillsets and figure out what we might want to do and that will entail a lot of conversations that will provide helpful clues as you travel on your path of what you could want next. Patience is key, as connections can lead to opportunities when you least expect them.

4. Not Wanting to Put in the Work. It takes time to have a lot of conversations with people and be intentional about attending events. The dedication required is often on top of a full-time job so you can imagine it being a draining experience. What compounds the problem is that most people have not invested in their network, so they can feel like they are starting from zero. They could think 2-3 connection points are needed before they ask about something they want, and with busy executives, those meetings can take many months to set up. If you have already laid the foundation to build a strong network and are clear on your goals, that process can be shortened.

Herminia Ibarra recommends listing up to 100 contacts, former employers, clients, and customers and writing down the names of the people you met in those roles. There will be some people on that list who will be information givers who can tell you about the market, companies, and hiring trends and some who will be door openers who will vouch for you and introduce you to decision makers because you have worked with them in the past or have a strong connection. By being organized with how you keep track of your connections, the work you are putting in can bear greater fruit.

5. Overly Focusing on the Narrative. Many people spend a lot of time talking about themselves without getting to the heart of forming a mutually beneficial relationship. They do not have a clear ask or they do not learn what the other person is interested in to find those win-win opportunities. Spending too much time talking about why you are unhappy or the past rather than talking about what excites you and what you are moving toward. The best practice is to be direct, concise, positive, and future-oriented.

6. Failing to tailor your story. People spend so much time perfecting their elevator speech and using the same one on multiple audiences rather than customizing it. A talk track can be divided into parts, and while some pieces can remain the same, especially in terms of what you are passionate about or the problems you are eager to solve, you want to customize other sections depending on your audience that will resonate the most.

Benefits of Networking

1. Building Good Relationships. You create trust and strengthen connections by offering assistance and valuable resources while expecting nothing in return. Cultivating those genuine interactions, expanding common interests, and feeling like you have a support team that you can go to for career and life advice will add significantly to your happiness. Psychotherapist Esther Perel said, “The quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives.”

2. Advancing your career. When it comes to career advancement, most people realize that sometimes it’s not always what you know, but who you know.” One study found that more than 70% of Fortune 1000 CEOs, mostly white men said they have done business with someone they met on the golf course. Additionally, 80% of Fortune 500 executives said golf has helped their careers. Another study shows that over 80% of women at and above management level said they have used networking relationships to join a board, break into the C-Suite, or accept a new job with better pay. People do not hire resumes, they recruit people they like, who are interesting, and interested in what you are saying because of their curiosity.

Networking is a multifaceted endeavor with the potential to shape careers and lives positively. By dispelling misconceptions, navigating challenges, and leveraging the benefits, individuals can harness the true power of networking.

Quote of the day: "The richest people in the world look for and build networks; everyone else looks for work." - Robert Kiyosaki

Question: What’s your biggest challenge when it comes to networking? Comment and share below; we’d love to hear from you!

The next blog in this series 2/4 will focus on types of networks and where to network.